Almost all of us loved Drive. It was a fun and exciting and disgusting and Ryan Gosling is very nice to watch in a movie. Every single human knows that about him. When he asked the little kid if he wanted a toothpick? Give me a break. When he said his car didn’t have wheels? Come on. But another thing that was great about Drive was Ryan’s scorpion jacket. “An instant classic.” We even learned all about it in this interview with the designer, remember? And probably 80% of all men (or women! or women.) left the movie theater wanting to own that jacket. And now they can! From the Daily Mail:

The scorpion-motif jacket — an integral part of Gosling’s character in the film — may be set to become an cult movie prop, the film gaining rave reviews and an instant fan club since premiering. The off-white varsity-style jacket, embroidered with the yellow insect on its back, is being sold by vintage specialists, Steady Clothing, for $159.99. With a sale date expected on 15th November, the site is now taking pre-orders.

But here’s the thing.

NOOOOOOOOOOOO! DON’T! You are going to look so foolish if you buy this jacket! I promise! Like you’re constantly in a Halloween costume that would be annoying to have on EVEN DURING Halloween. And it won’t even ship until after Halloween! I promise you that you will not look as cool as Ryan Gosling. EVEN IF the jacket would have otherwise made you look cool, which I don’t believe it would have because it is a shiny white silk jacket with a scorpion on it, you will not look cool because you will be wearing a MOVIE PROP and everyone will be aware of that. So, your mission is simple. Just don’t buy it! Put your $159.99 back into your overflowing money clip and pretend like you never even saw it. Maybe try searching for something like this. Don’t you feel better? I feel better. (Via FilmDrunk.)

Comments (37)
  1. Wait! Don’t buy a Drive jacket? Shit.

  2. Almost bought it but then realized that everyone who didn’t also buy it would think I was a loser and I would only be able to socialize with other people who had also bought the jacket like a really cool, stylin version of the untouchable caste.

  3. Uh, Kelly? The first result in the Google search for “cool non-movie jackets” is an article entitled “The Eight Most Iconic Cinematic Jackets … and Where to Get Them.”

    Wait, I can buy a Rockateer leather jacket?!?! Screw this Drive nonsense. The Rockateer jacket!!!

  4. “So foolish,” my furry blue ass.

  5. When I was four-years-old the only thing I wanted in the world was a red jacket. Because the Karate Kid had a red jacket. I thought that if I had a red jacket I would be good at karate.

    The four-year-old in me wants to by this jacket because it thinks that if I buy it I’ll be good at driving and not talking.

  6. I will accept this compromise, so long as everyone realizes that they will have to pry my driving gloves from my cold, dead hands.

  7. But it’s such a Fly jacket!

  8. Finally! I’ve been waiting for the perfect jacket to wear with my Titanic “Heart of the Ocean” pendant and my “One Ring”.

  9. Someone has to point out that SCORPIONS AREN’T INSECTS and it might as well be me. #arachnidgum

  10. Yeah, Well people told me not to buy Michael Jackson’s Captain Eo jacket.
    They also told me not to invite children around to my house to get drunk with my chimpanzee, and in retrospect they were probably right about that.

  11. Um if you are trying to tell me not to live out my lifelong dream of wearing this jacket (I’d prefer the one Ryan actually wore but we don’t need to go into why…) then you are not a real hero or a real human being Kelly.

  12. What about scorpions in the back of dress shirts, those are still cool, right?

  13. I’m saving my money for a Ron Perlman face.

  14. Look at this forum! I bet all these guys went out and bought jackets:

    http://filmjackets.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=16&t=3044&start=0

  15. I respectfully disagree. I’m gonna get the jacket, lock it up in the vault, and ten years later start wearing it, and everyone will be super impressed, and that’s just how it’s gonna be, dudes.

  16. They’re arachnids, not insects. BOYCOTT!

  17. You’d have to be a real pathetic idiot to walk around in a Drive jacket. So lame, nowhere near as cool as my Batman Begins armored bodysuit that I wear to work.

  18. Yeah you are saying exactly right because when i watch the movie Drive i love the scorpion Jacket but i have found that this jacket has not getting good reviews and then i have decided that it will only look perfect on Ryan Gosling and also made for him.

    http://www.amazon.com/ryan-gosling-drive-scorpion-jacket/dp/b00aynurtc

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