One thing that people really like — significant others especially, but also just people in general — is when you, out of love, annoy them incessantly. It’s adorable and endearing and charming and no one ever has any problems with it. Are you doing it just to get a reaction? Are you doing it because you’re bored? Are you doing it because, I don’t know, you just can’t hold it in for some reason? It doesn’t matter. The important thing is that you’re doing it and everyone loves it. Like the puppy in this video, you keep pressing, letting your actions build and build on the person at which they’re aimed until they’re forced to pay attention to you, even though maybe it is the last thing they want to do because they’ve learned that if they just ignore you, you eventually stop.

Awwww, puppy! You’re the best. You are adorable and you have won us all over, especially your cat friend, unless he actually kills you at the end, it is kind of unclear. Here are some other proven ways to get people to like you:

  • When they yawn and have their eyes closed, put your finger in their mouth. Every time, even though they’ve sincerely asked you to stop doing that many times in the past.
  • Make lots of sound effects for whatever they’re doing.
  • Suggest, over and over again, that they just throw anything they’re having a problem with in the garbage.
  • Sing a large portion of a popular song and then just when they think you’ve stopped, continue singing it.
  • If you’re at a store with them, pick up every item and ask if they want it.
  • If you’re at a store with them, pick up every item and ask if they’d like you to buy it for them.
  • Make weird sounds.
  • Answer their questions way before they finish the question. And then maybe after they’ve finished the question, repeat the joke answer you gave when you interrupted them and insist that that is the correct answer.
  • Insist that you don’t know what they’re talking about, when obviously you know what they’re talking about.
  • If they accidentally do something that could have hurt you physically but it didn’t, really act like it hurt you a lot.
  • If they tell you not to do something, you ask, “Wait. DON’T do it, or DO do it?”
  • If they tell you a long story, respond only by referencing something in pop culture that has the same word in it as one of the last words they said. This one might be difficult so I’ll give an example. Say they tell you a long story that ends in the sentence: “So yeah, I don’t know, I just figured I’d lend a hand because they’be done so much for me in the past. It’s the least I can do, really.” You respond with, “Cool Hand Luke.”

I could go on and on, really. It’s an endless list. (Via VVV.)

Comments (31)
  1. RIP, dog. You were just being the cooler of the two animals in that room, but that humorless sourpuss put an end to you. You will be missed.

  2. Annyong!

  3. I just want to point out how nice that kitty is. What a patient kitty…

    wait…. omg is she crushing that puppy’s throat? (turn off projector) Well…. as you can see, class, that kitty was being really nice, and there was no malice involved whatsoever.

  4. Addition to the list of annoying: Repeating everything you say. Not funny little brother! Just cut it out!

  5. If any of you j-holes were still on the fence about Kelly and that list didn’t plant you firmly on team KELLY4LIFE then I don’t even know why you’re here.

    TEAM KELLY4LIFE!

  6. Vampire cat, vampire cat! Watch out puppy, you’re soon to be a vampire puppy!

  7. I used to annoy my sister by talking to her in a Music Man voice, repeating certain words and doing it all in a Jaunty Rhythm. Por Ejemplo:
    “Where am I going, You ask? To the store. To the store, I go and what do you know, it’s a pet store. Pet store? pet store, see, and I”m going to buy me a chimpanzee!… Whatdya Talk Whadtya Talk.”

  8. This was just a very cute alternate ending to the pillow suffocation in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, right? D’awww, Randle McPuppy.

  9. I am currently sitting in an orientation lecture, and a big important oral surgeon is talking to us about something pretty serious, and i just laughed pretty loud in his big important face. So, you know, thanks a million Kelly.

  10. Dear Puppy,

    I can see that you really do love your roommate, despite the way your friendly demeanour turns into physical altercations. I know that the “War on Cats” is particularly extreme, but I feel that a two-domesticated animal solution is so hard to implement, especially when I read letters from you.

    My advice? Stay away from your roommate. Have a nap.

  11. You guys I am never hanging out with Kelly.

    • Though I should thank her, she did just give me all the ammo ever to get my little brother back for the whole “lick all my stuff” phase of our childhood.

  12. Another thing you can do is read over their shoulder when they’re checking their email and just riff on it like an INSANE PERSON. Example: my husband got an email from newegg.com and that was my cue to be like “I GOT A NEW EGG LET’S SEE WHAT HATCHES OUT OF IT!”

  13. Why hello, adorable Scion ad! Thank you so much for making my day so much more precious with your incessant need to be up in my grill all the time!

  14. Annoyingcats and annoyingdogs? More like annoying bloody food chain if you ask me…

  15. The most adorable part of this video is Massive Attack playing in the background. Those are some pretty hip animals, you guys.

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