“I’m definitely a feminist, but if I had to describe my personal philosophy it has less to do with, like, gender inequality or counter-acting socially constructed normative roles, and a lot more to do with giving everyone the freedom to live their lives as they see fit. I’m one of those women who believes that there’s nothing anti-feminist with cooking for “your man” or taking charge of creating a home, if that’s what you want to do. I mean, isn’t the whole point equality in everything, including equality to CHOOSE? I totally respect and appreciate the struggles of women who came before me to defy the patriarchy’s status quo and open up the world to the rest of us, but we can’t simply replace one set of expectations with another. If anything, it is anti-feminist to demand that women fulfill any role other than the role they choose for themselves, right? I mean, that’s how I see it. Of course, I do have certain demands for any man that I’m going to date. He has to understand and respect where I’m coming from. It also doesn’t hurt if he is a total creep and won’t shut up about apologizing to Gaia or whatever, as if he and his turtleneck were personally responsible for the institutionalization of sexism and misogyny. I just want a man who is constantly looking into my eyes, flattening out his pervert mustache, and whispering “I’m sorry, for everything.” It’s hot!”
Good GOD! I’m all for, like, women or whatever, but WHO ARE THESE DUDES AND WHAT ARE THEY DOING? Oh well, now we may never know, as I’m sure they’re all in the morgue, having died from suffocation after being up to their necks in pussy.