The first day a movie poster is officially released is a very exciting day in the life of any film fan. What will it look like? Will I like it? Will there be a tagline included? What will the tagline be? Will there be one tagline or will there be a million? Where will it be situated on the poster? Will it be in a readable font? TOO readable? All the usual questions every film fan asks themself before their first official viewing of a movie poster. So you would think that today, the day when the poster for the new Danielle Radcliffe movie The Woman In Black was released, would be an exciting day. That movie actually looks very good I think! Even Gabe said he thought it looked pretty good, and he doesn’t even LIKE scary movies. So SURELY the poster won’t disappoint us, its anxiously awaiting public. RIGHT? COMPUTER? CAN YOU ENHANCE THE POSTER IMAGE FOR ME PLEASE?

Uhhhhhh, WHAT? From my knowledge of the film industry, someone got paid roughly two million dollars worth of prostitutes and cocaine to write that tagline, and THAT’S what we get? “Do you believe in ghosts?” Very insulting. First of all, YES I BELIEVE IN GHOSTS. What do I look like? The biggest idiot? Second of all, that is the laziest tagline I have ever seen! Lazier even than THIS TAGLINE AND ALSO THIS TAGLINE which seemed, up until this moment, like they would be battling each other for the title of Lazy Tagline King forever and ever until they were the only two things left on the planet and they had to repopulate the Earth with lots of even lazier, tiny taglines. Right? That makes sense? Anyway, “Do you believe in ghosts?” could and HAS been the tagline to every single movie about ghosts ever made. Every single one! I’m not going to bother verifying that because that would be an insulting waste of all of our times, but let’s just trust it and move on to the real thing that I’m trying to get to here: Even lazier taglines for The Woman In Black!:

  • Ghosts?
  • What did I just see in my peripheral vision?
  • Ah!
  • GASP!
  • Believe?
  • Do you?
  • Featuring Harry Potter‘s Daniel Radcliffe.
  • Do you believe?
  • Period piece ghost movie.
  • Carriage rides, coattails, and…GHOSTS!
  • This is a scary movie.
  • Are ghosts real or fake?
  • A ghost movie set in the past.

I’m not even sure if these are lazier, but they’re certainly at least JUST as lazy. (Image via PopCultureBrain.)

Comments (67)
  1. “Could you BELIEVE any more in ghosts?”
    -Chandler Bing, tagline writer

  2. Do you believe in life after love?

  3. “Spooky Scary”

  4. Not about wizards

  5. I don’t BELIEVE I will be seeing this movie.

  6. “Do you believe in ghosts, do you believe in ghosts, do you do you do you do you believe in ghosts?”
    -The Cowardly Lion, tagline writer

    • “Do you believe in goths?”
      “He’s a pretty boy, she’s a ghost lady, you figure it out!”
      “Appearing in theaters near you!”
      “Do you believe in ghosts? No? Well they used to, this is a movie about that!”
      “Do you believe in SOUL mates? Nee hee hee hee hee”

  7. Do you BOO-lieve?

  8. “A Ghost Movie With A Wizard”

  9. ooooOOOOOoooooOOOOOOoooooOOoooo

  10. The Woman Wears Black.

  11. “She wears black.”

  12. “Eerie Mood Established By Color Correction And Probably Music”

  13. are ghosts fake?
    (or gay?)

  14. FWIW, going through Kelly’s list and reading “Believe?” followed by “Do You?” just made me choke on my lunch at my desk.

  15. “Remember the move the Others starring Nicole Kidman. Kind of like that.”

  16. I like how it looks as if the ghost face in the poster is saying it and so we can infer that this ghost is really insecure and has some belief issues herself. “Do you believe in ghosts? Do you think I’m scary? Like, just be honest, do you really?”

  17. “Ack!”

    Guess which movie this is a tagline for?

  18. “Once you go black…there’s a woman in it.”

  19. I just noticed on the poster that it’s out in February. That’s always bad news. March release means possibly good. January/February release means high probability of poop.

  20. MS Paint, never stop creating such believable Photoshop substitutes.

  21. It drives me nuts with all of these weird direct address taglines. “Do you believe in ghosts?” Who cares if I do or not? This movie is not about me and whether or not I believe in ghosts we all believe in suspending disbelief for a fictional film! Don’t worry. Let me fix it:

    Do you believe in ghosts have ten bucks and two hours to kill?

    • I too am driven nuts by this. It is as if those tags are saying, “There’s no way we can expect you to have any interest or understanding of anything that isn’t already inside your pea brain, and we don’t even expect you to understand that movies are not about you. But since most people probably DO understand all those things, this tagline actually reveals that we the people behind this movie are idiots. Do you want to see a movie made by idiots?”

    • ur pretty but ur a ghost.

    • Direct address taglines are ok, I recommend always reading them in the voice of Dora the Explorer.

  22. “Get haunted.”

  23. “Have you guys heard of ghosts, hahah, pretty weird stuff!”

  24. He’s Doing this for Street Cred

    • Also, I’m totally seeing this movie, tag line be damned. I saw the play in London (I know, I know, that sounds really douche-y) and it was incredibly scary. I hope the movie is as good.

  25. …or is it dark blue… anyways, she’s real scary…

  26. “You in danger, girl.”

  27. “Insert tagline here.”

  28. Wait, is this finally the much anticipated backstory for Nearly Headless Nick?

  29. Do you believe ghosts has a silent ‘h’?

  30. or to hook in the Harry Potter crowd…
    Do you believe in (Voldemort’s) ghost?

  31. I just saw a tagline of Friends With Benefits: ‘It’s harder than it looks.’ Eeeww.

  32. “Do you like your ghosts victorian not like these modern dumb ghosts who activate your iOuija app and lock your iPhone back to T-Mobile ooeeeeoooAAAhh? You do? Well this is a movie for you!”

    I’m sorry, that’s actually a better tagline. I failed.

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