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CORRECTION: bibs ARE just for babies. (And caricatures of Italian-Americans.) But sure. Yes. I mean, let’s be real: this world is full o’ slobs. If the planet is 80% water, then the human population is 90% slobs. (Isn’t that right, CHILD SOLDIERS OF DARFUR? Stupid old child soldier slobs.) And quite frankly, I would rather see someone hosing off their slobstopper in the parking lot than have to sit across from them at the meeting and they’re all covered in gravy. “Has THIS ever happened to you?” Yes. No more gravy shirts! Buy your slobstopper today, you slobs. It’s time to get real about your body and the way you present your body to other people, particularly at meetings.
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But is the slobstopper everlasting?
My boyfriend thinks the same with me. He is 12 years older than me, lol. We met online at A’geM’ing’le. com The premiere online community for older women seek younger men or older men seek younger women to meet and share your interests. Ever feel that you would best enjoy someone who is not in your age group? Leave behind the other general dating sites out there and try us.
Also perfect for people with adult baby fetishes
Because of your avatar, I heard you say that in Kristen Schaal’s voice and it seemed like a perfectly normal thing to say.
Something something something blow job…
“Did you hear about this one? The Slobstopper? It’s a bib for adults. It’s perfect for when you can’t be bothered to drop off your blue Gap dress at the dry cleaner!” — Jay Leno’s monologue, any time between 1998 and the present
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. That’s great, man.
“Ugh, that guy just accidentally spilled coffee all over himself in a totally normal way. I’ll not give him a second look.
Oh, that guy just put a bib on, and THEN, spilled coffee all over himself. Planning is hot. I will make babies with him for sure.” — The director’s daughter who was that girl in that video.
“Saying something we wanted to, in a way we never could.”
Frank Lloyd Wrong
2011-Forever
They just need a good celebrity endorsement.
“Do I, as an adult man, need to use items that were initially designed for babies? Depends.”
-Hugh Jackman
I think this is an awesome adult diaper/hugh jackman joke that I couldn’t have come up with, but was pondering. HUZZAH facetaco!
“Depends.” I see what you did there.
Tired of your stupid children? Then put on a bib and pour a cauldron of oil all over yourself!
Oh, my busy lifestyle! Just chillin’ in the parking lot, drinking my latte, watching ladies for a half hour before I go to work.
Who are the ad wizards who came up with this one?
No, seriously. They spent 30 seconds in this commercial trying to sell me a bib, and they only example they could think of where I might need it is when I spill coffee on myself while ogling women from a parked car.
Last time I saw a Bib that useless, he was letting Luke Skywalker use a Jedi mind trick to gain an audience with Jabba the Hutt.*
*I’m actually kind of proud about the nerd level of this comment.
I feel so Fortuna to be able to appreciate it.
Can I hug you? Is that appropriate?
While that guy was ogling women with a SALACIOUS eye, he could at least B sure he wasn’t getting CRUMBs on himself.
Lay off him, he’s just trying to MAXimize his chances of catching this girl on the REBOund. Band.
I don’t appreciate your jokes at all. They stir great RANCOR in me.
#amidoinitrite?
This needs a visual aid. (also, how freakin’ cool is this little guy?)
“Oh, he’s wearing an adult bib and saved his clothes from a mess! CHECK PLEASE. One way ticket to my parent’s house! To meet my parents. Where he will ask my father’s permission for my hand in marriage. SPOILER ALERT: We live happily ever after.”
Do you think they make formal Slobstoppers? You know, for the wedding reception?
I think you have a winning proposal for Slobstoppers, Inc.!
Just ordered three. Can’t wait to put it on while wearing my Pajama Jeans, Snuggie and TV Hat.
PARTY AT THAT ONE’S, BITCHES!!!
My escaped dental patient costume is now finished.
Theoretical: This is a video of a real guy. Shouldn’t he be way more concerned with the fact that he just dumped hot hot hot coffee all over his chest rather than that he messed up his shirt? This man is far too invested in his appearance, and not enough in his personal safety from hot things.
perfect! no more living in fear of embarrassing gravy robbing incidents.
I’m worried about Daniel Plainview, you guys.
There’s a whole ocean of gravy on our bibs! No one can get at it except for me!
You have to admire Daniel Day Lewis’ ability to throw himself into a role.
Gifsoup will not let me make a gif of that soccer mom’s eyeroll even though that needs to be a gif, I’m worried about that soccer mom guys
I’m genuinely confused as to why she put it on. Her kids are messy? But I mean, those kids are like 14. Can they not handle themselves with food or drink? Why doesn’t she give them the bib?
Nothing in this commercial makes sense. Like when the voiceover is like, “Don’t you hate when this happens to you?” and all it is is a girl walking down the street, then like 10 seconds later a guy ogles her and drops coffee on himself. They need to go to ad school.
Maybe we’re to assume that she’s going to devour her young and didn’t want to get viscera on her top. After the way the first guy spilled his coffee this whole video required suspension of disbelief.
+20 points for use of viscera.
For you, Ian:
“ugh, great. this kid is so gross, *I* need a bib, just to be safe.”
But how will I keep my Slobstopper clean?
With a Slopstopperstopper? No, of course not.
The correct answer is a plastic tarp. (Patent pending, the Gallagher Group, LLC)
Probably one of the best logos I’ve seen in a while.
Then you haven’t seen the beauty of Mitt Romney’s new logo…
That gradient on the top right corner wins it all.
it makes me feel like I’m in danger of spilling my cell phone. A very real fear for slobs like me.
I feel like that guy should tackle the issue of not knowing how to drink from a cup before giving up and just putting on a bib for the rest of his adult life. Maybe try a cup without anything in it for a while, and then we can gradually move up to hot liquids?
I’m kind of concerned about his casual resignation that this is just something that happens frequently enough that he can justify wearing a bib every time he drinks, for forever. Don’t give up, guy! It gets better! You think you deserve this pain, but you don’t.
I like your optimism, but this guy is beyond hope. The first time he spills the drink, he looks down to watch it keep cascading out of the cup (because he didn’t even stop pouring as it pulled it away from his mouth), and KEEPS HIS MOUTH OPEN and the drink spills out of his open mouth.
Lost cause. He doesn’t need a bib, he needs to be institutionalized.
Maybe he should learn to drink his coffee through a straw like a normal person?
I love the little nod Mr Spills does after he dribbles hot liquid down his adult bib and into his crotch.
“That’s right girls, I’m ballin’ ” – This guy
So some friends invited me out for dinner at the lobster pound, and I was all “Well, it’s pouring rain and I don’t wanna go out, but I should totally bust out my new Slobstopper(TM) for this.” But when I did they all laughed at me, and that drew the attention of the manager, and she was all “That is a non-themed bib, sir, and I’m afraid if you won’t wear one featuring this delightful line drawing of the USS Chowder Pot IV, then you’ll have to leave”–like I had brought my own candy into the movie theater!–and so I said “You’ve got some nerve,” and then her brothers tossed me in a giant puddle in the parking lot, like John Larroquette in Blind Date or something, but the joke was totally on them because I still had my Slobstopper(TM) on and my Le Tigre shirt didn’t get the least bit dirty. The End.
Hell Yeah!
These will go GREAT with my D-Pants!
Anyone remember the Boopsie?
“Don’t make an Oopsie without a Boopsie!”
it had a pretty design on it so you could wear your bib in style.
“finally! i can vomit completely publicly and with virtually no shame, as i’ll be wearing a giant bib!”