• Here’s Leslie Knope talking about that Parks and Recreation book we talked about briefly last week. Great. -EW
  • Umm, want to read a kind of NSFW story that Jason Bigg’s wife wrote about when she paid a professional to do something to her husband? No? God no, but for some reason you know you’re going to read it anyway? Yeaaah. -FilmDrunk
  • Martha Stewart’s daughter wrote a tell-all book and I guess Martha Stewart pees with the door open? Maybe we should turn off the Internet and go to bed for the rest of the week our lives. -TheSuperficial
  • Hey remember when Melissa McCarthy chugged ranch dressing on SNL last night? Here are more people doing that! Hooray! -TheDailyWhat
  • Jenna Fischer had a baby! Yay, Jenna Fischer! His name is Weston! I don’t really like it but it’s not terrible! -JustJared
  • Want to guess who Kristen Stewart’s first celebrity crush was? I’ll give you a moment to guess before you click the link. Ok. Have a guess? Can’t wait to compare later, no cheating. -Celebuzz
  • In honor of Breaking Bad‘s Gus, Salon has put together a list of Hollywood’s creepiest psychopaths. Don’t know why Vinent Gallo’s not on there but hey not EVERY list can be exactly correct. -Salon
  • Elliott Kalan, comedian and Daily Show writer, would like to replace Andy Rooney. But HE NEEDS YOUR HELP! -KalanIsRooney
  • Speaking of Andy Rooney, why not enjoy one last Andy Rooney Game. RIP. -JoeMande
  • Did you know James Franco’s character was supposed to die in the last Planet of the Apes movie? Now you know! How do you feel? Please, let’s talk about how you feel. -THR
  • Oooh, also, did you know that the kid from the upcoming Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close movie was also on Child Jeopardy once? NOW YOU KNOW AGAIN! -Movieline
Comments (7)
  1. Sorry Elliott Kalan, but someone else already has my support #birdie4rooney

    • Elliott Kalan is funny, but he’s no true 63-year-old curmudgeon!

      #gabeforrooney

      • He’s no Gabe, but he does have a hilarious podcast called “The Flop House”, which is like my favorite podcast. Go listen to that, it’s like the Hunt for the Worst Movie in audio form, but with more movie mash-ups and Ducktales and softcore porn trivia. Your earholes will love it!

    • But he is right, I would buy premade sandwiches, but they always have at least one topping that makes them something I would never make for myself, or want to eat. It’s like those people who order pizzas for a conference or other large group, and don’t just go with straight pepperoni, and some vegetarian alternative. They make sure that everyone is probably picking at least one topping off their pizza.

  2. “Fuck you, Kelly.”
    -Notsewfast

  3. I guessed Leo for K.Stew’s crush. Her actual answer actually gave me more respect for her, though.

  4. Now that I know James Franco’s character was supposed to die in The Rise of the Planet of the Apes, he has died. In my mind. And will always have been have died.

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