As most of you know, one of the most controversial hot button issues these days is circumcision. Wait, what? Russell Crowe took a break from his busy schedule of making terrible movies, band practice with Thirty Odd Foot Of Grunts, and throwing telephones at other human beings to take a public stand against circumcision! On TWITTER! From JustJared:

“Circumcision is barbaric and stupid. Who are you to correct nature? Is it real that GOD requires a donation of foreskin? Babies are perfect,” the 47-year-old actor wrote on Twitter on Thursday (June 9).

“I will always stand for the perfection of babies, i will always believe in God, not man’s interpretation of what God requires,” Russell continued.

“Last of it, if [you] feel it is [your] right 2 cut things off [your] babies please unfollow and f— off,I’ll take attentive parenting over barbarism,” he concluded.

Unfortunately, Russell Crowe has since deleted the posts, which is too bad, because I would like to FAVORITE all of them. Is it just me, or is the real problem here the way he talks about babies? Like, everyone is entitled to their opinion about circumcision, I could literally not care less, but Russell Crowe talking about his powerful belief in the PERFECTION OF BABIES is one of the creepiest things ever. Haha. Yuck. I am entertained! I am entertained!

Comments (69)
  1. Yeah but what about all the things he chopped in Gladiator? You’d think he would be pro-chop.

  2. This is all a misunderstanding. He heard every one was getting all riled up over “topless Weiner” pics this week and he was just trying to capture the zeitgeist.

  3. Russell hasn’t seen his own cock since about 3:10 To Yuma.

  4. Master & Commander: The Far Side of the Baby Geniuses

  5. Turtlenecks: Good enough for Carl Sagan, good enough for my wang (Lil’ Martha).


  6. Someone is being a bit stiff on this issue.

  7. To follow up his points, Mr. Crowe then tweeted a link to “Vagina Ain’t Handicapped” thinking it strengthened his argument.

  8. I don’t know. I dislike Crowe as much as the next guy, but having read the conversation between he and Eli Roth, it seemed pretty clear that they were messing around with each other. Even TMZ thinks it’s bogus.

  9. By that I mean TMZ is not Just that they of all places would probably be excited to jump on this sort of thing, right?

  10. you’d think a guy with 30-odd feet of gunt would be for it….

  11. My boyfriend currently works, and I use to work, at a hospital. As a hospital, it if FILLED TO THE RAFTERS with old people. Like, oooooooold people, the decrepit, frail, generally non-mobile kind. Due to this lack of mobility and general upkeep, they are super susceptible to various infections and maladies, and some of the worst come from old dudes with uncircumcised penises. So, sure there’s an argument for keeping the foreskin because it’s natural and “God’s intent,” but when having to clean an old dude’s foreskin (or cleaning the result of NOT cleaning an old dude’s foreskin), it kind of turns you off from the idea of keeping it… *shudder*

    • DirtySpaceNews,
      Nope. If people who have to clean elderly peni have a problem with smegma, they should go work somewhere else. Chopping off parts of baby peni is never the answer! Anyway, they’re already changing adult diapers so what is the big deal.

      • canadiantuxedo,
        While you’re entitled to your opinion, I respectfully disagree (no downvote-o). While I don’t know if it’s actually a causal relationship between sick elderly people contracting infectious diseases in the hospital and uncircumcised penises, I think that DSN was giving us his opinion based on his experience. Just because he finds it disgusting that he has to clean the disgusting crap that comes with aging doesn’t mean that he shouldn’t be involved in that line of work. I don’t know any healthcare professional who would ever admit to looking into a nasty human orifice and think, “Yippee!”

      • One, our jobs weren’t exclusively old dude penis related. So yeah, it’s still gross as hell. Two, PUS PENIS. Three (do I need a three?), my point was that it may seem a bit barbaric in the short term, but later in life it can make things easier. People get along just as well without it, so I pose your question to you: what’s the big deal?

        • I don’t think that “Maybe several decades in the future when he’s old, my baby’s penis is going to get infected” is really a good enough reason to perform an irreversible (I know there are men who try to stretch out the tiny sliver of foreskin left after a circumcision, but 1) Yikes 2) It doesn’t look the same, I recall one such man comparing his stretched foreskin to a sock with the elastic worn out, as compared to an uncircumcised penis’s foreskin as being like a sock with new elastic. I know that sounds gross, but it’s a pretty descriptive way to explain the difference between a natural foreskin and what happens when someone tries to get one back) 3) The man has already been without a foreskin too long for it to have the effect of more sensitivity in the head of the penis that being uncircumcised arguably has) operation on my baby before he’s old and conscious enough to consent.

          If a baby is uncircumcised there’s nothing to stop him from getting circumcised when he’s older and decides for himself. To me, circumcising my child to prevent an infection he may never develop would be the equivalent of getting my daughter a mastectomy because if she keeps her breasts she may someday develop breast cancer.

          cakeordeath, I don’t think anyone is asking or expecting hospital workers to be *happy* to clean old penes, but the point (IMO) is that it’s something that can be expected in that line of work, as lots of disgusting things are. I agree with canadiantuxedo that if it’s that much a problem to clean an old man’s smegma (or an old anybody’s poop, or phlegm from a trach or any of the other number of very gross things people in the medical field deal with on a daily basis) they should perhaps not seek out a job where it is necessary and should be expected.

          • Antisocialite, you said it way better than I did. Thanks!

          • Who on Earth would decide when they get older to get circumcised? Yikes!

          • I will say that this is one of those arguments where I should just recuse myself because I can’t be unbiased about it. I’m circumcised and always have been. I can’t speak to how it feel and how to live with an uncircumcised penis. Also, I simply don’t know the list of pros and cons of circumcision are; maybe there’s options later in life that can clear everything up that I’m not familiar with. So, perhaps entering into this argument was faulty, BUT my opinion still stands.

            It’s not an everyday occurrence we saw a pus penis, but it happened enough for me to actively note in my head that that is something I never want to happen to me or my hypothetical son. I wasn’t saying that I was ever unwilling to day any number of unsavory tasks that hospital presented to me, I was just merely noting how ohmygod unpleasant they were. You’ll find that anywhere in medicine. I imagine no surgical procedure is ever met with a “Man, I just love the part when I cut the guy open and …”. I guess, to make a broader point, the human body is super gross, but I can get over it.

            I also echo zach’s comment. Guess what? Circumcision HURTS. Especially when you’re cognizant enough to register the pain. No one WANTS to get circumcised. A point I was trying to make in my first post was that when your penis does get all fugly with infection et al., it’s not just “clear away the gunk, brush off hands, we’re done.” No. If it gets bad enough, surgery is involved, and you could lose part of your penis. And when you get old enough, you want to be under the knife as LITTLE as possible, especially for something as minor as your penis.

            So yeah, perhaps I’m over analyzing things a bit. And maybe I’ve been won over by the circumcision lobby. But I’ve got my reasons.

          • DirtySpaceNews, you say “I echo zach’s comment. Guess what? Circumcision HURTS. Especially when you’re cognizant enough to register the pain. No one WANTS to get circumcised.”

            Um, that is pretty much exactly why I am against doing it to babies who have no say in the matter.

            Fun (actually, no, not fun at all) Fact: some men do choose to get circumcised when they’re older. I don’t know why they do it, but it’s their choice to make so I support them in that.

            I have heard a few uncut guys say that they have at least looked into circumcision in their teens because people made fun of them in the locker room and high school gfs said they looked gross. That pisses me off, because they have the default penis, but circumcision has for some reason become so popular that it’s looked at as the norm. I get annoyed enough at people who say I look sick because I’m naturally pale and don’t tan, I can’t even imagine how much worse it is to be mocked for your natural default appearance when it’s something that can only be righted with surgery. I mean, I used some Jergens Natural Glow for a little while just to shut people up & now that I’m older I’m like “No, fuck that., I’m pale because I’m supposed to be” and it’s not like a guy can get a Mystic Circumcision one summer to fit in then still be his natural self when he’s older and has gained the confidence.

        • DSN, performing unnecssary cosmetic surgery on a baby IS a very big deal, especially when that surgery is NOT reccomended by the American Academy of Pediatrics. As a parent who has had to make this decision for my own kid, I would never put anyone or anything above my own child’s safety.

        • My two cents: Put his ol’ head (not of the Richard-kind) in a jar. It makes for very efficient palliative care.

  12. I have a friend whose fantasy is to be with an uncircumcised guy just once. I guess locating one these days is like finding a unicorn?

  13. Honestly, the question of whether circumcision is something one should do to a child does bother me a bit, cos I know my main argument for is that I don’t want my kid to have something that looks different than mine and whose upkeep is a mystery to me (there’s upkeep to an uncircumcised penis, right?).

    • I love when people say they don’t want their kid to look differnt. Do dads and sons compare their junk? Is that a thing? Because me and my mom never compared our junk. Yes, there is upkeep, but you have to clean your ears too and I don’t see people cutting those off! Also, there are thousands of nerve endings in the foreskin, so think about what you’re saying. Maybe there are guys out there who would rather have to spend less time in the shower in exchange for less pleausre, but that is kind of lazy and sad.

    • The upkeep is showering. Only a problem in group showers because I am ashamed to go into them because my penis looks different from everyone else’s.


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  14. REAL PENIS TALK, GUYS. I can’t tell you how glad I am that my parents had me circumsised when I was too young to remember it a half hour later. The anti-circumsision folks all say that men can choose to have it done when they’re adults and I’m like WHAAAAT?! I really like my circumsised penis. It’s hygienic and it looks nice. If I was presented with a choice to remove my foreskin at age 18, I can tell you that I would not. So I guess what I’m trying to say is THANKS MOM AND DAD FOR BARBARICALLY MUTILATING MY GENITALS AND MAKING ME A CRIME AGAINST NATURE.

    • “It’s hygienic and it looks nice.” — That One’s tombstone


      I strongly disagree with everything you just said! Accusing my dick of being unhygenic and not looking nice is kind of mean! Furthermore, you have less sexual sensitivity (which is kind of a mixed bag for stamina purposes, but whatever).

      Props on being slightly less likely to get the bug if you have unprotected sex with someone with HIV. That’s clearly a +1 for barbaric.

      • I’m really sorry! I didn’t mean to say you’re unhygienic. I heard that keeping your area clean when you’re intact requires extra attention, and that would be so annoying to me. I feel like a dick right now. But really, I go back and forth on the issue. I’m personally glad I’m cut but if I grew up and didn’t like it, I would be really upset. I guess we should just both be thankful that we’re happy with our respective situations.

        btw, I didn’t know about the sexual sensitivity thing! I thought it would be the other way around since the glans is so sensitive.

        • I apologize for being a 12-year old boy about this, but COME ON!!!

          “I feel like a dick right now… I go back and forth…”


          Keep the comedy coming, That One.

      • Funny thing about guys talking about their junk and how it looks and hygiene and sensitivity: Except for the vanishingly small percentage of adult circumcisions, neither cut nor uncut guys have ANY idea what it’s like to be uncut or cut, respectively.

        So despite all us dudes’ being real invested in our own junk being RIGHT*, personal experience should be taken with a grain of salt, if at all.

        *Anyway mine is totes the rightest junk of them all, so stop your jibber-jabber.

        • And NO THANKS FACEBOOK I actually DON’T WANT TO PUBLISH my junk-braggery to my family. I have a sock-puppet account for that, duh.

          • Yeah, the sensitivity thing is the constant exposure of the glans deadens it. Mine is sheathed and only is out for special occasions so it is, according to doctor types, more sensitive.

            James is right though. We have no idea. But with no idea, I err on not slicing.

        • YES, THIS. This should have sprang to my mind sooner.

      • That One is allowed to have his preference of which dicks he finds more aesthetically pleasing, don’t let anyone take that away from you! Unfortunately for women, they don’t really have a choice if they’ve already willingly gone that far with a guy, it’s too late.

  15. Thanks for the tip.

  16. Ok, I’m…actually kind of weird about this (BUT ONLY THIS ONE THING). I wish I had my foreskin! And maybe I wish I had yours too, if you know what I mean.

    But whatever, man. It will almost certainly not be the greatest harm most people do to their kids.

  17. Where is H.O.O.P. and Lindsay Bluth Fünke when we need her?!?!

  18. Just let them snip it! You don’t want a Matt McNamara situation on your hands, parents! (Where my Nip/Tuck peeps at?)

  19. Oh god, I just realized that as a mom one day I’m going to have to make this decision if I have a son. So me and my lesbian partner will have to decide what to do to our son’s penis! THERE IS NO WINNING HERE.

  20. I’m biased because I would probably have lost the skin on my elbow if it weren’t for the foreskin donation project in this state. But really no one should take any sort of stand until they are in the situation where they need foreskin.
    You never know until you’re there. Like the death penalty and shit like that. People make stuff more complicated than necessary, but, I guess that’s life teehee.

  21. reading those tweets and hearing them in my head in his Gladiator voice made this all worthwhile.

  22. Away from the prying eyes of the paparazzi, unbeknown to the adoring public, mild-mannered Russell Crowe dons the pink hood of righteousness and fights for God’s requirement as…”The Foreskin Avenger!”

  23. Circumcision. Well, who the fuck cares? A new mantle, a new axe to grind. I don’t think that people should get worked up over this. Really.

  24. come on – the guy has a right to his opinion.

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