Videogum reader Yael sent in a Craigslist ad posted by TLC looking to cast people on the second season of its nightmare show, My Strange Addiction. If you haven’t watched it, My Strange Addiction is a show about people who COMPULSIVELY EAT TOILET PAPER, for example. Although, the one time I actually DVR’ed the show was because the episode description promised to depict the sordid story of a woman who was ADDICTED TO VENTRILOQUISM, which I guess it did, but I found the whole thing to be kind of boring. Admittedly, she was spending thousands of dollars that she did not have every month on DOLL CLOTHING, but still. There weren’t any fireworks! And you cannot overdose on puppets so there wasn’t even a chance of seeing a live, televised death. Snore. Hey, here’s a fun fact: the letters TLC used to stand for “The Learning Channel.” Neat!

Anyway, their latest Craigslist casting call is looking for people to be on the show who suffer from being a “never nude.” Uh, wait a second. Wait. You mean, like, the thing that David Cross’s character Tobias Funke was on Arrested Development (2003-2006)? Because, uh, THAT IS NOT A THING. Full casting call for “never nudes” posted after the jump:

I mean, I am sure that there are people who refuse to get naked in public. Obviously. There are people who COMPULSIVELY EAT TOILET PAPER. We come in all shapes and sizes and some of those shapes and sizes are tucked snugly into a pair of denim shorts at all times. But you can’t just throw the term “never nude,” a recurring joke from a short-lived and relatively “fringe” sitcom, around like you just got back from an edit session on the new edition of the DSMIV. This is a craigslist casting call for a garbage reality show! Take it seriously!

Comments (68)
  1. Videogum Everywhere opportunity. Inquire within.

  2. Yeah like the guy in the $4000 suit is going to go on a TLC Reality Show, oh come on

  3. Meanwhile, as part of their “The Sea Strikes Back” series, Animal Planet is sending out a casting call for people who’ve had their hands bitten off by a loose seal.

  4. I would say I probably wear clothes 23.5 hours a day/7 days a week. Is that close enough to count?

  5. FINALLY! I have an outlet to expose my problems to the world. I have been wearing a sock on the little toe of my left foot since I was 8. When it wears out, I change it with my eyes closed. I haven’t seen that toe in 18 years.

  6. Meanwhile, nowhere to sign up for this gentleman who is addicted to running banana stands…

  7. …I’ll never understand? That you can never be nude?

  8. Wait, was the ventriloquist episode about Gob and Franklin?

  9. What about “always nudes”? When do we get a show? And when will they stop putting me in jail?? It’s a condition!

  10. A casting pool of literally dozens.

  11. Also, if you’re one of those, you know, “alpecas,” or whatever, the Hair Club for Men would like to speak to you about a lucrative endorsement deal.

  12. I mean, you gotta poop sometime. AMIRITE?!

  13. TLC misses Arrested Development too. I don’t blame them.

  14. I’m looking forward to seeing TLC cover other fictional maladies, like “High Midichlorian Count” or “Addiction to the Spice Melange”

  15. It affects dozens of people. DOZENS!!!!

  16. I hope we get one of the members from German parliament.

  17. The Learning Channel? News to me…I thought it was all about Tender Loving Care on TLC.

  18. I should only hope that the theme song for this particular episode would be J.O.R.T.S.

  19. For consideration, please fill a bag with some glitter, your photo resume, some candy, and a note.

  20. Never nude isn’t as bad as the rare “der immer nackter Menschen” (always nudes). I wish my grandma would where some cutoff jorts. Ugh.

  21. I hope TLC has a certified analrapist on hand to help these people deal with their strange addictions.

  22. Man, I really blue my chance at getting on TLC. I’ve made a huge mistake…

  23. Could I BE wearing anymore clothes? – Joey Tribbiani

  24. I’m looking forward to their medical series about TBA

  25. In a related story, Bravo is looking for America’s Next Mr. Banana Grabber

  26. Dear TLC,

    I am huge fan of you and I just have to ask, where do you get your ideas?

    Sincerely,
    Nikker.

  27. Why don’t they just go to the convention?

  28. I once dated a girl who ate mud/dirt, but she was hot, so it was cool because I felt like I could save her from her mental problems.

  29. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  30. At what point does TLC (The LEARNING Channel) have to change its !$@*!#% name due to the “This Is The Opposite Of Learning” shows it runs???? Say yes to the dress, What not to wear, Jon & Kate plus 8, 19 Kids and counting, I didn’t know I was pregnant, Babies behind bars, Hoarding shows, Outrageous kid parties

  31. So they’re just 3 random letters now, it doesn’t stand for anything anymore?
    (In best Emily Litella voice:) “Oh, that’s very different… Never mind”

  32. Eeeeh! Videogum referenced the DSM-IV! *swoon*

  33. Has no one seen this TLC promo before?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_8jeuYMHX9Y

    Their line-up is very educational. Better than 10 school classes put together at once.

  34. I don’t understand the Craigslist posting, and I won’t respond to it.

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