Let’s get ready for cuuuuuuteeee videoooooooooooooooooooooos! Get it? For example, this video. Haha, dog, that cucumber slice is not for you! That is for a human to eat. Do you guys remember the first time you ate a cucumber? I remember the first time I ate one, it was during the summer of 2007. I haven’t eaten them that often since because I don’t like the texture very much, which I think is reasonable.  But man. This dog, right? What a cute dog. A great intro to the next billion animal videos that we’re all going to watch and love together. Let’s get to them!

Here is a gibbon terrorizing a dog in Thailand. The original title of this video where I found it was “Gibbon Plays With Dog.” Hahah, NOT! “NOT!” -Borat. That dog would NOT describe this as a gibbon playing with it, I’m pretty sure. But whatever. At least we get to reap the benefits. At least we get to see a very silly looking gibbon being so annoying to a dog. This is what it’s all about! It being life! This is what life is all about! (Via Abroath.)

The best thing about animals is how absolutely dumb they are. Here’s a cute little Birdie dog being very stupid with itself in the mirror. DON’T YOU SEE THAT THAT DOG MOVES WHEN YOU MOVE? HOW CAN YOU BE SO STUPID? HOW CAN YOU BE SO ADORABLE? (Via HYST.)

Another classic case of a dumb animal just being it’s big old dumb self. Doyoyoy kitty, you can’t get through that glass because it is a solid! Just because stuff looks see-through doesn’t mean that it always IS see-through, that’s the thing that you have to learn. Like when you think a very clean glass cabinate door is open and you try to reach for something in it and you just hit the glass and look like an idiot. But at least in that case you LEARN from your mistakes. You don’t keep reaching for it for TWO MINUTES, YOU DUMB KITTY!

Hahah, I like this video because it is the worst! Very cute, no duh, but also very stupid. If the dog crawled under the chairs EVERY time, THEN we’d have a video. You know? Otherwise we just have a guy having fun with his dog, and it only makes me jealous that I don’t have a dog to run around and be stupid with. Or at least I wish I had a friend who lived close to me who had a dog that I could run around and be stupid with. Anything like that! Please! (Via BuzzFeed.)

This video is like that other video, right? You know what one I’m talking about? I think it was of a cat, and every time the camera would pan away and pan back the cat would be closer? It might have been a dog. Anyway, what was the deal with that video? Was that video real? Does anyone know what I’m talking about? Anyway, this is basically just a not-as-good version of THAT video, but at least I definitely know for a fact that this one is real. Right? Right. (Via TheDailyWhat.)

Hahah, awww. The turtle is so slow but so relentless, I think he will eventually catch up. Turtle videos are becoming much more popular lately, it seems. That’s a trend I’m noticing. Does anyone want to interview me about it? I’m free for interviews. “Turtle videos is the new planking.” – Kelly Conaboy. (Via Urlesque.)

And finally, a cat in zero gravity. I put this one at the end so it would be like that last bit of CBS Sunday Morning where they just show you something nice to look at for a little while and you feel very relaxed. Do you feel relaxed now? Can you go home now and just relax until you have to wake up and do it all over again tomorrow? Great. Have a wonderful evening.

Comments (16)
  1. Dear Eevee,

    Like you, seeing myself in YouTube videos and even in the bedroom mirror made me horribly self-conscious. Even though my roommate would pat my head and call me a good girl, I would still worry about the dog I looked like, and what others would think of me.

    It is important to realise that you have only one body, but several more qualities than just “being cute.” You are active and agile enough to beat the other dogs in the park – take a walk.

    All the best,
    Dr. Birdie

  2. Kelly how did you live 20ish years without eating a cucumber? That’s like Charlie Kelly never eating a strawberry, a blueberry, or a pear.

  3. 30 Days 30 Dogs. Make it happen, Kelly!

  4. The irony* of that turtle video is that the turtle if probably LITERALLY twice as old as the man in the wheelchair.

    *not sure if that’s really what irony means.

  5. i really liked the not birdie video until the owner told me not to hate. don’t tell me what to do, dog owner. and what am i not supposed to hate? is it that your dog has a twitter? because i love that. is it your terrible grammar? because i really hate that phrase and that grammar or maybe

    IT’S MY GODDAMN NEIGHBOR THAT HAS BEEN RIDING AROUND ON AN ELECTRIC SCOOTER SINCE 7 IN THE MORNING AND I AM GOING TO HURT SOMEONE IF HE DOESN’T CUT IT OUT. UP AND DOWN THE FUCKING BLOCK ALL DAY. NO OTHER BLOCKS, JUST MINE. OH AND I THINK THE GUY IS IN HIS 20S OR 30S AND AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

    Does anyone have a bat I could borrow?

  6. I was digging that puppy vs. cucumber video until I heard the one woman with the shaky voice say in Spanish “I’m going to feel very lonely there, daughter.” What the crap’s going on there?! Does Pixar make viral videos now? Please advice.

  7. I like pets and particularly love to watch funny dog videos like Dog In Dress Walks Like People .
    http://funnyandspicy.com/dog-in-dress-walks-like-people-funny-video

  8. This all makes up for the Jim Carrey video, right?

    Also, I NEED to know where the zero gravity cat is. Is she in space? Is she on the Vomit Comet or whatever it is they call the zero-G planes? I need to know! And can I join her there?

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