What a hero! The courage it takes in this day and age to admit that you are a Christian? Few of us can even imagine such fortitude. As you probably know, Christians these days are just super scared of admitting that they are Christian and that’s why you know who all the Jews and Muslims are, because of racism the American Defeatist, Barack “Hussein” “War on Christmas” Obama (who is also the mastermind behind the separation of Church and State) but have you ever met a Christian in real life? Probably not. I read all about it in The Newspaper. It is particularly impressive of Rick Perry to start off with how he is a Christian and then IMMEDIATELY spout off some of the most hateful bigotry ever seen in a political campaign ad. BOOM! CLASSIC! GOD IS SMILING DOWN UPON THIS WONDERFUL MAN! He’s definitely got my vote. When God closes a Herman Cain, he opens a Rick Perry. (Thanks for the tip, Gideon.)

Comments (103)
  1. Not enough Pokemon quotes. How will I know I can be the best?

  2. I like how Christian is apparently the only religion. Ever.

    • I look forward to him championing the US’s religious heritage by promoting the teaching of various Aboriginal religious traditions in schools.

      Oh, you mean that’s not what he meant?

    • And apparently, there are no Christians who DON’T think that gays are ruining America.

  3. Oh, fuck you!

    • Such a piece of garbage. Makes me think of that Futurama episode where they have to make a ball of garbage to deflect an incoming ball of garbage asteroid or New New York gets wiped off the map. They should have just used Rick Perry’s ideas.

  4. it is high time for the war on the war on the war on Christmas.

  5. Christians think they are forever being crucified

    • Really! They have such Martyr complexes.

    • That’s one of my favorite quotes from the Denis Leary/Kevin Spacey film, The Ref. Spacey yells at his overbearing mother that he knows what he’s going to get her for next year: a giant CROSS. That way, whenever she’s feeling under-appreciated she can climb on up there and nail herself to it.

      Now THAT’S a Christmas movie.

  6. What the fuck is he on about? Who’s fighting a war on religion? When did Obama make any rules at all regarding school prayer? The Supreme Court banned school-led prayer about a million years ago! And for fuck’s sake, you ARE allowed to pray in school!

    There are so many actual problems in the world, and these fuckwits are making up phony ones to rile up my least favorite cousins on Facebook. A pox on your house, dickweed.

    • Nobody actually needs proof anymore.

    • Yeah, the ‘war on Christmas’ thing drives me absolutely bonkers. Who’s buying that? We just had a Christmas party at work where people sang actual Christmas carols, and we’re having another next week with a gift exchange. Everyone’s cubicles have lights strung up on them, as do the streets where I live (supplied by the city). Everyone is releasing a bad Christmas album and every store you go into is Bananas Christmas Town and they are playing things like Rudolph on the TV. I’m constantly fighting the urge to barf from Christmas overload. GIVE ME A BREAK.

  7. I thought I read in elementary school that one of the big reasons people came over to “great America” was to escape religious persecution. How is this dude’s christian sharia in any way meant to get us back to what made the country? hate this guy. so much.

  8. You know, Rick Perry, students can pray in school if they so choose. It just can’t be school or teacher led. TMYK! Do some research, Rick.

  9. so right now the republican field is: a twice divorced spendthrift ego maniacal idiot that was basically kicked out of the party 15 years ago, a mormon robot that will believe whatever any poll wants him to believe that no one likes, and george w. bush’s even more fucking stupid and hateful asshole younger brother. what this says about the leaders reflecting those they lead is truly amazing.

    • You have my lilly-livered, microbrew-sipping, Fleet Foxes upvote.

    • “What about us?!?” – Paul, Huntsman, Bachman, Santorum, Karger

      The story of Fred Karger is so sad. He’s the gay Republican running that announced his campaign before most of the current candidates, but all of the party caucuses blacklisted him from the forums and debates so the mainstream media isn’t even bothering to cover him. Iowa was like “if you come to our primary we will have you evicted” but the party is not anti-gay. Nope, not at all. Just ask the log cabin republicans.

      • i left out those four because obviously there is no way that any of them would get the nomination. one is too isolationist and wants to legalize drugs, one believes in evolution and is also mormon, one is a lady, one is gay, and one is rick santorum.

  10. You guys need to take this more seriously. A coworker of mine was humming “Frosty the Snowman” this morning — then some ObamaForce goons escorted her from her desk. We’ll never see her again…

    When Bush was president, my family put up Christmas decorations, but these year we’re draping the house in Hamas flags to throw the ObamaForce off our scent.

  11. This video made me NSFW. I watched it then involuntarily said loudly: “You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me. ” Luckily everyone here agrees.

  12. He SHOULD be embarrassed

  13. “Rick Perry, I’m glad you could take time out from spitting on homosexuals and muslims to be here today.”

    Whenever I even see Rick Perry I always hear Greg Giraldo’s voice in my head, making the joke he made about Toby Keith during the Larry the Cable Guy roast, but tailoring it for whomever Rick Perry is slurring hate speech at.

  14. Perry’s getting his information from the same place as this:

  15. Yikes! So many Yikes!

    Rick Perry, President of the Yikes-nited States of America.

  16. Honey, are you going out to hate the gays? Don’t forget your farm jacket!

  17. This, right after his amazing response to Hillary Clinton’s human rights speech (Perry: “promoting special rights for gays in foreign countries is not in America’s interests and not worth a dime of taxpayers’ money”), really makes him an American hero. What an inspiration to us all.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-16062937

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go pray for Rick Perry to walk straight into a tar pit.

    • i love how “special rights” means “the right for you not to be legally killed by your government because of your sexual orientation”. perry obvious wants it to be okay for everyone to have equal opportunity for state sanctioned execution.

      • Well, if Rick Perry has proved he loves anything, it is definitely execution.

      • You know what it says in the Bible: “Let he who is without sin throw all of the stones at them there homosexuals.”

      • I mean, it’s just so ridiculous that there are gay people in other countries not getting murdered when there are children right here in America being forced to say “happy holidays” instead of “merry Christmas.”

    • I watched this right after watching the Clinton speech (thanks Gangy!), and it was the reverse of a refreshing chaser. The difference between the two parties has never been more stark (I know Perry doesn’t represent all Republican voters, or even the Republican party as a whole – but he hasn’t been disavowed by them and all the candidates are saying similar things). I wish I were American so I could not vote for him.

  18. Somebody’s been drinking the Santorum Kool-aid

  19. “Gays shouldn’t be in the military because Merry Christmas!”

  20. You know who doesn’t care if homosexuals can serve in the military or whether or not kids can pray in school? These guys:

  21. Excellent wardrobe choice, Mr. Perry. Totally no homo.

  22. If you see a kid openly celebrating Christmas today, please make sure you report them to 1-800-XONXMAS

  23. But Perry’s right you guys! Our country was built on faith!. Faith in trees! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_Enlightenment#Deism

  24. And to answer your question, I’ve read ma Gordon Wood: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9GDYR6O0pY

  25. “I’m Rick Perry and I approve this message” is where he really lost me.

  26. If you listen to his voice it kind of quivers some here and there; I think it’s because he’s a little ashamed and embarrassed that this is what his campaign has resorted to. … Sorry I guess I should say something funny but I just thought I would point that out.

  27. dear politicians,

    stop making up fake problems in order to cover up the fact that you are not intelligent enough to solve the real problems.

  28. When I was younger I was very very very religous. I became this way after I read a description of hell somewhere and to this day that description is the most terrifying thing I’ve ever read. Upon reading this I decided to become a christian not because I believe in God, but because Iwas afraid of going to hell. I read the bible and obeyed every commandment written in it. One commandment that I specifically paid attention to was Leviticus 18:22 which states “Man shall not lay with man, it is abomination” I began to be very homophobic, used the word ‘fag’ as often as I could and even blamed some of my problems on gays. A few years later after some thought and a confusing dream involving Paul Newman circa 1958 and a hotel room in Venice I realized that I am gay. A few months later, I came out and I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. What I’m saying is, if you ever need to talk Rick, I’m here for you.

  29. Why isn’t he refusing to apologize for the greatness of the United States of America?
    Where did he get a J. Crew barn jacket from 1991?
    Where is his theme song?

    This video raises more questions than it answers.

    • You mean like “how on Earth did he manage to make a connection between gays in the military and school prayer”? Because that’s what I’m wondering. He just mentions them back to back as thought they’re linked. They are not!

  30. You guys, joking aside, this thread makes me feel optimistic. I am honestly, seriously terrified that someone from this traveling circus of garbage clowns will lead our country. Like, legitimately scared. I know most of us are like-minded, but to see everyone dismiss this as the trash it is gives me a little hope.

    • a few years ago i was running a focus group regarding politics in the US south, and one of the participants- who was an upstanding member of the community!- just came out and said, “i think what needs to happen here is that the older generations, the ones just filled with hate and confusion, need to die and then the rest of us can just get on with organizing and running our communities”. so. my happy thought regarding the south is someday everyone from rick perry’s generation will be dead and we can just move beyond their fucked up bullshit.

      • Is there a timeline for that? Because the apocalypse is coming up right quick. It sure as shit is gonna suck when just when everyone agrees that worrying about gays and happy holidays v. merry christmas was fucking stupid, we’re all pushing shopping carts through burned out forests filled with cannibals.

  31. THE DEVIL IS ALIVE AND WELL IN EAST TEXAS

  32. Isn’t the music that’s playing from when you zoom up to the castle at the beginning of Disney movies?

  33. it’s really sad that people like Rick Perry and other Christians in the media make Christianity have such a bad name for itself in America. it’s people like that that are the reason that so many citizens see Christians the way they do. Rick Perry is taking a faith based on love and understanding and twisting it to suit his own political agenda. pathetic.

  34. 12 seconds in I screamed “YOU SUCK!” at my computer screen. Rick Perry gives me truth tourettes.

  35. Just out of curiosity, I’ve been reloading the page for this video every couple seconds. When I started typing this comment there were 55,406 dislikes and 1,312 likes. There are now 56,016 dislikes, and only 1,321 likes.

    This gives me hope.

  36. you a dick, rick.

  37. But who will end the war against the muppets?

  38. Rick Perry is the reason I’m super scared of admitting I’m a Christian :(
    Phew, that’s certainly difficult to do while hiding behind an internet-shaped wall of anonymity. Guys, don’t nail me to planks for that?

  39. This video is ridin’ “Strong” with 164,000 dislikes after one day on youtube. Time to go away now, Perry. Ooops.

  40. Hat tip to Mr. Frank Conniff, who said, “Rick Perry’s new homophobic campaign ad is a big hit with his core base: closeted gay Christians who hate themselves.”

  41. You know, we shouldn’t be surprised. This is our fault. Our fault for voting in Barack Obama and pretending that we could be normal, decent people. For assuming that the rest of the country could get their collective heads out of their collective asses long enough to see what is actually happening in the world and in our own country. Instead, we get a nation of people* with their heads in the sand like so many ostriches, shouting “NOPE. CHUCK TESTA. GAYS OR SOMETHING. FEAR.”

    Cause and effect. This is as reactionary as it gets.

    * = hopefully so so so so few actual people.

    Oh, Happy Christmasolidays.

  42. I’m from Iowa and I know so many people that get really upset that kids have “Holiday” parties at school, instead of “Christmas” parties. They feel as though something is being taken away from them. These are typically the same people who say stuff like: “when my kids were babies, they slept with a blanket and a bumper and I put them on their stomachs and they’re all alive!” or “my daughter rode in the front seat without a car seat when she was 6, and she is fine!” They get upset when there is new research that shows that kids should not be spanked, because “my parents hit me with a switch and I’m doing great! Are you saying that I had bad parents?” (NO! I’m saying that they were working with what they knew at the time! Now we know better, so we should do better!)

    I guess what I’m saying is, these people are afraid of change, so they’re using the bible to justify it. This isn’t about religious beliefs, this is about a fear that they will have to change the way they talk, act, treat others, etc. I think he would have done so much better if he would have left the ‘gays in the military’ bit out, because the ‘war on Christmas’ already implies that their is an attack on “Christian values”. Most people don’t want to seem like bigots (especially Iowans!), so saying something so clearly bigoted was not smart.

    He is a lot like George Bush, but he is missing something. Bush was able to talk to Christians using dog whistle type phrases that only Christians understood. He could have made this commercial, but in a way that is subtle and wouldn’t have pissed off so many people.

  43. I’m really happy about this thread. The Grand Old Party leaves me absolutely speechless. There’s a debate term, well several, but where you just assail with so many false factoids that your opponent doesn’t even know where to begin; it happened with Al Gore and W. But seriously I’m glad SOMEONE actually noticed that Rick Perry is totally wearing Heath Ledger’s jacket in Brokeback Mountain because HE TOTALLY IS.

  44. Alex Lane  |   Posted on Dec 13th, 2011 0

    http://youtu.be/BbrI3F7p6-o
    this is beautiful.

  45. Alex Lane  |   Posted on Dec 13th, 2011 0

    also everyone should report the video for its hate on freedom

  46. this is just bull. a whole lot of fucking bull

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