Ooooh, I’m too young for this. From The New York Times.
Following in her mother’s footsteps, Bristol Palin is going to star in her own reality television show.
The untitled show has been ordered by the small cable channel BIO, formerly The Biography Channel. The channel says it will follow Ms. Palin, the eldest daughter of the former Alaska governor and TLC reality show star Sarah Palin, as she moves with her 2-year-old son to Los Angeles from Wasilla, Alaska, and works at a charity.
“Untitled?” UNTITLED?! Look, I know that names for reality television shows about the inexplicably famous offspring of an inexplicably popular politician who is for some reason taken seriously in this country don’t exactly grow on trees. But if you have time to sign a contract, you have time to think of a name. And if the LAMESTREAM media can’t do it, we’ll just have to stand in that gap. It can’t be that hard. We just need a few more details to make sure we get that name juuuuuuuust right. For example, will, say, any of her fellow contestants on Dancing with the Stars be on the show with her? Let’s find out!
The show will also feature two of her friends, Kyle and Christopher Massey. Ms. Palin was a contestant on “Dancing With the Stars” with Kyle Massey, an actor, last year, and since then the three have become “best friends,” according to the channel, so much so that she will live with them in L.A.
Perfect. “…‘best friends,’ according to the channel.” I wish I could have been there for that scoop. “Now, Ms. Palin, I know you became friends with Kyle Massey. But would you say you became best friends? I’m just not comfortable having you move to Los Angeles with someone who isn’t absolutely your very best friend.” Also, this.
In a news release Bio describes Ms. Palin, 20, as “the most famous single mother in America.”
Good grief. There’s a quote for the tombstone. You know, I used to have sort of a soft spot for Bristol Palin. For all I knew, she was as embarrassed by her mother’s nonsensical ramblings as anyone. Even the Dancing With the Stars gig might have been excusable because, whatever, we all have to put shells in the shotgun. But once you start cashing in on your single parenthood and your child and your “best friend” by milking all of them to breathe some half-life into the feeblest of celebrity statuses and maybe keep those Palin 2012 hopes (nightmares?) alive, well, that soft spot turns to COLDEST ICE. Whoof. Yuck, yuck, yuckers.
But that’s all outside of our control. We can’t do much, so we should stick to what we can do. And what we can do is NAME BRISTOL PALIN’S REALITY TELEVISION SHOW. What will it be, guys?