As you may have heard, Charlie Sheen’s character will be killed off on the season premiere of Two and a Half Men, and now TMZ knows what happens to him. SPOILER: it includes the phrase “meat explosion.” Not joking.

Comments (31)
  1. I am definitely going to watch the first episode of the season. It will be the only episode I have ever PLANNED to watch, and I will hate myself for it, but I already know it’s going to happen.

  2. “Charlie Harpers train was shot down under the Streets of Paris… it spun in. There were no survivors.”

  3. Is it just me being sensitive (it’s not) or is it incredibly fucked up to imply your mentally-ill character got away with a disturbingly violent murder on your sitcom for children and morons?

    • I am actually not that upset by this, mostly because this SHOULDN’T be a show for children. I’m sure lots of children watch it, but that doesn’t mean that they SHOULD. It’s a show for (stupid) adults, and (stupid) adult situations are fully acceptable.

      • Oh, I didn’t mean literal children; rather adults with a childlike sense of what is Right, what is Wrong, and what is Funny.

        hotspur put my gripe really well down there. It’s an issue of tone, and while blood and guts strewn everywhere for laffs fits in fine in, like, Evil Dead: The Musical (which is fantastic and hilarious and y’all should see it), it’s not really appropriate for a CBS sitcom about wacky misogyny and Jon Cryer’s emasculation.

  4. They should have titled that article: “One and a Half Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Topping?”

  5. “Meat explosion” sounds like a choice of toppings at a pizza chain.

  6. Choice TV Show Writing: Two And A Half Men

  7. fake heaven population: 2. charlie sheen’s character on two and a half men, and my grandmother who everyone in her own family even thought was a cold, heartless old biddy.

  8. “I have to go now, my planet needs me.”

  9. I am a little disappointed that they did not just go completely overboard. I mean, meat explosion is kind of overboard, but I was hoping that there would be bear attacks, bees, spontaneous human combustion, eagle attacks, and then meat explosions. A rare miss, whatever network airs this show!

  10. Somewhere Ron Swanson is cursing that this “Meat Explosion” is not the older brother burrito to the “Meat Tornado” burrito.

    • I thought I’d click through and read about him dying of eating too many burritos, so we’re on the same page (either you and me, or me and Ron Swanson. Not sure which).

  11. I like the mental image of a troubled comedic actor getting hit by a train and becoming a “meat explosion.” That is not at all a horrifying, stomach-churning event to haunt your nightmares forever. Nope, it is tonally perfect for a lightweight comedy about two brothers and a child.

  12. That character has a long “Eulogy Writing” career ahead of her. Expositional dialogue is usually a very good and not at all redundant and painful way to talk about how a person died and is now why we are all here at this funeral. Cuz just in case, you know?

    • I kinda just gave myself an idea of writing a TV show where the characters only talk in expositional dialogue. Basically it’s would be “The Conversation That Never Started”, all anyone would ever do is give background info on what they are about to, but never can, say. My God, the possibilities are endless! Anything that seems out of character or strange can be expositioned away. If Johnny dies in a mine in Bolivia and that sounds weird because Johnny was a Dentist in New York City for the last 6 years and usually spent all free time with his family and isn’t even from Bolivia or a miner, it’s not weird at all because “do you remember the time Johnny used to tell us about how his Dad helped fund the contrators that built the mines in Bolivia and always wanted to take Johnny there to see them up close but then his Dad died? Well after his Dad died Johnny thought going to see the mines up close would bring him closure, but wound up slipping and falling in!”. Other guy: “No I wasn’t aware of any of that Dad stuff, but this all makes sense now and is airtight!, but it is weird that I was hanging out with him all last weekend and we are best friends and he didn’t say this stuff at all.” Great show.

      • While I’m at it, I watched the Dark Knight the other day and it has a pretty great expositional(?) moment when the lawyers tell each other what a RICO case is and get excitied. The best part is the one who didn’t think of making a RICO case is the one who excitedly explains what a RICO case is.

  13. Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t Louie already witness a meat explosion a couple episodes back before he met that girl at the movie theater?

  14. strike test

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