Is it in reality “star” contracts that they MUST record a horrible song? Is it like a legal requirement thing? Because WHAT is UP? Oh well, sorry, guys, SPRING’S RUINED.
I can’t wait for his next single “I am not here to make friends”
“I have been thrown under the bus”
“Karma is a bitch (So am I)”
“You are the next American Idol”
He totally didn’t obey RuPaul when she told him, “Don’t fuck it up.”
Now all we need is one of those overly-plastic-surgeried women to record “I’m Fake” and we won’t need any more music, ever.
Heidi Montag had a promotional single called “No More.” I think that about sums it up.
Gabe, I think you are giving him too much credit by changing to title from “I Am Real” to “I’m Real.”
Gabe is a secret J-Lo fan
Or Ja Rule fan
Original Title: I Am Real (Bad at Singing and Also Apparently at Grammar As Well)
Whatever. He’s totally riding on the coattails of “Tardy to the Party.”
Ninth summer jam? Ninth circle of hell? Let’s ask Wikipedia!
Inferno (Dante): The ninth circle is ringed by classical and Biblical giants, who perhaps symbolize the pride and other spiritual flaws lying behind acts of treachery.
Ding dong! Winner. Ninth circle of hell confirmed.
But how does that apply to the ninth SPRING jam?
The 9th circle of hell actually has a springtime theme, similar to the CGI fields of flowers of What Dreams May Come. 
“I Am Real”
- Heavily Processed Vocals
“I Am Real”
- Red Vinyl Pants
Well, there is literally no other way to communicate that you don’t care what people think of you, and this is a message that people need to hear, dammit.
I’m just excited to hear this recreated by the Emmy Orchestra when Simon Van Kempens is accepting all of the Emmys.
True Story Time
MsQuinn and I were eating in a restaurant on Smith St. in Brooklyn one night when this dude and his nightmare wife came in with their kids. They were totally one of those couples that let their kid run riot all over the restaurant while ignoring the whole thing.
End Story Time
“Swagger” is the new “bling bling”.
“I bought those groceries with such swagger.” – Your Mom
RIP Swagger: 2010 – 2011
THAT’S A BINGO!!!
It’s over…. ugh.
Did anyone else try to write a comment while that song was playing? That song is so annoying I almost sprained my brain doing it.
Dunnkno wut u meen, artoodeeeeeetoo? IM lissenin 2 sogn an i kin ttype jus fayyyyyyyyn.
I alzo nose 1 sogn F U wud liek meeee 2 sign sogn 4 U?
This is my second favorite delivery of “I’m Real.” My first favorite belongs to Kurt Russell.
I give up on pictures.
Tagging this “music related content” is the perfect description. Succinct and doesn’t give anything away.
Calling it “the twitter”. Classic unhip person mistake.
who is this guy? actual question.
He’s looking a little like the post-swim version of the white old spice guy, but that can’t be right.
Well, in the song he talks about being a celebrity and one of the tags says “Real Housewives of New York”, so I’m guessing he’s someone I don’t give blue-fisted fuck about.
“don’t give blue-fisted fuck about” for the win, big guy. slow clap and everything.
From the waist up he looks like he should be hosting a juicer infomercial; from the waist down he is totally besties with Dave Navarro.
From the waist down it looks like he stole Buffy’s Red Leather Pants of Righteousness.
Money can’t buy you class, indeed.
Where’s Mr. Slave when you need something shoved up an ass?
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