You gotta trust daddy, who may or may not have the time to explain it to you. OBEYING CAN BE FUN! But let’s also put the emergency phone numbers on the fridge, just in case daddy gets real busy. (Via ChristianNightmares.)

Comments (20)
  1. Dammit! This has ruined the title of my porno. Back to the drawing board.

  2. i am a Christian and this horrifies me. im sorry guys.

  3. “So Daddy is Daddy, God is Daddy’s daddy, and God’s primary responsibility as a daddy is pushing Daddy out of the way of traffic. Everyone got it? Good.” – Daddy

  4. I have two reactions:

    1 – it is bad indeed when a group of clowns is not the most terrifying thing in a video; and

    2 – sure, kid, it always starts with something easy and banal like washing apples, but let’s see if you have any better luck with explaining to the judge and jury that the reason for the trail of death and destruction in your wake is simply because ‘daddy said so.’ You see the orange sweater and oily angel and think ‘what’s the worst that can happen?’ but next thing you know you’re snapping the necks of daddy’s enemies with your bare hands. Just you wait.

  5. I like my angels oily, wearing gold lame and Will Riker shit-eating grins.

  6. Daddy says to kill!

  7. “I didn’t understand why I had to wear a tophat and a mustache, but I did it ’cause Daddy said so.”

  8. Now if my Dad ever asks me to do anything, I’m gonna assume it is because he wants to take me to the circus later. Lesson learned.

  9. So if I’m understanding this right, God wants to take me to the circus.
    Seems theologically sound, but WHICH CIRCUS??

  10. Okay, a hypothetical – Daddy says one thing, Simon says another. Now what?!

  11. Guess what? There’s a new daddy in town. A discipline daddy!

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