I’ve never had a kid, so I’m sure I just don’t understand, but what’s the deal with parents not stopping their kids from being jerks all the time? The other day I was on the train and two kids next to me were fighting. And they were kind of getting me involved in their fight, because I was sitting next to them and they were babies, so when one of them would grab the toy from the other one it would hit me. And their mom was watching them. And I’m like, hello? Mom? Make them stop!!!!

And another other day I was walking behind this dad with his two kids, and the little girl kid was dragging the boy kid by his hair and the boy was screaming and the dad didn’t even look back! “Should I be doing something?” is what I thought to myself. When you have kids I’m sure it’s an endless string of fights that you’re tired of breaking up, but maybe just still keep breaking them up, especially when they involve ME, because clearly I cannot handle it and will remember it forever. Anyway, let’s look at this video of babies fighting and wonder at what point they would have been stopped if the Internet didn’t exist:

Hahah, that is very cute, though. “I said no first!” “You’re not four, I’m four!” Squeaky voices. The first rule of baby fight club is never stop a baby fight if you think it is cute enough to be talked about on a blog or if you are just too tired. (Via VVV.)

Comments (35)
  1. “And I thought the gridlock in Washington was bad!” – Jay Leno

  2. I let my son beat up whoever he wants. It’s how he proves that he’s the dominant baby.

  3. It’s like they are tiny little people! AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!*

    *This comment brought to you by Thisismynightmare’s ovaries.

  4. If children are the future, it looks like we’re in for more of the same.

    • I can’t believe the Democrats are still filibustering the “I No four, You four” Act. It would add millions of jobs to the economy by forcing everyone under the age of four to get a damn job already.

  5. Maybe I’m just being paranoid, but something doesn’t seem to add up here.

  6. Wait, are you implying that adults don’t get to be jerks almost always? Someone better tell Bill O’Reilly.

  7. kids say the darndest emulating their parents fighting every night and they probably live in a broken home so this is more alarming than cute things

  8. I have a kid. She can be an asshole. I try to correct it is often as I can, but sometimes I just don’t have it in me to say “Please stop that” for the 1,000 time today. Or I’m too drunk.

  9. Where have I seen that little girl before??

    Oh yeah…

  10. 2 babies enter. 1 baby leaves (in a huff).

  11. I think you have to be childless to find this video cute. I got seveteen seconds in when I remembered I use the internet to escape from chipmunk screeching.

  12. For every horrible child on the subway there is an equally adorable one. The other day this kid and his dad got on the train and the kid was like “When we get home can we play Godzilla vs. Mecha Godzilla?” And the Dad said “Of course.” A seat opens up next to a young woman and the child sits down. He looks at her then looks at his dad and asks, “Can she play Godzilla vs. Mecha Godzilla with us?” He responds, “She probably doesn’t want to play Godzilla vs. Mecha Godzilla.” The child asks “Why not?” The Dad responds “Because some people have different interests.” The child pauses and then nods. “I understand,” he says. And with that, my heart melted.

    • Oh man, just *reading* that melted my heart a little bit! I love when kids nod knowingly So cute.

    • COUNTERPOINT: Kidz Bop

    • I think that kid’s the wing man!

    • I was at a water park the other day with my sister and her kids and went into the bathroom. A dad and his son were in there and, as per nothing, the kid turns on his father and says, “daddy, when are you going to die?” Adorable.

      • These are all things my daughter has said to me:
        “You have stretch marks”
        “Why are the veins on your hand so big?”
        “You look like Mrs. Gultch (the Wicked Witch, Kansas version)”
        “The skin under your eyes is so dark”
        and my personal favorite….
        “your lips smell like meat!”

        So, by my own experience kids are just jerky by nature.

  13. ummmm….bing? we need to talk…

  14. So this is the prequel to that Eminem video with Merry and Meghan Fox?

  15. God they’re so wasted..

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  17. lol!
    like that? check out this one
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FT5mU6w_KQg
    gets really good around the 3 minute mark. :)

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