Uh oh, you guys, STORM’S A BREWIN’! Haha. Oh man, this post is already going to be a lot less cute and funny on Monday if people die from Hurricane Irene over the weekend and most of the Eastern Seaboard is laid to soggy waste. Oh well! Don’t blame yourself, Future Gabe, hindblog is 2.0/2.0. (Boooooo!) Anyway, most of us have already stocked up on our emergency provisions, I’m sure. “Wrap the boxes of Totino’s Pizza Rolls in a plastic shopping bag before you put them in the duffel bag with the flashlight and the knife.” But even more importantly: what are we going to watch while we are trapped inside of our homes like so many Billies Corgan? (Despite all his rage, he is still just a rat trapped inside of his home because of Hurricane Irene. Guys, please join our Facebook group if you agree that this is already the best post Videogum has ever done.) Here is a list of suggestions! They are all available on Netflix Insant and you could watch them right now, but why not wait until it’s a real NIGHTMARE outside?!

Note: this isn’t a joke list. This is just a list of really good movies that you may or may not want to watch this weekend if you are trapped during the storm. Some of them, or maybe even most of them, you have already seen, but maybe there is something you haven’t? They’re good! It’s nice to like stuff. Not everything has to be a comical love letter, you know.

Stay safe out there, you guys. Buy extra batteries, they keep saying? I don’t know. Please don’t die!

Comments (88)
  1. The last time I watched Ponyo (a children’s movie featuring tsunamis and fantastical fish creatures), 3 days later, Japan was hit by a punishing tsunami. It was like a really devastating, tragic version of The Ring. Correlation or causation…. you decide.

  2. Additionally, here is a list of movies that I have watched on Netflix Streaming that you guys should avoid at all cost:
    You Again
    The Smiths
    Buttcrack
    Taintlight
    Body Melt
    Timer
    Wristcutters (I do not remember if this was streaming or not, so I’m including it anyway, because ugh, this movie)
    Spread

    • Ugh, ‘Taintlight’. You would think the title might do its job and give me due warning but nope, watched nearly all of that streaming pile of hot garbage. So depressing.

      • It was terrible! It inspired me to start a blog reviewing terrible movies streaming on Netflix, which I did once and then I got distracted by something shiny and forgot all about that thing until just now.

    • You again is on instant watch? Nice!

      • No, not nice! Very, very not nice! Unless the phrase “Jamie Lee Curtis/Sigourney Weaver dance-off” appeals to you for some twisted reason.

  3. Do yourself a favor and watch “Let the Right One In” and not the American remake “Let Me In.” The remake was ok, but the entire time you’re thinking, “Why didn’t I just watch the original? Oh right READING IS DUMB.” That’s you. But reading isn’t dumb, and watch the original Swedish one.

  4. Does anyone really like Gates of Heaven for any reason other than its existence is the reason Werner Herzog once ate his shoe?

  5. with exception to some things already on this list, i have recently watched Le Doulos, the Hit, Lost in America, and the Vicious Kind and they were all good.

  6. I could watch 2001: A Space Odyssey every weekend and be the happiest girl alive!

  7. Hopefully this hurricane will mean that I get to watch four successive seasons of Friday Night Lights (I’m a little behind on my tv watching). Fingers crossed that the power doesn’t go out…

  8. I know Gabe doesn’t like scary movies, and I generally don’t either, but I make the exception for Del Toro. What I’m saying is, are we excited for “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark?” I was, but the advance press isn’t great. Also, I remember reading somwhere that Katie Holmes couldn’t finish the script, so.

    • I am! Guillermo del Toro has a pretty great track record for his movies, so I’m all in for Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark. Negative reviews be damned.

    • JUST WATCH Cronos. ALSO on Netflix, I think. SHIT IS awesome.

      Also, GUILLERMO didn’t make Don’t Have A Similar NAME to A FUCKIN Nickelodeon Show Unless YOU WANNA Confuse me. HE just produced it. SO. whatever.

    • The original is the scariest movie ever made and traumatized me forever. The fact that I was 6 years old when I first saw it probably had something to do with its effectiveness, but I’ve never been able to rewatch it and just looking at stills on Google gives me the shivers.

  9. The Apartment!
    The Sting!
    City of God!
    The BBC update of Sherlock Holmes!

    (I don’t have netflix, so I don’t know if any of these are available, let alone streaming. Sorry.)

  10. I spent an entire non-hurricane weekend binging on the The Guild (complete series). Highly recommended!

  11. for your consideration, female british tv comedy ‘pulling.’ otherwise list is perfect. also? “billies corgan” FTW X 100000000000000!

  12. i live a half a block from the ocean in jersey. i’m going to watch the destruction. let this videogum comment be my legacy!

  13. At the risk of being a giant dork, stay safe everyone! Do you have water? I could mail you water. Also, the original A-Team series is streaming which I am all for right now. For the more discerning viewer, Murder She Wrote is a fine alternative.

    tl;dr I think I skipped becoming my mother and turned right into my grandmother. Figuratively. Not literally. Ew.

    • I like to go with Columbo, a show I did used to watch with my grandmother. Peter Falk 4ever.

    • And this is going to sound silly, but don’t forget beer or your favorite booze. Because when things get rough, you might want a drink. Also, if you’re Jack and in the pilot of LOST you can use that vodka to help clean out your wound.

      But lots of water and gas up your car and powerbars and apples, oranges and candles. And a crank radio. That’s what I keep in my earthquake kits.

      And Crank 2 is streaming, which happens to go really well with beer.

      And, uh, so is Dr. Who because that show is so awesome and starting up again this weekend and I’m trying to mention it every single day.

      And I just learned that season 4 of the O.C. just started its run on SoapNet, which doesn’t help in the hurricane weekend but may help if you’re looking for something to DVR in the afternoon for the next two weeks.

  14. On Netflix Instant watch Sherlock, Luther, and Survivors….all British, suspenseful, and fabulous (although Survivors was cancelled so don’t hold out for further episodes at the end)

  15. FUCK yeah, ROBOCOP. I aint GETTING NO hurricane but I THINK I JUST figured out MY SATURDAY afternoon. FUCK that movie IS PURE awesome.

  16. Everyone please watch Buffalo ’66 and then come back on Monday and talk to me about it.

  17. Well, I’m set.

  18. the cook, the thief, his wife and her lover would send me running screaming into the storm. ugh, that movie!

  19. Maybe I’ll finally sit down and watch Human Centipede, instead of just making jokes about watching Human Centipede.

  20. At the risk of being That Nerd, I would also like to note that the extremely excellent anime Monster is also available in its entirety on Netflix Instant. Because what could be less stressful than watching an involved, intense psychological thriller about the brutality of man, the fragile power of forgiveness, and horrible people setting libraries on fire while a hurricane reshapes the East Coast? I submit to you nothing. Nothing could be less stressful, except for maybe surfing in the Chesapeake Bay tomorrow night. (Please do not surf in the Chesapeake Bay tomorrow night.)

  21. Meanwhile, on the West Coast, I’ll be surfing, going to farmers’ markets, and going wine tasting. Or just write my thesis. Probably that.

  22. also reading the plot on wikipedia. i need that much human centipede.

  23. Every single George Romero movie, it’s a known fact that hurricanes are the leading cause of zombieism

  24. I’m gonna watch me some more Torchwood. The Starz American season. Because it’s super intense!

    • Can you watch that on Starz through Netflix? I can’t find it.

      • You can watch it live through the Starz Live streaming site at netflix. It’s kind of oddly hidden, but you can find a link for it on the Starz Play page. Or a google search will take you right to it.

        The show isn’t streaming on there yet. I don’t know if this is due to the BBC deal with Starz co-financing Torchwood, or if it has to do with the modified deal that Starz has with Netflix after Netflix decided they were going to start producing their own content….

  25. So, uh, anyone watch Uncle Boonmee on Instant yet? Kind of been needing to talk with someone else about ghost monkeys and catfish sex for a week now.

  26. I became addicted to the British TV series Pulling this week. The pilot episode is one of the most perfect examples of dark, uncomfortable, truth-telling comedy I’ve seen. I think the humor is comparable to The Office. It’s not broad like a sit-com and it’s not just dark to be vicious like Nighty Night. And it’s definitely not like Sex & The City, which a lot of people inexplicably compare it to (because women are the primary characters I guess?).

    Also, Preston Sturges! (The Lady Eve, Unfaithfully Yours.)

    And Ernst Lubitsch! (To Be or Not to Be, Heaven Can Wait.)

  27. The Cosby Show on Netflix Instant. So many sweaters. That is all.

  28. Home Movies is on Netflix now. I might rewatch the whole season for the umpteenth time because John Benjamin’s voice never grows old.

  29. I know I’m on the west coast and there is no Irene or even earthquake here, and that it is a work day and I have very important work to do, but you guys I forgot to watch the entire 2nd season of Party Down and look there it is on instant so can I play disaster shut-in with you?

  30. DOGTOOTH

    DOGTOOTH!

    • That movie is so delightfully fucked up.

      • I don’t know if delightful is the right word. I’m pretty sure the day after I watched it, I asked my Greek coworker “what the hell is wrong with you people?” Because seriously, what the hell, Dogtooth?

        • Yeah, stop being original and hilarious, Greek people!

          • I also didn’t realize until after I watched it that it was even supposed to be funny. I suppose I could go back and try to watch it again through that lens, but I doubt I could ever be amused by a father torturing his family.

            I realize that I just don’t get it, I’m not trying to say there’s anything wrong with people who did enjoy Dogtooth*, just that I am definitely not one of them. I was too busy cringing and being horrified to see the humor, I guess.

            *Unlike people who enjoyed Human Centipede. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

  31. i nominate just one: 13 Assassins

  32. Blue Velvet
    Being John Malkovich
    The Hunt for Red October
    Black Hawk Down
    Kick-Ass
    From Dusk Til Dawn
    No Direction Home
    Bowling for Columbine
    The Cove
    Full Metal Jacket
    Gangs of New York
    Gone With the Wind
    Lenny
    Y Tu Mama Tambien
    The Motorcycle Diaries
    The Thin Red Line
    Raging Bull
    Gosford Park
    My Left Foot
    Pollock
    Che
    Mystery Team
    Do the Right Thing
    This is England
    Manhattan
    Best in Show
    Malcolm X
    This is Spinal Tap
    Oldboy
    Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance
    Lady Vengeance
    Shutter Island
    The Machinist
    Memento
    The Conversation
    Gomorrah
    Insomnia
    The Third Man

    • *deep breath*

      Rubber
      Twin Peaks
      Mad Max
      La Femme Nikita
      Reservoir Dogs
      Suspect Zero
      Syria
      The Exorcist
      Clerks
      Trainspotting
      Star Trek
      Pulp Fiction
      Silence of the Lambs
      One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
      Letters from Iwo Jima
      Fawlty Towers
      21 Grams
      The Office
      Parks and Recreation
      Party Down
      Le Cercle Rouge
      Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
      Following
      13 Assassins
      Hobo With a Shotgun
      Birdemic
      The Usual Suspects
      Ronin
      Die Hard (I, II, and III)
      JFK
      LOTR
      Ladron Que Roba a Ladron
      Beer Wars
      Frida
      The Bourne Identity

  33. Great suggestions, you guys. I’m bookmarking this post.

  34. Party motherfrakkin Down (!) … oops, last guy got that… Dron 2nds the motion though.

    Chapelle’s Show (!)

    Monty Python (!!)

    ARCHER (!!! “Who are you supposed to be? Captain Topper Bottoms of the USS Rough Trade?”)

    South Park (ask people which of the later episodes are good though)

    A-level geekery: Battlestar Galactica, Firefly + Serenity, The Guild, Buffy, Angel

    Friday Night Lights: clear eyes, full que, can’t lose
    (FF through anything w/ the flathead guy and pretty blonde in season 2 though)

    Mad Men (watch the first episode, then skip to season 3 if you are a big fan of, how you say?, “plot”)

    Motion pitchers: The Quiet American, Sin Nombre, Silverado, Memento, Pulp Fiction, Network, Best in Show, Red Riding trilogy (not the feel-good trilogy o’ the summer though…), Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Syriana, Time Bandits, Gone with the Wind

    Miniseries: Lonesome Dove, Sherlock, Carlos

    Documentaries: pretty much every good doc ever made, so just check a list or Ebert or somethin’ (and yes, Gates of Heaven rules)

    More solid comedies: Louis, Better Off Ted (v. underrated),

    Ken Burns’ The Civil War (>Sherman’s March)

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