Guys, Woody Allen is old. NO DUH! We know that. Which is also the subhead of ever issue of Duh Aficionado Magazine. “Duh Aficionado Magazine: We Know That.” (You know who isn’t very old? THAT DAUGHTER OF HIS THAT HE MARRIED LOLOLOL.) Anyway, right, he’s old. No duh. But this recent interview on the Midnight in Paris junket really reminds us in case somehow we forgot. From MSNBC (via FilmDrunk):

Reuters: You still write your scripts on a typewriter?

Woody Allen: I don’t own a word processor; I am not a gadget person.

Reuters: So how do you adapt to the world of iPods and iPads?

Woody Allen: I have a telephone, a cell phone, but all I can do on it is call out and receive calls. I don’t have any other use, I have no, what do you call it, text number?

Hahaha. Somebody send him a telegraph explaining that a word processor is not a gadget. Or a raven. Send a raven. Certainly don’t text him with this information because, you know, NO TEXT NUMBER. I would like to point out that I find this thoroughly charming and cute and I cannot wait until I am like this. “Maybe I’m falling behind with these kinds of things, but I never send holograms to my moon children. If they want to talk to me, it’s brainchip downloads only. No iButs!”

Comments (25)
  1. Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner are unimpressed.

  2. This sounds like my mom. She doesn’t know how to do anything on her cell besides call people. If someone sends her a text, she asks me to open them for her when I go to her house.

  3. How is a word processor like a raven?

  4. i’m actually jealous of him. i really wish i could afford to be that out of touch. it seems nice. it really does.

  5. This is my father’s iPad.

  6. I can’t believe the inventor of the Orgasmatron doesn’t know how to text.

  7. Not really much I can say about this. Annie Hall was very good.

  8. I just hire Billy Zane to paint my stepdaughter in the nude, none of this fancy sexting

  9. Although he will never know the joys of a 2-second video of a dancing husky, he will also never know the sorrow of a Windows Azure pop-up ad.

  10. Doesn’t he have a much younger daughter that can teach him how to text and use an iPod and then they can get married?

    (Sorry.)

  11. Even ignoring his really mediocre (if altogether irrelevant) late work, the whole unwavering support of Roman Po-rape-ski thing is enough for me to dismiss Woody Allen. Who apparently dismisses sexual assault. And Microsoft Word.

  12. It turns out bragging about how behind the times you are is so much more endearing than bragging about how ahead of the times you are.

    Take note, Black Eyed Peas.

  13. I guess they are keyword-generated, but the You Might Also Like post titles (Enema Man And Snoopy Snoopy Poop Dog et al.) got as many laughs from me as this article.

    I like the earlier, funnier posts.

  14. The only thing I need my phone for is calls, texts, and an alarm clock. It’s nice to have a camera phone and a poker game as well.

    I am on the internet all the time at work, at home. I have very little interest in checking my email or updating my facebook status while I am away from the computer.

  15. All I can say about this is it made me realize Scarlett Johansson is into old dudes. Woody Allen, Sean Penn. Who is next? Ugggh.

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