We can’t all be the best at everything. For example, some of us will only live to collect 50 – 100 clowns in our lifetimes. It’s true! Some of us will collect a few more, some even a few less, but the fact is that most of us won’t even break 1,000 — and that is ok. We all have our own things. And I know it’s true that owning the world’s largest clown collection may seem incredibly glamourous and, honestly, it does seem to be what everyone is striving for these days. But you know what? Only one person can own the world’s largest clown collection, and it may not even be all its cracked up to be. I know that sounds crazy. “But I’d have the most clowns,” you’re probably thinking. “What could be bad about having the most clowns?” Well, did you think about all the laughing that you’d have to do with all those clown dolls around? Just constant laughter. And the dusting? Constant dusting! And having the world’s eyes on you, each of them burning you with their intense jealousy? It’s no day at the circus, I’ll tell you that much. But it does seem wonderful, doesn’t it?

Ahhh, to live just for a day as the woman with the world’s largest collection of clowns. It’s hard to tell if it would even be worth it — the question attached being whether you’d rather live the rest of your life knowing what you’re missing, or continue on in blissful ignorance. A tough call, but luckily one that we’ll never have to make. (Via TheDailyWhat.)

Comments (15)
  1. For most people clowns lead them to drinking, glad to see someone doing exactly the opposite

  2. Today, I resolve in front of God and the entire Videogum community that I will never give up drinking.

  3. I think this universal fear of clowns is overblown. Statistics show that only 5% – 10% of them are evil. You just can’t tell which ones.

    • Are you the 1%, sorry 5-10%?

      • Actually, even I don’t know. We’re like sleeper cell drones, living normally and blissfully unaware of our condition until some trigger puts us into Evil mode (alla “Zoolander”). The trigger could be anything… a certain audio tone… a specific tapping sequence on our shoulder… being shown a girl with pink bunny ears…

  4. That is an insane clown posse.

  5. Think of all the money she could have spent on delicious German beer instead of horrifying clowns. I’m with R2D2, Esq. on this one.

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