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Soulja Boy is launching a Make Soulja Boy Go Platinum In A Week Project, or something. The extent of the campaign seems to be this impossibly annoying vlog. Because that’s how you do it. You don’t make good music or have a loyal fan base who will ensure the success of your work. You make a vlog, preferably an unbearable one. That’s how Elvis did it, that’s how the Beatles did it, and that’s how Jay-Z does it.

“Did you buy the new Jay-Z album?”
“No, did he make a terrible vlog desperately bugging me to buy it? If only I had seen that.”

Soulja Boy is so aware of his fleeting fame and wealth that this video would almost be sad if he (and it) wasn’t the worst. And despite his best efforts to “get out the vote” on his new album, he’s clearly staring down the gaping maw of irrelevance and eternal one hit wonder status. He says so himself:

Fuck you, Soulja Boy, you killed hip hop. Soulja Boy, eat a dick. Soulja Boy, you single-handedly killed hip hop, fuck you. Fuck you, Soulja Boy, Collipark shoulda never signed your punk ass. That is why.

Comments (11)
  1. Unfortunately, it seems that only the talented rappers die a premature death.

  2. Soulja Boy isn’t a one hit wonder. Crank Dat was freakishly broke through to extreme success, but among the hip-hop community he had already had quite a few successful songs. It’s like calling Gnarls Barkley a one-hit wonder because the rest of their singles did a tenth of Crazy’s success.

    I mean, he’s no Nas. But he’s definitely been doing good business among his target demographic (ghetto black kids and those that would emulate them) before and after his BIG hit.

    I Got Me Some Bathing Apes, Gucci Bandanna, Donk, Shootout, Yah Bitch Yah, Let Me Get Em- not to mention Booty Meat.

    Also, he’s a funny guy who doesn’t take himself seriously, so I don’t think anyone else should. If you lighten up on him, you might find yourself cracking up at shit like his diss video at Ice T.

  3. Also, hip hop hasn’t been this productive in a very long time because people like Soulja Boy can co-exist with rappers like Lupe Fiasco and Nas and everyone can find their respective success. Sorry, but Hip-Hop Saved My Life does not quite cut it the way Donk does at a dance full of horny teens.

  4. Shootout and Let Me Get Em are the same song. I meant Snap and Roll.

  5. katie  |   Posted on Nov 13th, 2008 0

    i love that none of his reasons involved him saying that it’s a good album.

  6. HIS NECKLACE SAYS YUMS! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!111!!1!

    Soulja boy is to hip hop as Mystery (The Pick Up Artist) is to the human race.

  7. BUT SOULJA BOY. i need to know why! you didn’t say why! how could you leave such a question unaddressed?

  8. SOULJABOYZWIFEY  |   Posted on Jan 29th, 2009 0

    STOP HATIN ON SOULJA BOY CUZ U CAN BE LIKE HIM BITCHEZ

  9. alexis   |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2009 0

    man yall need to leave the dude along he anit did shit to yall

  10. alexis   |   Posted on Apr 18th, 2009 0

    man yall need to leave the dude along he anit did shit to yall

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