Obviously, we are all very excited about this Sunday’s premiere of the 8th and final season of The Entourage. All of our old favorite pals are back for one last hurrah! Personally, I am most excited to hear what kind of hate-filled, homophobic tirade Ari Gold unleashes on Lloyd! Hahhaa, those are the best, so funny and cool. The gang got together this morning (you know, I bet those guys have fun when they’re off camera too! Just hanging out and trading wild stories about medical marijuana brownie recipes and empty relationships with emotionally desperate women, so fun!) and made an appearance on the Today Show with some touching memories of what a wild ride this has been as well as some exciting revelations about the upcoming season. From TheTodayShow.livejournal.com:

The cast of the HBO dramedy visited TODAY Tuesday morning to tease one big reveal, share their thoughts about the upcoming season and deliver the future forecast for the ensemble effort.

As for that reveal, it’s a doozy. After seven long years of tounge-in-cheek mystery, fans will soon learn the show’s biggest secret — the name of Ari’s wife!

“You know, I can’t tell you,” actor Jeremy Piven told Matt Lauer when asked about Mrs. Ari. But he soon he assured the host that “(her name) will be revealed within the first few episodes.”

WHOA STOP THE PRESS VICKI VALE I’M GONNA BUST THAT BODY OH YEAH! What? Are you kidding me? TELEVISION’S MOST BURNING QUESTION IS FINALLY GOING TO BE ANSWERED! These guys know what I’m talking about. WHAT IS IN MRS. ARI GOLD’S NAME HATCH?! So exciting. Goosebumps, you guys, goosebumps, I’m sure. What do you think it will be? Here are my guesses:

  • Arie
  • Maseratina
  • Cocainey
  • Judy Drama
  • Sasha Grey Sr.
  • Kelly Bong Ripsa
  • Aquawoman
  • Medellina
  • Harvey Weinstein
  • Sarah
  • Turtle

YOU COULD CUT THE TENSION ON A MIRROR WITH A RAZOR BLADE.

Comments (56)
  1. #Birdie4AriGold’sWife’sName

  2. Mercuria Gold

    “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! HISS!!!!!!!!” -You Guys

  3. My money’s on Rold.

  4. Ariel, duh

  5. TWIST: It’s Misa Sari. We’ve known her name all along!

  6. Dr. Jacqueline Shepard Gold. Basically because nothing on this show is real and hopefully they have all been dead the whole time.

  7. Entourage is great television, apparently. Emmanuelle Chriqui tells us that her character “Sloan” is a stong woman that is even-keeled and confident. Wow, there’s so much subtext to her character that I didn’t catch at first glance. Like in that scene from last season when she tries anal sex with Eric. She was totally even-keeled right there. I used to think of this show was like a Sex and the City for frat boys, but I guess I just don’t get the subtext sometimes.

  8. Aurica Finger

  9. An M. Night Shyamalan Film

  10. I feel like I’ve been to the desert on her.

  11. since this is entourage we’re talking about here, i’m guessing her name is either gayjoke gold or rooftopbar gold.

  12. This morning Ann Curry was talking about how her 6 year old son got up early to watch the interview because he loves Entourage. Oh really, Ann Curry? You let your 6 year old watch this show?

    Also, I’ve watched all the seasons of Entourage, and never once did I notice that she didn’t have a name.

  13. Is it weird that I’ve watched this show since the first season, like literally used to have viewing parties where all my friends got together and watched it together and ate nachos and pizza bagels and sushi platters, and I did not realize that we had not been told her name? Didn’t even think about it once. Didn’t know it was even a thing. Didn’t know people were wondering! Had no clue!

  14. My money’s on Kosmo.

  15. After Vince gets out of rehab (or whatever happens I don’t care) Vince, Drama and Ari will all share their craziest coke-fueled shenanigans. Ari trumps Drama’s story about the time he totally bumped a line off of Tiffani Amber Thiessen’s tits at the lot where Saved by the Bell was filmed (Drama has a cameo as a substitute teacher) by regaling everyone in the story of how he tricked his wife into legally changing her name to Mrs. Ari during a crazy coke party(?) at Clarence Thomas’ house

  16. for the most part i enjoy entourage.

    because i’m a douchebag, you see.

  17. ha! isn’t it SO FUNNY [!] how we haven’t even bothered to name the only regular female chcaracter?* Oh, man! we are so clever! Let’s just call her “Harpie”

    *i’m guessing here, but she has to be

  18. Wow – it really is Sex and the City for guys! Like how we never know Mr. Big’s name. It will turn out to be Jane. Or Sarah. V. exciting.

  19. I have watched every episode of this show (oops!) and i had no idea that we didn’t know Ari’s wife’s name. The show’s biggest secret indeed!

  20. Gwyneth Paltrow’s Head

  21. on a semi-related note: perrey reeves should be elected the mayor of swoon city. hubba hubba!

  22. Spicy Tuna Roll

  23. Weird choice, putting a low-res Entourage opening video from 2006 there.
    I think Gabe is trying to tell us that her name is hidden somewhere in the opening sequence.

    Wouldn’t it be fun if she was called MRS. ENTOURAGE?

  24. I have never watched Entourage and never ever will. THAT SAID, my money is on “Bitch Duck.”

  25. Totally bizarre note, but in the original, Noah Baumbach directed film “Kicking and Screaming” you can see the actress topless and college aged. I think that every time I see her.

  26. Mercury

  27. Mrs.

    (And no, there’s no joke there. Her first name is Mrs., because it’s not like the female characters on this show get to think about better career arcs or have lives not defined by their relationships with men.)

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