I’m not sure if you’ve ever been to an In-N-Out, the very popular west coast fast food burger chain, but I would like to tell you something about it. In-N-Out is not that great. “Yes it is, it’s the best!” – You, everyone, everyone in the world ever. No it’s not! I’m sorry to have to blow the lid off of the whole In-N-Out situation, but guys — those are just normal burgers. They taste and look normal. Also the fries are normal, if not a little worse than normal. It’s (I guess) better than other fast food burger chains, but that’s not a very difficult thing to be and let’s not get crazy. I mean, certainly I’m happy for you if it makes you very happy, like this woman in the video. That’s great. I wish anything non-alcoholic that I could buy for fewer than $5 could make me that happy. She’s going to eat so many burgers now and she won’t even have to go very far to do it and I do hope she cries every time. But I can’t stand idly by. Those burgers are normal burgers. In fact, MOST burgers are normal burgers. They taste like meat + the thing you put on them. I rest my case. (Via Reddit.)

Comments (80)
  1. I was fooled into thinking that I HAD to try In-N-Out when I went to California this year and it was totally bland. I felt very betrayed.

    • I had the same thing happen! I broke from my vegetarianism to try one because of all the things I have heard about it, I was so excited. It was just a burger, it wasn’t bad, like Kelly said, it was just a burger.

  2. CULVER’S ALL DAY EVERY DAY CAN ANYONE FEEL ME ON THAT

    • I don’t like their burgers (I am not really on Team Burger though, so that doesn’t really reflect on Culver’s as much as it does on me) but oh em gee I could eat those cheese curds all day long until I died from them, which I most certainly would.

  3. Co-sign. Never have understood the thing with people going crazy for this place.

  4. “But Gabe, you don’t understand! Our regional fast food chains bind us together as a people!” – the saddest people

  5. As a person who moved to California from New Jersey and ate at Carl’s Jr., Jack in the Box and In-N-Out once I arrived, I can say that at the end of the day Kelly is 100% right. They are all just burgers, and the exclusivity/grass-rootiness of In-N-Out is really what people are fauning over, whether they’ll admit it or not.

  6. “Hey! Thin women can’t cry over their love for fast food. That is for us! Not for you! For US!” — Fat Guys

  7. I don’t know you guys. In-N-Out is so fucking good. Look at what I have to choose from for fast food burgers where I live: Burger King, McDonald’s, Sonic and Wendy’s. Not very good choices. Whenever I can have In-N-Out, it is like a miracle fast food burger. It has been almost three years since my last In-N-Out burger. I know this b/c it was when I went to Las Vegas on my honeymoon, and I will be married for 3 years this month. Whenever the next occasion is that an In-N-Out burger touches my lips, I may cry. JK!!!! I won’t, but I will be like THIS IS SO FUCKING GREAT!!!! ANOTHER ONE PLEASE!

  8. while we can agree the burgers are good but not cry-worthy, you have to admit, their religious messaging is second only to Chic-Fil-A (and maybe certain government officials.)

  9. 5 Guys Burgers N Fries is clearly the superior burger joint, even if I do enjoy an In-N-Out burger with animal fries on my West Coast trips.

    • Mmmmmm… Animal fries.

      I’ve lived in SoCal almost my whole life and JUST realized about a month ago that you do the fries animal-style. I was totally getting bored with In-N-Out until that delicious game-changer came my way.

    • My little city got in-n-outs about a year or two ago, and people went crazy. It was. . .okay. Then we got a 5 guys about six months ago. Those are some burgers! They are not any fancy, crying-on-the-news kind of burgers, but man are they delicious. Everything a burger should be.

      • 5 Guys is pretty awesome! I went there when it opened and was like “I can put WHAT* on my hot dog? This is great news!”

        *bacon, green peppers and A1 sauce. At a restaurant! Not just at home alone experimenting after too many bong hits!

  10. Are the burgers that good at In & Out? I mean every time I go there I only order the garden salaBWAAA HA HAHA HA HAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sorry, I couldn’t get through that one with a straight face.

  11. I like the fries.

  12. We might be seeing this clip again at the beginning of an Intervention episode. “You will see my everyday!”

  13. Geesh…”me” not “my.” I haven’t had my double double yet today, so I’m not on top of my game.

  14. As a Canadian monster i have no idea what “In-N-Out” is, apart from it sounding highly innapropriate. Like it just sounds like a silly gag description of eating and shitting.

  15. The “Women Laughing Alone With Salad” biopic is really stepping up, now that the “girl who enjoys burgers with dudes” antagonist is cast.

  16. the milkshakes are atrocious.

  17. I will tell you why I like In-N-Out. First of all, that sauce they put on the burgers, even if it is just some sort of amalgamation of Thousand Island, is great. The ingredients they use are all fresh from that day. Crispy onions and juicy tomatoes. The meat is also really tasty. At the end of the day a burger is just some meat, sauce, and veggies between two buns, but I appreciate that I can get a non-reheated burger for less than five bucks that tastes pretty decent.

  18. ANY burger is obviously the best burger

  19. Counterpoint: In-N-Out is really fucking good.

    Also, I assume this woman is a CA transplant living in Texas (Frisco, perhaps?) where they just opened a location or two. If I was forced to live in a hole like Frisco, Texas (or anywhere in Texas for that matter), the arrival of in In-N-Out location would possibly be the greatest day in my entire life. Better even than the day I got cable in my new apartment after living through an entire day without cable. Well, maybe almost as good.

  20. Now a debate needs to begin for Southerners about whether or not Raising Canes are the best chicken fingers or not…

  21. Actually, you are wrong. They really are NOT normal burgers. The bun is just the right amount of crispy around the edges, the sauce is original and amazing, CHEESE PAPER! No one else has a burger like that. But you are right about the fries. They are awful.

  22. That’s my hometown. Seriously, every single day for the past month or so, someone in my facebook feed posts about going to this place and how either good or bad it is and how long the line is. Is there seriously nothing better going on in Dallas right now?

  23. She’s very thin. If she eats there every day she will no longer be thin. Of course, maybe she’s very hungry and her hunger made her cry. Or she hates her life and misses California.

    True story: Today I was very hungry so I went to get a sandwich. Rye, veggies and hummus. The jackass put honey mustard on it and it was one of the worst things I’ve ever eaten — or the parts I tried to consume were. I am still hungry, 6 dollars poorer and wondering if I’m a jerk for contemplating going back to the store and asking for a refund. I don’t want another sandwich, at least not today… maybe not ever. I have tasted disappointment, my friends.

    That being said, if someone presented me with a stuffed spinach and tomato pizza from Chicago (not Chicago-style but something from Giordano’s or Edwardo’s… I might cry. But mostly because I’m *that* hungry.)

  24. chick-fil-a just opened in chicago. as a southern person, i was very happy, but i didn’t cry. because i’m a man.

    • Not to bespoil your waffle fries, PattyO – but you do know that Chik-fil-A is run by religious zealots who donate much monies to anti-gay-marriage groups like “focus on the family?” Also, they are closed on sundays to honor the birth of Zeus, or something like that.

  25. As a condescending big-city type, I can only imagine that the enthusiasm comes from having another fast food option in your crappy little town which is slightly better than Burger King, McDonalds, etc.? When you live in a place that actually cares about food tastes, In-n-Out just isn’t so exciting. For instance, I eat burgers made from the succulent meat of orphans, you small town hill-billies. Look upon my works and tremble. Yeah, that’s right. A BYSHE reference. And yes, that is also correct: I’m so elite, I only refer to Percy Byshe Shelley as BYSHE!

  26. I can’t really disagree with any of the points made, but I still HAVE to get an In-N-Out burger everytime I go to visit family in LA. Even if it’s not the best fast-food burger, it’s MY fast-food burger, damnit. I can’t really make any argument for its superiority, and I have to say that Shake Shack is definitely better (though that’s not really in the same category), and Five Guys is pretty damn good too.

    For me a double-double with animal style fries and a vanilla milk shake is still the standard of what a fast food meal should be. Ima go back to LA later this month and am pretty sure it will be the first or second meal after I land. MEMORIES!

  27. Fat Burger (with egg and cheese) thank you. And Umami.
    The long lines at In-N-Out are only slightly less baffling than the long lines at Pink’s.

  28. I feel this way about people who go crazy for hot dog places. The line between a terrible hot dog and an okay one and an amazing is the exact same line.

  29. I ate at the very In-N-Out she was crying at…her tears tasted better than the food. Ka-chow!

  30. http://www.benzlogo.com/

    I tide fashion Good-looking, not expensive Free transport

  31. I’m a California native now living in New York and I got to say: In-N-Out has nothing on Shake Shack.

    These guys agree:
    http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2011/05/in-n-out-vs-five-guys-vs-shake-shack-the-first-bi-coastal-side-by-side-taste-test.html

    Seriously, Shake Shack is the best fast food burger in the country, hands down. There is no argument. I win. In fact I think Ima gonna walk on over to my neighborhood Shake Shack right now and get me a shackburger. yum

  32. *munch munch*

    Well that was indeed awesome. Good plan, tizzdogg.

  33. I’m with the pro In n Out crowd. About the fries; you have to order them well done. Mmmm crispy. And it’s actually good quality meat. No low grade, half seaweed or kangaroo meat crap.

  34. Really? Not one person?

    You’re welcome, Videogum.

  35. You’ve clearly never tried your In-N-Out burger Animal Style.

  36. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

    • Nooooooooooooooooooooooolololol

    • “But after you move here (here being the land of Gods called California- not this expansion Texas bullshit) and eat it regularly, you will find the addiction taking over. Is it just a fast food burger? Yes. But is it so far superior to all other chain restaurants that even vegetarians still figure out a way to go? You bet your ass”

      So you’re fat.

    • now i know who downvoted my shake shack comment!

    • “WHO’S WITH ME?!!?!?”

      “Guys?”

    • Putting aside the unwarranted attack on Kelly and the misogyny (do I honestly even need to address how despicable this is?), you could not be more wrong about In-n-Out burgers. They are terrible. And very wet. Always dripping. Gross. The fries are great and the shakes are okay, but the burgers are just awful.

      If you want a good local fast-food burger joint, try Tommy’s. Or Fatburger. Or Umami Burger.

  37. Stuck up boring burgers. It sucks how you need a secret ordering technique to make their food any good. Ugh. Too complicated. And stupid hats.

  38. I refuse to put anything described as “animal style” in my mouth. Between that and double-double and the other terms I’ve heard I feel like this place’s menu was written by giggling 12 year old boys who are using sexual slang they’re not 100% sure of yet. That actually goes for naming the place “In-n-Out” too.

  39. “I wish anything non-alcoholic that I could buy for fewer than $5 could make me that happy.”

    I think that’s all anyone really wants out of life.

    Also, I would hate to see what happens when that girl gets mad.

  40. In-And-Out has a special place in my heart for making grilled cheese sandwiches (grilled bun, grilled onions, tomatoes, lettuce, mmmm). When you get out of a major city for roadtrips and fast food is all ya got, it’s tough out there for a vegetarian.

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