point_break_remake

Do you guys ever get worried that Hollywood will suddenly start generating new material and that not every single movie will be some gently reheated nostalgic throwback property from yesteryear gussied up in a hot new outfit 3 tha kidz? I mean, that hasn’t happened yet, and they aren’t, and every movie is, but do you ever worry? Yeah, me neither. From the HollywoodReporter:

Point Break, the 1991 thriller set against the world of surfing, is getting an extreme-sports make-over, courtesy of Alcon Entertainment and Warner Bros.

In the original film, directed by Kathryn Bigelow, Keanu Reeves starred as Johnny Utah, an undercover FBI agent looking for a gang of bank robbers, led by Patrick Swayze’s Bodhi, amid the Southern California surfing scene. The new version, with a screenplay by Kurt Wimmer (Salt), will be set in the world of international extreme sports and also involve an FBI agent infiltrating a criminal ring.

“The world of international extreme sports”? What the hell is that? Seriously, is international extreme sports even still a thing outside of Red Bull commercials? I hope that the FBI agent in the remake has to travel back in time to 1994 and stop Evil Dan Cortese. “Sick Shaun White cameo, bro!” And 100 Mickey Mouse Bucks says there is at least one “no gi” cage fight in this movie that ends in a gogoplata. So extreme. So booooooo! Tres le booooooo! (Very international.)

Comments (35)
  1. I hope they keep the Silly Name Generator for this one and have a protagonist called Zach Oregon.

  2. ABWASS

    Always be wearing a squirrel suit.

  3. Anthony Keidis can make a cameo again!

  4. Pimp My Break.

    X to the Z to star in the Swayze role.

  5. It would only be better* if it starred the Mountain Dew EXTREME commercial dudes. They were some cool* dudes

    *barf

  6. Dream cast: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Michele Rodriguez, Jordana Brewster

  7. At the end of the movie, Bodhi based jumps off a skyscraper into a tornado, never to be seen again.

  8. Just to get serious for a moment – Point Break is not a good movie. I am totally fine with Hollywood remaking not-great movies, because sometimes the remakes are not bad – The Fly is one of my favourite movies ever, and that was a remake of an actually not-bad movie.

    So, I dunno…even if it’s a terrible remake, well – who cares. Keanu and Swayze were not exactly pointbreaking the acting bank in this (R.I.P Dalton Roadhouse) the whole plot is kind of stupid and full of holes, and really – as long as this acts as a diversion to keep them away from Back to Future, then all the better.

    • Howard Hawks said a great film has at least three perfect scenes and no bad ones.

      An incomplete list of perfect scenes in Point Break:

      - footchase ending with Johnny Utah emptying his clip in the air
      - Johnny Utah jumping out a plane without a parachute, catching Bodie on the way down and having a stand-off with a gun while having a conversation
      - anything with Gary Busey

      the point is, Hawks would have “emptied his clip in the air” after watching this film. It should not be underestimated.

      • I’m still not sold, and this is coming from a guy that empties his clip every Sunday afternoon after his weekly viewing of Fried Green Tomatoes.

        Anyways, I don’t disagree that PB is entertaining as hell. But it’s not sacred.

        • Not sure why you’re being downvoted. As a PB fan — I think it’s fantastically paced and energized throughout, though of course equal parts laughable — I have absolutely zero emotions about a remake. It affects the original not one bit. I don’t know why people think it’s such a violation. Anyway, after Psycho was remade it became clearly that no film is beyond the reach of the remake machine. Who knows, my kids might one day buy tickets to a Pulp Fiction remake.

          • It’s Point Break! The downvotes are surprising.

            Completely agree – I love me some Saturday TBS bleeped out Point Break action, for sure! But like…I don’t care about it.

            I stress though about hearing “Matthew Lillard, Skeet Ulrich and Jamie Kennedy are: The Clockworks Oranges. (Whatever, you all still wish it were 1996 too.)

          • I am an F.B.I. agent.

            djfreshie, you’re under arrest. Point Break is amazing.

      • Busey’s love of meatball subs and Calvin and Hobbes is enough to vault this film into the “classics” category. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYi0a8ZpNBk) It is a perfect scene, much like the one where Johnny buys roses for Lisa in The Room.

        “(Crazed laugh) This Calvin and Hobbes is funny!”

        “Utah! Get me two!”

    • But doesn’t that just make it all the more ridiculous that it’s being remade? Sure, the acting might (MIGHT) be better this time, but a stupid plot’s a stupid plot, even if it’s set on a bmx track instead of a beach, right?

      • I said the same thing about the Karate Kid (that remaking a mediocre movie is ridiculous), and it turned out, I did not care at all in the end either way. I had no opinion of that stupid remake, which was probably terrible and unnecessary. I will have no opinion of this remake either unless it turns out to be amazing (totally tubular) which we won’t know until it’s done.

        Though, I suppose clearly, “From the screenplay mind of the guy who wrote Salt” is not a good omen.

  9. In a pivotal bank robbing scene, Johnny texts “little hand sez its t1me 2 rock lol”

  10. I hope they cast Jake Busey in the Gary Busey role.

  11. The article I saw said it was infiltrating the world of extreme couponing and was based on the movie Price Break.

  12. The only positive thing I can see with this is a resurgence in sales of Bush, Palin, Clinton, and Obama Halloween masks.

  13. Odd Future will appear as a gang of black separatist snowboarders.

  14. Maybe they can cast Vin Diesel and reuse scenes from xXx to save themselves some money…. IN THIS ECONOMY.

  15. This remake better be set in 2041 so they can feature the 50-year Storm again

  16. “i’m pretty much remaking ‘Gleaming the Cube’” – Kurt Wimmer

    “oooookayyyy……no. we own the rights to Point Break, so let’s call it that.” – movie executive

    They high five. THE END

  17. haha 3 the kids

  18. Jaleel White as Johnny Utah, or no deal.

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