In an article titled “What Really Happened to Fired Showrunner Frank Darabont?” in the new issue of The Hollywood Reporter, THR attempts to explain why AMC fired the Walking Dead showrunner halfway through filming the show’s second season a few weeks ago. Remember when that happened? That was weird! The article lists a few main boring possibilities that are mostly only boring and who cares — First, it was too expensive. AMC cut the per-episode budget from $3.4 million to $2.75 million and Darabont didn’t want to cooperate:

Despite the show’s success, AMC stuck to its original position on the second-season budget. When those involved with the show protested that the network was taking chances with its biggest hit, AMC’s head of original programming, Joel Stillerman, is said to have declared, “Ratings have no bearing on this conversation.”

Along with that there is talk of how an episode had footage that was not useable — “dealbreaker” – AMC –and also basically about how Frank Darabont is just a jerk, but pretty much ZzzzZZzzz. And it’s all speculative anyway because it’s a huge mystery, our generation’s greatest mystery, and I’m taking no liberties at all in saying that. So here are some other speculations, JUST AS GOOD, about maybe why he got fired that I’ve put together based on my knowledge of the industry and Frank Darabont and Hollywood and The Walking Dead, a television show (based on true events [?]) that I’ve never seen.

  • Frank Darabont is an alien from outer space. AMC found out that he was an alien from outer space and they weren’t mad because he was an alien, they were just mad that he felt the need to hide the fact that he was an alien. But then they quickly realized that they had to report him to the government. So they did that and then the government maybe murdered him? Or at least they’re keeping him in a lab somewhere for testing. So the Frank Darabont you see now is just an impersonator. And you can’t let just any impersonator be the showrunner for the #1 show in the 18-42 male demographic or whatever, so they had to fire him.
  • Frank Darabont hit on AMC’s 16-year-old daughter. “I didn’t know she was 16! Why do you let her dress like a slutty 27-year-old?!” asked Frank Darabont. AMC didn’t want to hear any of it and they are VERY protective of their 16-year-old daughter (who has definitely slept with like a million old showrunners by now but poor AMC has no idea), so they fired him.
  • Frank Darabont lied on his resume.
  • Frank Darabont is actually very, very scared of zombies. He couldn’t sleep at all through any of the showrunning of The Walking Dead. And when he did sleep, he was plagued by terrible zombie nightmares. “Ya gotta help me out here, AMC,” pleaded Darabont, crying. “I don’t know what to do.” “Why don’t you just quit?” asked AMC. “QUIT?” exclaimed Darabont. “A DARABONT NEVER QUITS!” AMC nodded solemnly.
  • Frank Darabont was getting a little too close with AMC’s latest crush.
  • Frank Darabont made an entire prank episode titled “The Walking Bread.” It was all about zombie bread and it was all stop motion. He really liked it and thought it was cute and funny and in good taste, but AMC was having none of it. Because, first of all, he spent four million dollars on it. Second of all, they thought he was working on an actual episode and now they’re behind schedule. Third of all, he KNOWS that AMC is allergic to gluten and they’re JUST TRYING TO LIVE THEIR LIVES WITHOUT BEING MOCKED.
  • Frank Darabont was upset about something and said he quit and then AMC was like “no takesies backsies” and Frank was like “no but!” and AMC was like “nah-uhhhhh” and Frank was like, “Aw guys c’mon you know I didn’t mean it,” and AMC was like, “Nope, I can’t hear you lalalalala,” and plugged their ears.

I don’t know. Who knows why he was fired? No one knows. Could be any of these.

Comments (35)
  1. Frank Darabont tried too many times to get out of his crib, and pretty much everyone, including AMC, felt it was adorable.

    • But I hear that even though he got fired over it, he ended up signing a deal to appear on MTV Cribs, so it all worked out in the end.

    • “Daradon’t tell me what I Daracan’t do.” – Frank Darabont to AMC

      • but the first season wasn’t really THAT good anyway, was it? I mean, let’s be honest here. Sure, it had some good parts, SOME. But the acting, hammy, the writing, trite at times. I kinda expected more. Am I wrong? It was a very short season, I still held out hope it would get better.

  2. He was fired because he wasn’t willing to compromise and take the show in a new direction. Now that he’s gone, they can finally seal the deal with Razor Scooters and change the title to The Rolling Dead.

  3. Someone accidentally called him Frank Oz, and he went ballistic, even though Frank Oz is the best and it was the biggest compliment

  4. I have never seen Walking Dead, and I don’t know anyone who watches it. For all I know, it doesn’t really exist. I feel like it’s just one of those things that media people chatter about even though nobody outside of the industry cares. So I guess what I’m saying is that he got fired because AMC couldn’t justify continuing to pay someone to run a show that likely does not exist.

    • I know someone who watches it. She also enjoyed the second Transformers movie and has never seen an episode of Community. I hate her.

    • It does exist! Now you have to worry about what all those method actors are going to do with their spare time

    • I know someone who was a zombie extra on it. Well, he himself is still alive. So he was technically hired as an extra, and the part he was asked to play was a zombie. What I’m trying to say is, I know one of the background zombies. #namedrop #actuallynonamesweredropped #shit #wrapitupMailman #clickingSubmitnow

  5. 2.75 million dollars per episode?!

    Man, the Walking Dead is making it braaaaaaiiiiiiins.

  6. I think Darabond was fired because he spent all his time locked away in his trailer stroking his Robot Pillow.

  7. He realized there was more money/interest in robot chefs

  8. I don’t know. What do you think, Carl?

    I see… Well… uh… I’m gonna go, ok?

    Ok… Bye!

    ::runs::

  9. Speaking of zombie bread, what do zombie vegetarians say?

    A: GRAAAAAAINS

  10. He was like “Alright, I’m done cashing in on this Zombie thing. Time to get out before the backlash.”

  11. Frank Darabont and AMC actually went to high school together, and Frank Darabont used to lock AMC in the janitor’s closet and give it swirlies and pants it in front of its crush, and the crush would laugh and link arms with Frank Darabont and they would walk off to Frank’s convertible, and they would get in by jumping over the sides instead of opening the doors because doors are for squares. Anyway, fast forward some time, AMC is in showbiz and comes across Darabont’s resume, and extends an offer, and Darabont is all like “Hey AMC! Long time, man. You look old! Ha, just kidding man, remember High School? That was the best?” and AMC is all like *twitch*. But just when you think that bygones are bygones, BOOM! FIRED! No one gives AMC a swirlie! NO ONE!

  12. Didn’t this “Kelly” person also say she/he has not seen the Wire, in addition to not seeing Walking Dead? Priorities are apparently just like miracles and magnets in that SOMEONE doesn’t know how they work

  13. Frank Darabont felt it necessary to include a 4 episode story arc about Prozack and its numbness. FIRED!

  14. Darabont: How can you be so obtuse?
    AMC: Nothing stops. Nothing… or you will do the hardest time there is. In The Killing writers room. No more protection. I’ll pull you out of that one-bunk Hilton and cast you down with the Sodomites on Bravo. We’ll have us a little Walking Dead script barbecue in the yard. They’ll see the flames for miles. We’ll dance around it like wild zombie! You understand me? Catching my drift?… Or am I being obtuse?

  15. The alien/impersonator theory is really the only one that passes the Occam’s razor test.

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