If anything, this dance probably made you TOO comfortable. BOOM! YOU’RE SEDUCED! (Thanks for the tip, Nora.)
I don’t know what was more offensive: his dance or his mullet.
Trick question: It was his tan lines.
That’s the Most Illegal Thing I’ve Seen in the History of…. Sunbathing!
I’m pretty sure the most offensive part is the title- “The Moist Maker”. Even just typing that made me barf in my mouth a little.
I like the “Afternoon Dancing Video” theme, Gabe. Keep it up!
“Your Seduced!” Ha!
That’s your seduced.
Ah he fixed it. You are welcome, Gabe.
. . . and THIS is why you don’t do drugs.
…because of the 80′s?
Yes. Because of the 80′s. I got nothing.
It’s a pretty solid argument, actually.
I thought it was because the drugs will wear your little brother’s skin like pajamas?
I have the weirdest boner right now
just right now or mostly?
I’m as moist as a snack cake down there
I don’t wanna sound easy, but Community references always get my upvote.
The good news is that it’s 2011 and that guy still does not regret getting that arm tattoo. When reached for comment he shot-gunned a beer and screamed “I’M FUCKING AWESOME”.
from the source circa 1985
“Listen, Bro, chicks dig these guns I’m packing. Catch my drift, Chief?”
The dancing was okay, but the camerawork was AMAZING.
The blue screen is to seamlessly transport them to your wildest fantasy location.
Moist maker on the moon? you got it!
Moist maker in a dairy farm? you got it!
Moist maker in Mordor? you got it!
Moist maker on a yacht in Lake Havasu? YOU BETCHA!
I’ve been made successfully moist.
One does not simply moist-make into Mordor!
This guy knows what you’re talking about.
NOOOO!!!!!!!!! This guy:
(cue Charlie Brown shaming music)
and 22 years and 9 months later… here I am!
Wait, its not my birthday…
How could you, dad?!?!
“YOUR” SEDUCED?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!!?! GABE IT IS “YOU’RE” GET IT RIGHT YOU ARE TRYING TO RUN A RESPECTABLE BLOG.
Did Steve Winwood change his name?
I hereby call the Bad Decisions Club to order.
If loving you is Frank Lloyd Wrong, I don’t wanna be right.
the timeless art of SEDUCTION!
The sexiest of the them all:
HEY! PLAGIARIST COMMENT! Hmm, whatever. Two dancing Chris Farleys are twice as nice (and sexy)
Ack!!!! I am so sorry! Please accept this gif as my apology:
I will accept. For my love of cute, puffy puppies knows no bounds
I see your cute puppy and raise you a dancing Keepon.
Hot Cops do The Moist-Maker:
I see you’ve kick up the 4d3d3d3… But where’s the hat wobble? Where’s the flargunstow? I mean, c’mon.
Is there anyway I can see a nude Tayne?
And my work here is done.
Lots of Loves.
This is your Bounty commercial
Unfortunately, Bounty’s tagline of the “quicker picker upper,” just doesn’t work in this situation.
Sorry, dude, I think this guy has you beat for the”The Moist-Maker” of 1980s:
She’s So Moist because she’s wearing leg warmers
Then they all went to Alfred Molina’s house to buy coke while “Sister Christian” blasted on the hi-fi.
Dammit Gary, it’s tank top off first THEN you shimmy out of your short shorts! And where the hell is your banana hammock?!?! At this rate, you’ll never get your solo dance at Chippendales!
Look at that fucking hipster.
This comment deserves far more than one upvote.
i know you might not want to watch the entire video, but you should. because right at the end he alllllmost starts playing air guitar but then only half does, over and over again. “air guitar is cool right? i should play air guitar when we are actually doing it.”
Wow. I have obviously been doing it wrong. Time to go racing-stripe shorts shopping.
Guys, Gabe forgot the link to my Kickstarter project for ocular Purell.
I love how the only thing that isn’t stiff about him is his dingle.
IT WON’T STOP JIGGLING AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Videogum is the best source for kitschy dance moves. The missus will love it when i whip this one out. It’s so funky!
Can we all just agree that the word “moist” is the worst word in the English language? Followed closely by “panties.” Let’s just stop saying those words.
i’d like to add “horny” to that list
“supple” is definitely in the running
So is “turd.” Sorry, it’s just awful.
I think knickers is gross ESPECIALLY when you add moist to it. Moist Knickers……ewwwwwww!
Top three moments:
3. Tan lines
2. Ball jiggle
1. Obvious basement
It’s difficult to understand why more women aren’t into porn.
next time i invite anyone to my marital bed, i will use this dance to seal the deal. thanks, videogum!
Damn, I want in on THAT marriage!
Do most strippers wear underpants under their underpants?
And couldn’t he have gone tanning in the underpants instead?
On second thought, that might have been beneath his dignity.
There are two people and no kitchen appliances in this video. I don’t get it.
I bet he fixes the cable after he finishes dancing.
maybe he gives them a pizza
This was not the kind of moist-maker I was expecting…
“Strip sequence?” Cool words, bro. You’re doing it sexy and right.
I think he lied about his career, which leads me to wonder what job is so embarrassing that he pretends to be a stripper?
This guy ripped off his dance moves and style from about 60% of Aussie men.
Or more specifically Warwick Capper (for the 3 people that might know who that is)
A low grade porno was made immediately after this was over.
Since this IS from an ’80′s porn flick…
1: A low grade porno was made immediately after this was over
2: She WAS seduced by the dance.
3: It WAS a moist maker.
Everyone’s a winner.
Now, it’s time to go practice my new moves for the weekend.
Look out ladies. (because I suck at dancing and will most likely step on your toes)
Is this gay porn?
Gay porn would be wayyyyy hotter than this
Wait, was anyone else as disappointed as I was that he didn’t take his underwear off? And that as soon as he started touching the chick’s boobs, the cameraman cut to her leg warmers and high heeled shoes? I mean, come on! What kind of porno is this supposed to be?!?
I was wondering about that cutaway too! As if that is the most uncomfortable thing going on in this video.
Now I know where Cory Monteith got his dance moves.
You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.