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At this point, writing a diatribe about hating Fred Phelps and his Westboro Baptist Church is as pointless and absurd as Fred Phelps pretending his new Christmas video is about Santa, but I’m going to do it anyway in case there’s one person who doesn’t already use Fred Phelps as the #1 example of evil in America. Fred and family are back with their annual Christmas festival of hate, bad singing, and brainwashed offspring, with “Santa Claus Will Take You To Hell.” Let us gaze upon it and let our hearts swell with the brotherhood we feel with every other person who can’t wait to see the beautiful day when the Reverend’s funeral is overtaken by joyous picketers:
(Via Socialcrisis.net Via Buzzfeed.) Normally, people this bad shouldn’t be rewarded with attention, but Fred Phelps deserves our attention, because he exists as the physical embodiment of reverse psychology: even the most homophobic person has been known, when confronted with the reality of Fred Phelps as the face of their own bigotry, to say something like “Well that man is just pure evil.” I bet even Elisabeth Hasselbeck hates Fred Phelps to the depth of her tiny black willfully ignorant heart. If everyone in the world just came together and put all their hate-feelings on Fred Phelps, the way the world came together against the aliens in Independence Day, the world would be a better place. At the very least, his Wikipedia page should be the top Google hit for Worst Person In The World instead of John Fitzgerald Page.
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I can’t decide if I should press play or not.
Don’t do it. It made me want to kidnap those children so they wouldn’t have to sing that song anymore. If any children need to be kidnapped for their own good, it’s those ones (guys, kidnapping is the solution to the world’s problems).
My, what pleasant husky voices those old hatemongers have.
Also, SNL needs to call Westboro to see who writes for them.
The large, conservative Baptist church I was raised in was once protested by the Westboro folks for being too liberal (note: there is no way that was happening.) They were really mad that we had a tacit policy that allowed homosexuals to come sit and hear that they were in sin. What Westboro wanted (obvs) was more of a guard dog at the church door policy (also obvs).
“Fag X-MAS”
HAHAHAHA, Is there anything these people don’t hate?
While I think the text of the “Fag Santa” sign is funnier, that illustration for “Fag Christmas” can’t be beat.
This man makes me physically ill. I’m not particularly religious, but I do believe that somewhere, sometime, some God will have his/her justice with this cretin. I only wish we could be there to watch.
I think unrelated conservative groups should just go ahead and apologize to the rest of America for this, acknowledging that getting all pissed off about homosexuality and abortions (et al.) only breeds further, more dyed-in-the-wool wackjob antics.
This is the first time I wished I owned a gun.
Ugh. That made me feel sick in the pit of my stomach. Poor kids, being raised to hate like that.
Comedy gold.
“You will eat your children”? What’s that all about?
I saw the title of this post and then the lede and I was all about to write a thing saying you should be quiet because the B-52′s are actually amazing but I realized I’m dumb.
i thought it was about Michael Phelps at first so you’re not alone.
“Santa Claus will rape your kids at night?!” What the fuck? He is real?
FAG SANTA! LOLZ! SANTA-DEVIL PORN!
Everyone in this video needs to be sent to attention whore jail with Anne Coulter and everyone on The Gossip Hills: OC.
i know this is a really esoteric issue, but what really confuses me is the effort they put into syncopating the triplet phrases in the music. its not in the music, and it makes me feel wierd that not only did some member of the church knew enough about jazz and choral music to add the technique, but he felt it was necessary enough to add numerous times, and obviously make them PRACTICE the fucking thing, because there’s no way anyone knew what they were doing.
plus i wouldn’t God Hate Jazz or something?
They have been doing this for years. I first saw them with a “Fag Santa” sign 6 years ago when my wife and I went to Topeka Kansas to have Thanksgiving with my Grandparents. The day after they were all over the place picketing stores with black friday sales with “fag santa” signs.
A couple years ago they also picketed my grandmother’s funeral. Well, not specifically, they were at the church my Grandparents attended to protest women or puppies or something, and it just happened to be on the day of her funeral. So they stood outside and yelled stuff about god hating everything. It was an interesting ambiance for a funeral.
they have nice voices, thanks.
I’ll be directing a production of Paul Rudnick’s “The Most Fabulous Story Ever Told” as part of an annual AIDs benefit this coming June. It is our fervent hope that Westboro gets wind of the show and comes to protest. Oh, the glorious publicity they will generate for us!
The Phelps Family Singers ARE the ending to THE WATCHMEN.
i was 10 feet away from fred phelps & co. when he protested my friends funeral. the police had to guard them so there weren’t riots. BUHLEE DAT!
Brother, I think you’re entitled to beat the snot out of Phelps & Co if they protest your friend’s funeral. I would congratulate you for doing so. The person that finally does come along and send Phelps to hell will be a national hero.
Further on your “Independence Day” coming together: maybe we could just get Will Smith to personally put Phelps in an early grave. No jury in the world would convict Will Smith.
My first exposure to Fred Phelps’ group was about 12 years ago when I visited a relative in Topeka. They were picketing at the zoo entrance with their “God Hates Fags” signs. As we drove by, I rolled down my window and said to them “God loves you!” and they waved to me. Then I added “Even though you’re all full of shit!”
I think these guys hate everybody and everything because I still don’t know why they’re convinced that the soldiers dying overseas are making God laugh. They came to Ohio earlier this year to protest a church for being too lenient towards gays…but that church was staunchly against gays, so they end up being the PETA of the religious world; doing it for the publicity.
I think it is beneficial that we have a person like Phelps in America. He so eloquently bridges the gaps between hating homosexuality, hating America, hating Santa, hating our soldiers, and being a radical “Christian.” There’s something there for everyone to dislike about Phelps. What better way can you think of to marginalize the entire campaign of radical Christians against gays than association of their movement with one so vile. Maybe some will pause and have a moment of absolute clarity in which they say, wait… I share core, driving beliefs with this guy!???