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Say what you will about child actors–that they are unhuman replicants, that their massive armies of well-equipped tweens will destroy us all, that they are the stuff of nightmares–they were literally born to perform. That doesn’t mean they’re very good at it, but they’re definitely comfortable doing it. If anything, they’re TOO comfortable. This week’s Saturday Night Live host, Miley Cyrus, was far too quick to just burst into song during her opening monologue. It’s like, wait, WHO ARE YOU EVEN? But for the most part, she did a relatively serviceable job considering her age (11) and her amount of innate talent (middling). There were a couple of real duds this week, but it was never for a lack of EFFORT. You could practically see the Vaseline on Miley’s teeth! Much like you could practically see the drugs coursing through The Strokes’s veins. We can make all the fun we want about Justin Bieber’s “swagger coach” and yet no one says a word about the fact that The Strokes have clearly employed a “drug addict coach” to give them that just-so look. It’s working! Those dudes look terrible!
The cold open was about Charlie Sheen, naturally, which is kind of the problem with OLD MEDIA. Like, Bill Hader’s impersonation was really great, and there were even lots of good jokes, but by the time this aired, those of us who had been following the story on-line, which was most of us, were already overcome with Charlie Sheen fatigue. Sorry, SI NEWHOUSE. That being said, Bill Hader is the best, so let’s act like it.
The show included another fake talk show (actually, there were THREE fake talk shows in the first 45 minutes, which is A LOT of fake talk shows!) with the recurring sketch: The Miley Cyrus Show. Get it? Now, to her credit, Miley did a decent Justin Bieber impression. And I guess the whole thing was supposed to show us what a good sport she is (as if a normal person wouldn’t just be insanely flattered that there was a completely benign and toothless recurring Saturday Night Live sketch about them?) but I think Saturday Night Live misjudged the excitement of this moment. It’s one thing when a cast member impersonates Robert DeNiro or Sarah Palin and then the actual Robert DeNiro or Sarah Palin comes out and confronts them. For one: those dudes are kind of scary. For two: it’s the real person confronting the impersonation, rather than the impersonation being confronted by ANOTHER impersonation. Also Miley Cyrus is 11. She’s got no juice! Anyway, it happened.
The writers’ sketch at the end of the night was just OK, but it is notable (to me) because Miley does sing my song in it.
The Digital Short-style parody of the movie trailer for Beastly was the first time I have ever wondered “how many people have seen the movie trailer for Beastly and is it enough people to sustain a comedy sketch?” I think the answer is probably “no,” but also: VERY GOOD RANGO JOKE. Worth it. Seriously.
But the best sketch of the night hands down no duh was the Disney Acting School sketch. (The best joke of the night goes to Seth Meyers’s delivery of the Hugh Hefner Playboy Mansion diseases joke.) The Disney Acting School sketch is just really great. Strictly 4 tha pogz.
And, of course, The Strokes. It’s nice to see that they have stuck not only to their original sound, but to their original being so gross to look at. MORE LIKE The Yucks!
Next week: Zach Galifianakis! So I guess that’s pretty cool. (Get it? You get it.)
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Julian Casablancas will be popping zits at 80.
Seriously. They are the grodiest.
“The Strokes are so gnarly. And by gnarly I mean it looks like they have been gnarled.” – Charlie Sheen (never forget)
Seriously. Julian Casablancas is kind of cute. (ugh, sorry)
Not you again!
FYI this comment was meant for a Spammer whose comment Gabe has since deleted.
Farting?
Ray Ramano looks rough.
The Replacements sketch was not very funny.
All the upvotes, Nate. All the upvotes.
Rhymes with winning?
ORANGE ELPHABA
They should have done a sketch where The Strokes wash their faces over and over.
the strokes being gross is my totem.
everything (the world) is awful right now, but at least the strokes haven’t grown up or changed in ten years.
Reality check for me: Miley was like ten when the first Strokes record came out.
Eight. She was EIGHT. (so was i, but whatevs)
Say what you want about Julian, but i’m about 93% sure he was wearing a calculator watch, and that’s OK in my book.
Remember kids; if it isn’t technically illegal yet, it is both cool and respectable.
-Miley Cyrus
Paid for by Salvia Divinorum
Winning!
How do they still look like teenagers 10 years after their first album? Not good teenagers like new 90210, Bad teenagers like old 90210.
I’d be one of the goddesses if it was Bill Hader’s mansion full of cocaine and unsupervised babies, even despite my functional upbringing and relative mental stability. There, I said it. I would stone cold hang out at Bill Hader’s house all the time doing whatever.
I too would also be happy be a professional goddess to Bill Hader. I’d drink the Hader-ade and join his cult.
dibs on Sudeikis
I will fight you for JSuds.
When Bill Hader does his Alan Alda impression, my brain needs a good week to recover.
Gabe has a fair point about the Miley Cyrus recuring sketch being benign and toothless, but I thought she was a really good sport about the whole show.* A lot of the sketches pointed out that pretty much everything she’s accomplished** up to this point is kind of garbage, and she seems to be cool with acknowledging that and moving on. For that, she gets a very situationally-specific thumbs up from this droid.
*the whole show=the first 40 minutes, because I fell asleep (very old/verycool)
**I couldn’t think of a more neutral word, so I went with “accomplished”
pretty much everything she’s accomplished** up to this point is kind of garbage
Rebuttal!
This is an oddly good look for Miley.
I know a monster that looks like this. She is cute.
Justin Bieber’s new hairstyle is freaking me out.
I loved every bit of the Disney kid acting sketch. I have two little sisters that used to watch that crap while they were tweening. I also worked down on Main Street USA at Disney World for a semester and wanted to attack Raven Symone with sledge hammer when she paraded down the street with her awful lip synching. But then I realized it was all my fault because I thought it would be cool to work at Disney world for a semester.
Just think, we will probably get two weeks of “That’s So Raven!” jokes since ZG is hosting the next SNL.
Kenan had the two best jokes this week. Both provided in these gifs.
The funeral’s on MONDAY
Apple.d.app is another way to say Abplolsdislee
Thanks, concert_addict!
“and I look like a Japanese ghost” = lolz
“Nice to meet you, me llamo Taboo. I have my own line of jackets called ‘A Thousand Pockets.’ Also, despite the rumors. I am not a Japanese ghost.”
thank you very much for that. I think I confused the “I come from the Matrix” and “not a Japanese ghost” lines.
This sketch kills me. The dancing. Oh, the dancing.
Ohmygod BEST. SKIT. OF. THE. NIGHT.
Because it’s so true.
“You know how will.i.am is way of saying William? Well apl.de.apl is a way of saying Apldeapl.”
THE PIE.
Amazing. So amazing.
Broker, please invest 100 shares of “Vaguely Asian Magazine” into my LOL(k) portfolio immediately!
All I could think during Miley’s opening song as she belted out her case was “GIVE IT TIME, MILEY. GIVE IT TIME.”
You’re not the only one. I have a very hard time believing she will continue her career completely sober. Frankly, I don’t understand how she was sober during Hannah Montana. That show is god awful.
the strokes most definitely have fingers smelling of shrimp (and heroin).
When are we going to get to the Celebrity Apprentice post? (Only half joking…Gary Busey is cramazing)
This episodes too much singing was to the Russel Brand episode of too many lorries. I still enjoyed it though.
what was this one? Hulu skipped it?1!!?
This was the same sketch they did with Emma Stone at the beginning of the season: dancing Parisian kids.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H_4Ggev2ymo
the gif is better.
so was the one with Emma Stone.
I thought that was the best sketch of the night IMHO.
I don’t know why, but I find this sketch hilarious.
I thought so too. Although I think anything with silly dancing is funny. Like, even though Gilly was a terrible nightmare, I thought the opening song was hilarious because of her dance.
This sketch was so fucking weird. I couldn’t decide if it was so stupid it was great or if it was just stupid.
I’m glad somebody finally had the balls to blow the whistle on Big Fake-Talk-Show. This is the laziest and most maddening thing about the SNL of the last 50 years.. (Get it?) If they can’t write a decent sketch (read: most of the time) they just take a relevant celebrity or invent another crappy catch-phrase dropping character and give them a talk show. Over it… Except for Deep House Dish… That always made me LOL.
does celebrity jeopardy count as a talk show? cause that was the best.
No. Because it was definitely the best.
Once upon a time, I eagerly awaited every Disney Channel Original Movie(‘Thirteenth Year’, ‘Luck of the Irish’, ‘BRINK’) and enjoyed myself some ‘Even Stevens’. The Disney Channel is the only thing my nieces watch now. It *is* TV to them. They are also some of the sassiest jerks that I have ever loved.
‘Hannah Montana’ makes my brain fall out of my head when I have to watch it BUT this episode did make me respect Miley Cyrus a little bit more.
I felt like the audience could have been a LITTLE bit more generous with their laughter but it was an audience of Strokes fans.
Miley Cyrus trying to be funny was more enjoyable than watching The Strokes trying to be that cool.
My 15 year old cousin (seriously, why are these kids STILL watching Disney?!) is probably going to try and reject Miley Cyrus after watching this SNL, but I so want to tie her to a chair and yell “No you don’t! You helped create this creature, now you’re stuck with it!” Not sure why the chair is needed, I think I’ve just been looking for an excuse to tie her to anything because she is a shitty kid.
And while I am a diehard strokes fan, I will say that their insistance to look and sound off in public (TV performances) is pretty unnecessary at this point. You’ve made it this far without being played out on the radio, The Strokes, I think it’s safe to say you can relax now. Also, I’ll see you in Vegas this weekend: don’t screw it up, Julian!
Miley Cyrus makes me want to HAVE a stroke, amiright?
Did anyone catch the Videogum jokes in the cold open? “Platoon 2: Electric Platoonaloo” and the email from Gary Busey? Also, the fact that they’re not using Obama or some other politician in the cold open (which I remember reading about in the comments recently)?
WE are writing SNL, is what I’m saying, Monsters.
My girlfriend said the same thing. Are you my girlfriend? Could you pick up some chocolate milk on your way home from work because we’re almost out.
Has anyone else noticed the Disney Channel’s hilarious and off-putting propensity to dress its child stars in unreasonable amounts of layers?
EXHIBIT A:
EXHIBIT B:
EXHIBIT C:
WHAT CLIMATE ARE THESE PEOPLE SUPPOSED TO LIVE IN, DISNEY?
The kind of climate where it snows piles of money from Corporate Clothing Sponsor Heaven?
I feel I should note that she is 23 years old. And having to wear this.
Somehow that reply ended up down here, but should be below pink vinyl gal that was also in the Social Network.
You don’t get to a billion friends without wearing a few layers.
How do you recommend they hide all the wiring and circuit boards?
Whatever happened to Lalaine, Dinsey?
INQUIRING MINDS KIND OF CARE!
She got arrested for meth and then she was in The Easy A for three seconds.
That is so beautiful I’m going to cry.
To be fair, ‘Lalaine is also involved in many charity events, such as the AIDS benefit concert and *NSYNC’s challenge for the children.’ -WikiLalaine
Toy story was ok
Expected to see more enthusiasm here – to me it was maybe the funniest episode so far this season – hopefully eclipsed by Zack next week.