Is it in reality “star” contracts that they MUST record a horrible song? Is it like a legal requirement thing? Because WHAT is UP? Oh well, sorry, guys, SPRING’S RUINED.

Comments (38)
  1. I can’t wait for his next single “I am not here to make friends”

  2. Now all we need is one of those overly-plastic-surgeried women to record “I’m Fake” and we won’t need any more music, ever.

  3. Gabe, I think you are giving him too much credit by changing to title from “I Am Real” to “I’m Real.”

  4. Original Title: I Am Real (Bad at Singing and Also Apparently at Grammar As Well)

  5. Whatever. He’s totally riding on the coattails of “Tardy to the Party.”

  6. Ninth summer jam? Ninth circle of hell? Let’s ask Wikipedia!

    Inferno (Dante): The ninth circle is ringed by classical and Biblical giants, who perhaps symbolize the pride and other spiritual flaws lying behind acts of treachery.

    Ding dong! Winner. Ninth circle of hell confirmed.

  7. “I Am Real”
    - Heavily Processed Vocals

  8. Well, there is literally no other way to communicate that you don’t care what people think of you, and this is a message that people need to hear, dammit.

  9. I’m just excited to hear this recreated by the Emmy Orchestra when Simon Van Kempens is accepting all of the Emmys.

  10. True Story Time

    MsQuinn and I were eating in a restaurant on Smith St. in Brooklyn one night when this dude and his nightmare wife came in with their kids. They were totally one of those couples that let their kid run riot all over the restaurant while ignoring the whole thing.

    End Story Time

  11. “Swagger” is the new “bling bling”.

    “I bought those groceries with such swagger.” – Your Mom

    RIP Swagger: 2010 – 2011

  12. Did anyone else try to write a comment while that song was playing? That song is so annoying I almost sprained my brain doing it.

    • Dunnkno wut u meen, artoodeeeeeetoo? IM lissenin 2 sogn an i kin ttype jus fayyyyyyyyn.

      I alzo nose 1 sogn F U wud liek meeee 2 sign sogn 4 U?

      DAAAAAAIIIIIIIYYYYYYSSSSSSSYYYYYYY.

  13. This is my second favorite delivery of “I’m Real.” My first favorite belongs to Kurt Russell.

    t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRxV3yE7dh4Zv0yZwo_IMIDl1TJzHF3Hvz6qaE_5u2V8GD-nYNm

  14. Tagging this “music related content” is the perfect description. Succinct and doesn’t give anything away.

  15. Calling it “the twitter”. Classic unhip person mistake.

  16. who is this guy? actual question.

    He’s looking a little like the post-swim version of the white old spice guy, but that can’t be right.

  17. From the waist up he looks like he should be hosting a juicer infomercial; from the waist down he is totally besties with Dave Navarro.

  18. Money can’t buy you class, indeed.

  19. Where’s Mr. Slave when you need something shoved up an ass?

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.