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It’s getting harder and harder for kids these days to dance to Beyonce’s “Get Me Bodied” in a gym or cafeteria without Beyonce herself showing up. Whoops, sorry. The way that’s written, it kind of sounds like I’m talking about a problem. No. NOT A PROBLEM. The best!
Oh, Beyonce. You are going to give all these obese kids a heart attack and then who will teach them to eat/dance healthy?! (Via Vulture.)
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McGruff the Crime Dog visited my elementary school.
Lucky! We just got a cop wearing a McGruff T-shirt.
Officer Fox with the D.A.R.E. program came to mine every week. That reminds me, where did I put my bong???
Some BMX bikers sponspored by Airwalks (AIRWALKS!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA) came to my school. I don’t remember their names though, because it’s not like they were Beyonce or something!
Slim Goodbody came to our school in 6th grade. All of us learned a little more about our bodies and unitard art that day.
Oh man, I love you for this reference. I quite possibly would have gone through the rest of my life without remembering Slim Goodbody and his creepy unitard had you not reminded me. Thanks a million.
Slim Goodbody! I actually looked for one of those unitards for a Halloween costume (because it would have been the BEST Halloween costume), but came up zilch. I even checked Yahoo Answers, and this is what they had to say:
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20060727164356AAHH3mO
whoa… I was just remembering Slim Goodbody today for the first time in YEARS! Weird coincidence… nobody under 25 in my office seemed to remember him.
very jealous he came to your school.
One of our classmates got to sing some Weird Al songs for us!
But then in 3rd/4th grade my school set a national record for United Way donations so we had this pep rally. I think I gave a quarter or two? #humblebrag
We got the Jesse White Tumblers at my school once. Chicago monsters should get this reference.
Unfortunately Beyonce did not get the memo about the proper dress code for this school dance and no one let her sit at their table
that poor girl and the khaki pants too… there’s always one
The most amazing thing about this is that she does that dance in those heels. Good Lord.
RIGHT? The fact that her knees haven’t given out by now after 10+ years of dancing in heels confirms my suspicions that she is, in fact, a robot. A sexy, sexy, sexy robot.
My thoughts exactly! And they are like spike heels too!
It’s like they say: Beyonce does everything Jay-z does, but backwards and in spike heels.
Oh, women…
meanwhile, I think I have the dance moves down now
ME TOO. Every time I see her dance, I worry about her feet and her knees and hope she has a good orthopedic surgeon. Also, how does she not just fall over in those things?
It makes sense she’d show up there. Two former members of Destiny’s Child were substituting that day.
Pop Quiz: name the other five members
Kelly, duh. Family got a free ride.
Michelle, the one no one cares about. (also, the other Michelle Williams)
LaToya, who had a minor career of her own a few years ago
LaTavia?
the other one…. that joined with Michelle and then disappeared? help?
Don’t forget Tito!
lisa left eye lopez
Activia!
True story:
Everytime I pass a wachovia bank I hum the activia theme song because I got them confused.
I give it three weeks before Gwyneth Paltrow starts showing up at children’s line dancing sessions to a smattering of applause followed by an awkward silence.
Who wants macrobiotic granola snacks? Anyone? Really? No One? I made all this food, and by I mean I made I mean my chef made of course
“After you’re finished dancing, I suggest you enjoy a shot of this amazing juice made out of wheat grass, beets, gold leaf, and camel urine. I swear, it changed my life.” — Gwyneth Paltrow, probably
you kids need any Georgian style bathtubs?
“That was really fun kids, but I’m going to have to confiscate everyone’s cellphones and cameras now.” -Ms. Beyoncé Knowles
Meanwhile, Jay-Z is also crusading against childhood obesity with his new song, “I Got 99 Problems but a Sandwich Ain’t 1.”
Slim Pimpin’
Jog This Town
Perspire State of Mind
Size 3 Bonnie & Clyde
(Arm) Curls, Curls, Curls
H to the Izzealth
My 1st Sit-Up
There will come a day in America’s future where the only educators left in the country are James Franco and Ms Beyonce Knowles.
And no one will ever get any work done because let’s face it if you don’t have a crush on Beyonce and/or James Franco then you don’t have a crush on anybody
On a serious note, is it just me, or is the world being sort of awesome lately? I’m worried about us you guys.
we haven’t even had any awful tea party news. The worst is what, Donald Trump is a grumpy old man? I can live with that.
Nah, the worst is those guys claiming that we have torture to thank for the takedown of OBL. Which we obviously do not, I mean hello logic. (To wit: If torture gave us this valuable intel, we might have capitalized on it, oh, I don’t know, some time remotely closer to when we were torturing people?) So anyway, don’t worry, the world still sucks. You’re welcome.
I know I used this yesterday, but it fits so well here.
It’s the calm before the 2012 storm.
Videogum was hacked last night. That was pretty much the worst thing that could ever happen.
Why did I upload my credit cards to Sony’s PlayStation Network AND Videogum!?
Haha, how does VG get “hacked”? Will there be some rogue pro-Gwyneth posts? Hahaha.
There’s a lot at stake here, guys…
I know it’s all VideogumUSA around here most of the time, but Canada just had a super cruddy election where a crazy asshole got re-elected.
I hope that makes you feel better!!
BUTBUTBUT the NDP got the most seats ever, and are about the best opposition you can hope to have against a Conservative majority (the Libs have moved waaaaaaay right in the last couple of years, thanks in part to the minority government).
We worked crazy hard in my riding, and got our NDP MLA re-elected by more than 6,000 vote more than in ’08. And Harper poured tons of resources into this riding.
SO! It’s not all terrible!!!
/Canadagum
#canadagum4ever
Let’s her get that reaction on a New York subway ride.
It cut away right before the janitor threw her an alley-oop and she dunked on like six fat kids.
“NO STREET SHOES ON THE GYM FLOOR!” – what my old gym teacher would have screamed at Beyonce, probably
But seriously, this is mega awesome. Life needs more choreographed dance numbers with lots of participants and special guest stars.
I do hope that Shane MacGowan hops on the trend.
BUT WHERE ARE THEIR AMERICAN FLAGS????
I tagged the video “traitors” in iTunes.
yeah! Michelle Obama brought flags for the kids she danced with today!
Did you guys see Michelle Obama doing the Dougie? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Pw8kKSqVIg
When will Kathie Lee Gifford’s dance be incorporated into school exercise programs? Whenever it is, can someone let me know so I can homeschool my kids during that time?
This kind of stuff used to happen all the time in my high school. Of course, back in my day, it was Aretha Franklin instead of Beyonce, and instead of dancing and clapping, she’d just cut in line in the cafeteria and eat all the mashed potatoes.
For the record, kind of a dick move to give all these gals image problems by calling them all obese. I mean, they are 14, they don’t look that terrible but definitely not obese.