New York magazine’s Vulture blog has a cute little story today about the time that Hugh Jackman and Baz Luhrman sang karaoke with Robert Pattinson in Japan. It is all very typical and exactly what you would expect from a quaint anecdote about singing karaoke with nothing super weird and completely unexpected thrown in there that you definitely didn’t see coming and are not clear on why everyone else is acting like it’s the normal way that things work. If anything it sounds like the evening was TOO normal.

Once upon a time in 2009, on a fateful flight to Japan, Hugh Jackman noticed that he was on the plane with mussed-head Twilight star Robert Pattinson. “I didn’t talk to him at all on the flight, because he’s this really tall guy with a hood over his head literally, and every time I’d go to the bathroom, I’d be like, ‘Man, that guy takes some serious sleeping pills,’ because this was him [slumps over] the whole time,” Jackman recalls to MTV. But when the plane landed and Pattinson struck up a conversation with Jackman and Baz Luhrmann, the two Aussies decided to invite him to a karaoke bar.

Sure! Fine! Wait for it…

“Man, he’s got a voice. Really soulful,” says Jackman, though he notes that Pattinson was a little bit inhibited once the karaoke employees started attending to them: “They bring in these boxes, which are basically [full of] dress-up [clothes], and it’s all girls’ clothes. I was a schoolgirl, Baz got dressed up, and Rob did not. He was too cool for school.”

Uhhhhhhh, WHAT? I don’t think that Robert Pattinson was “too cool for school” just because someone randomly walked into your karaoke room, dropped a pile of women’s clothing on the floor, and the two of you (Hugh Jackman and Baz Luhrmann, remember) clearly just IMMEDIATELY picked out your favorite outfits and THREW ‘EM ON. I think Robert Pattinson just knew that was not a thing and that you don’t have to wear girls clothes just because a stranger walked in and also what are you talking about?! Japan was like “GOTCHA!” Or wait. Wait! Have I never done karaoke? Oh nooooooo! Have you guys done karaoke? WHO WERE YOU WEARING?

Comments (19)
  1. Answer: We are all doing Karaoke wrong.

  2. did they leave out the aside where he said he was thankful for the clothes, since he had just peed his pants?

  3. I am only able to sing karaoke if I’m wearing a burlap sack mask, so I know exactly what they were going through.

  4. To me, the most insane part of this story is when Hugh Jackman implies that he got out of his seat to go to the bathroom.

  5. There’s a bit missing from the first part of that story:

    “Once upon a time in 2009, on a fateful flight to Japan, Hugh Jackman noticed that he was on the plane with mussed-head Twilight star Robert Pattinson. “I didn’t talk to him at all on the flight, because he’s this really tall guy with a hood over his head literally, and every time I’d go to the bathroom, I’d be like, ‘Man, that guy takes some serious sleeping pills,’ because this was him [slumps over] the whole time,” says Jackman, though he notes that Pattinson was a little bit inhibited after seatmate Gerard Depardieu had a skirmish with the flight attendant. “Gerard was saying ‘Je Urineaux, et Tu Urineaux’ and so I was peein’ and Gerard was [Ur-a-]Peein’, and Rob did not. He was too cool for school.”

  6. Oh, man. Last night I went out to eat at an actual proper restaurant and they had karaoke going on up by the bar. The owner (impressed?) told me that this was the first night they ever did it, and that they thought it might be a fun thing for Tuesday nights. It was not. In fact, I’m pretty certain it was keeping people from coming inside. So, if any of you are restaurant owners, take heed: listening to people do karaoke while you’re eating dinner does not positively enhance the experience.

  7. My friend has a story that begins with going to a karaoke place and ending with inadvertently getting a prostitute WITH NO REAL STEPS IN BETWEEN (IT WAS A KARAOKE BROTHEL), so I now vaguely expect all karaoke adventures to turn weird.

  8. Care-a-oh-PEE. Thank you.

  9. The last time (n=4) I went to karaoke, two twins who must have weighed, combined, and this is not hyperbole, 700 pounds*, did “Total Eclipse of the Heart” BACK TO BACK. Literally, both of them went up there, sang the song together, and then because they submitted two different slips, both of them sang it together again. Needless to say, I haven’t been to karaoke since.

    *Their weight is afield of the point, but I think it adds color to the story.

  10. Oh god I love this site so much it hurts. I want to go to this night SO BAD. What was in the box of clothes?!?!?! I can GUESS, but my guess cannot nearly compensate for the Japan ?!?!?! ness that just is. What’s in the box???? What’s in the BOX?!?!? (Brad Pitt ‘Seven’ impression).

  11. Karaoke in Japan is the best. You get your own room, so you don’t need to sing in front of strangers, and most places have good “All You Can Drink” deals, where they keep the beer and Calpis Sours coming. A lot of places do have costumes and wigs you can wear (which you will do, eventually. See: “All You Can Drink”).

  12. Normal star/drunk behavior. Nothing to see here.

    Hmm.
    Star behavior = drunk behavior.
    Therefore, all who are drunk BEHAVE like stars.
    Hunh.
    I’m sure there’s something I’m forgetting…

  13. Karaoke bars always make me feel embarrassed, even just thinking about people I know doing karaoke makes me feel embarrassed. However, doing it in dress-up makes it less embarrassing for some reason ((?)).

  14. Oh, Wolverine…

  15. That’s a really boring story Hugh Jackman

  16. I agree. Must be drunk to do karaoke right. Also it helps not to close your eyes when you sing. It makes it seem like you are trying too hard. This chick has some funny karaoke tips… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0Zpk8AMlLI

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