Photos
Kim Zolciak, the only white housewife in Altanta, who is also not a wife, is a fucking liar. Look, giving people on reality TV a hard time for contradicting themselves or for engaging in self-serving, sub-respectable behavior is like shooting the most obnoxious fish in the saddest barrel. BUT SOMETIMES FISH NEED SHOOTING. After last week’s episode in which Kim threw an extraordinarily lavish and over-indulgent birthday party for her daughter (who was turning ELEVEN!), I was totally ready to give it a rest with the Kim bashing this week. And lord knows (by lord I mean “anyone else who watches this show”) that all of the housewives deserve plenty of criticism and mockery, if not for the way in which they are living their lives (we all have to get through the day), then at least for the way in which they have decided to present the way in which they are living their lives to the rest of us. But this Kim. OMGod. She needs to be stopped, because liars are the worst, and all the liars should go to jail.
After the jump, Kim Zolciak, CAUGHT IN A MESH TEDDY OF LIES.
Here is Kim at a photo shoot, which supposedly has something to do with her aspirations to be a country singer, because as you know, the first step towards a music career is photos. Later she will take voice lessons, but first it’s photos duh.
She just hates cleavage you guys. She wants to be respected for her talent. She’s not just another blonde with big boobs. If she had it her way, she wouldn’t even have boobs probably. Did you know that in high school she was voted Least Likely To Show Her Cleavage At All Times?
You’d think with all that money she has that she could find a repairman to fix all her broken shirts. FUCKING LIAR. Those are just screencaps from last night’s episode, which doesn’t even take into account the “slutty school girl dress” from two weeks ago. Oh, also this:
Go to jail, Kim Zolciak.
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I thought for sure you would also call her out for claiming she is 29. Gabe, I am also 29, and she looks old enough to be my mom.
There is some debate on this point, and I am giving Kim Zolciak the benefit of the doubt on that one. I think what she was saying is that she looks great in pictures from when she was 28 or 29 (because she said both ages, didn’t she?) and that she would like to have some pictures of herself looking great now for in the next 20 years. I really don’t think she was claiming to be 29, because she’s ridiculous but she’s not that ridiculous.
Careful with the fancy editing, Bravo.
“She’s real kinda quiet.” Is that English or…?
Why is nobody mentioning her hair?! It looks like the worst kind of Halloween wig and I can’t pay attention to her cleavage (even when it has bright circles around it) BECAUSE HER HAIR IS FUCKING CRAZY. She is like a year-round Jessica Simpson Halloween costume.
I am so glad u said that shit! That tupw is not a good look, that was the only thing that i didnt like about her but every since last week episode I think she is as dumb as a spongcake! She is so easy she dont even recognize when she being played by lil popa and sherake (that my name 4 sheree bcuz she looks like she been hit in the face w/ a rake LOL ) Anyway I love NeeNee that my girl she the only real one on the show. Lisa is a 2faced busy bitch! And Deshawn needs to stop tryin to be superwoman w? that fake ass charity event instead hring somebosy to take care of her kids and husband. she should hired an event coordinator! Holla
Real talk guys- I love[d] Reality TV and still celebrate the guilty pleasure nature of it, but why is ALL new Reality TV morphing into the biggest rubberband ball of delusion and shame? If it’s not that, then it’s “Which Leukemia Patient wins a Handshake from Howie Mandel?” I don’t have answers, I just come with my hands outstretched in criticism.
I feel so strongly about my above comment that I scored up myself. My credibility is shot, the terrorist have won. Next season on FOX “Fat People in Biker Shorts!” On tonights episode the bikini models from Hawaiin Tropic throw triple cheeseburgers at caged fatties to make them realize their external flaws.
I never have and probably never will watch this show, but I appreciate you taking one for the team and watching it for me (for all of us).
i wish there was a test you had to fill out to be a mom.
well, fish never need shooting.
but for the rest of the post, okay.
also, has anyone found Lisa yet? Lisa Wu?
Gabe’s jail is so overcrowded.
Gabe,
I agree with you without the foul language. She is an opportunitist who is a Hot or Not drop out. Big papa is just Mr money bags who funds her ambitions with most likely some bennefits. Past history sadly leaves some questions in regrds to her real motives one of which I doubt is really to become a country singer. Just a spoof! The past catches up with you eventually and her’s is not the best. There is a police dept with a black eye in CT that will confirm that.
I agree with the comment about the past catching up with you. I use to go to school with Kim here in CT. I remember how she was and I do hope she has changed for the sake of her children. Wish good things happen to good people instead of people who don’t deserve it…
Lori,
I have lived in CT my whole life. Who is this Kim and where did she grow up? I heard she met Big Papa (Lee) while working as a high priced dancer at the famous Cheetah club in Atlanta. Something not right about her…..
Where did Kim grow up in Connecticut? Does anyone know? I live in Connecticut and have never heard of her
I am so glad somebody said something about that shit on her head! They r not real friends cuz somebody should have told that doughnut. Also Sheree need some serius child rearing classes and invest in some serious braces 4 her son, instead of buyin all of those bueatiful gorgeous wonderful shoes did u see them (the burberry, the burberrry!) i had a shoegasm when I saw the polks dots! and as far Deshawn goes bless her she needs everyones help right now help her jesus! NOW LETS talk about that litle two faced troll bitch from hell LISA the reason why she never nsleeps is bcuz evil dont sleep She told sheree about the song bcuz she knew kim and her had started kickin it and she was going to tell her.
These women are wannnabes. NeNe is the only real one on that show. As for Kim, she’s an overpriced hooker. She’s probably never even had a real job, please she claims to have a nursing degree and can’t spell “cat.” I also believe her “boyfriend” is a married man. I thought the NYC wives were self important but these ladies take the cake. At least the OC wives spent time w/ their families and knew their children, these ladies just buy their children’s affection and pay someone to get them out of their hair b/c they are so “busy.”
I think that Nene, and Deshawn are the real women of that show. I think that Kim is not good enough for Nene.
Also talk about a low budget Bitch maybe she should look in her own back yard and take care of herself and not live off of others.
She needs more than a vocal coach, she needs some one to take her to rehab.
Sheree had to wiggle close to Kim to ensure she would get so tv time. To me they are both a waste! A wig anda pig. Neither have any class, talent or reason to waste my tv time. Since they are their own biggest fan clubs maybe they will be lesbians next season and give us something real to watch them for. I love NENE, Lisa and Deshawn. Let’s add 2 new wives and throw out the trash.
Who cares?
They’re all fucking stupid.
I know her Ct. History.There was a police Sargent who she willing had an affair with ,who helped pay her bills.She lived in low income housing.She knows exactly what she was doing with no regard to any ones feelings but to get her sick needs met.That is a sociopath.Next there was Daniel Dominic Toce my soon to be ex husband,I’ll get to that next.He was married to a beautiful ,smart,women they had two kids.At the time the youngest was 5months old.Her brother brought Danny to help Kim with a flat tire ha ha .He got totally wasted ,her brother left Danny said she came out of the room ,naked with only a tong .She sat down next to him and did what she is known for,guess ?I’m going down.He said when they went to bed she took off her hair he said it looked like a dead animal,then her blue eyes came off,pretty ahead of the times.She called him constantly ,and finally his wife over heard a conversation and through him out.You go girl.He said when he showed up at Kims she said what do you want?She took him in .He wanted to go back home so badly but his ex had class,and divorced him.So now with no where to go he went with him to Georgia because her dads job sent him there.They used his joint credit cards for her boobs and her.The oldest daughter is not his .He also doesn’t think the other one is either.He went away that weekend golfing in Fl.with people from work one was his mistress who was pregnant the same time as Kim funny how karma works.That really is his daughter,He lost parental rights to all of his kids except Kims.He only married her because she was afraid of what her dad had to say.She worked at hooters in Ct. Her picture is there.In Atlanta she waitress at some places .But she landed a gold mine when she got her stripper job at The Cheetah spelled wrong strip club ,she stripped naked in private rooms .She made bank and one married or more paid her to be there mistress.I’ll write the rest later.