I don’t really understand the hype that surrounds actresses when they become “the new Bond girl” because I’m not 70 years old and I didn’t grow up in a time where you were only allowed to see one girl every five years. There are hot girls all over the place now, it’s insane. Bond girls are to exciting hot girls what print media is to the internet. Nevertheless, the new Bond girl, Olga Kurylenko, is very hot. She is also a huge threat to the future of communism, says the Communist Party of St. Petersburg. From Yahoo!:

New Bond Girl Olga Kurylenko has been getting all sorts of attention recently from Hollywood producers, magazine editors and legions of drooling fanboys. The Ukrainian actress, who plays a Bolivian secret agent opposite Daniel Craig’s 007 in “Quantum Of Solace”, has also gained ire of the Communist Party of St. Petersburg, which in an open letter on its website condemned her for aiding “the killer of hundreds of Soviet people and their allies.” The group’s statement describes 007 as “a man who worked for decades under the orders of Thatcher and Reagan to destroy the USSR.”

LOLZ. It’s interesting that they descrbied 007 as “a man who worked for decades under the orders of Thatcher and Reagan to destroy the USSR,” because I had always described him as “A FICTIONAL CHARACTER WHO DOESN’T EXIST GROW UP.”

Actually, I was going to give the Communist Party of St. Petersburg the benefit of the doubt and accept that it might seem like a subtle act of treason to star in a movie franchise that represents the uncompromising arrogance of a political philosophy completely at odds with your own world view. But then I read this:

The Communist Party of St Petersburg, a splinter group of the second largest political party in the Russian Duma, has made headlines earlier in the year when it denounced “Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull” as crude anti-Soviet propaganda and called actors Harrison Ford and Cate Blanchett “capitalist puppets.”

Haha. Harrison Ford and Cate Blanchett ARE capitalist puppets, but the Communist Party of St. Petersburg needs to CHILLAX.

Comments (6)
  1. After this, where is the line? Will Neo-Nazis complain about the next World War II movie?

  2. Ha Ha, the soviet union is your boyfriend.

    Between this and “Night Court” being back on the air, it really is 1989 all over again.

  3. Mary Mouse  |   Posted on Nov 24th, 2008 -4

    Gabe, can you explain something about Olga Kurylenko, please? I didn’t understand why they kept showing that she had some kind of burn/scar on her back in the movie and then never explained it. Was it because her character supposedly escaped from a fire when she was a child? I am very slow on the uptake when it comes to Bond movies!

  4. Match the Bond to its tag line.

    A) 2008′s Quantum of Solace
    B) 1989′s License to Kill
    1) Out for revenge.
    2) Bond is back.

  5. edc  |   Posted on Dec 8th, 2008 0

    you said lolz and grow up in the same article.
    what a dill.

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.