Last weekend, both Bill Maher’s Religulous and David Zucker’s An American Carol opened in theaters across America. Yikes. I know we live in a particularly partisan time that the pundits like to refer to as a “culture war,” but I’m pretty sure we can all put down our Roe v. Wade guns long enough to agree that Bill Maher and David Zucker should be forced to fight at the edge of a cliff to determine who is the worst, and at the end we blow up the cliff.

Anyway, Religulous apparently took in three times as much money at the box office despite being on one third as many screens. That’s industry talk for “ha ha, aw.” OK, Bill Maher, you are slightly less the worst than David Zucker, I guess? I don’t know how that works. We’ll let the cliff fight sort it out.

But apparently the An American Carol team believes that they didn’t just lose the hearts and minds of the American movie-going public due to the fact that their movie looked like one of the worst things ever, and maybe someone should have told them that Leslie Nielsen and Kelsey Grammar aen’t the box office draws they once (read: never) were. NO. The reason An American Carol did so poorly was because of TICKET FRAUD.

Now, the following message from the makers of American Carol (via Wonkette via FilmDrunk) has been removed from the movie’s homepage, but it hasn’t been removed from the part of my brain that keeps me laughing all day:

We have had heard from numerous people across the country that there has been some ticket fraud when buying a ticket for An American Carol this past weekend.

Please check your ticket. If you were in fact one of those people that were “mistakenly” sold a ticket for another movie please fill out the form below. Hold on to your ticket so we can have proof.

If you have noticed other irregularities with the theatres in your area please let us know in the comment section below. For instance, Rated R film rating (when in fact we are rated PG-13), posters not being up, not being listed on the marquee, image or focus problems, sound issues, etc.

Please email us a picture of your ticket stub to fraud@americancarol.com

CRAMAZING. Ticket fraud! It would be just like those minimum wage employees at our nation’s cineplexes to take it upon themselves to incite a cultural revolution via surreptitious mechanical failure. Would you like extra LIBERATION on your popcorn?

Seriously, this is the best story I’ve ever heard. Ever. Ticket fraud. I’ve created a map representing where most of the ticket fraud may have taken place.

Did I say where the ticket fraud may have taken place? No, sorry, I meant ridicule. I meant where most of the ridicule may have taken place. Ticket fraud does not exist.

Comments (10)
  1. I’m suprised they didn’t blame the whole thing on Michael Moore and liberals…oh and the Devil.

  2. Chadams  |   Posted on Oct 8th, 2008 0

    This is so worse that time when those two states had those problems with those things that you use to vote for the terrorist-loving heathens. Thank God for old people and magnifying glasses! (And ambulance chasers, a.k.a. the “real heroes”, that tried to stop all of those poor people from voting.)

  3. That “message” from the movie makers is worth $5 a word. I want to pay money to that message for making me smile.

    Also, best/most appropriate use of “LOLOLOLOLOL” I’ve seen all 2008. There is a time and a place, and this my friend was it.

  4. Beefy  |   Posted on Oct 8th, 2008 0

    This reminds me of the time I purchased a ticket to 3:10 To Yuma and received a ticket to Across The Universe instead. THE SCANDAL!!

    The first 10 awful minutes of American Carol were posted online. I will never get those 10 minutes back. *sniff*

  5. Everytime David Zucker makes an excuse for American Carol a terrorist wins.

  6. Susan  |   Posted on Oct 8th, 2008 -1

    This film was hysterical, loved it. It also received a standing ovation from the packed theater audience

  7. Dick  |   Posted on Oct 10th, 2008 0

    Laugh all you want, but it actually did happen to me. I was given two tickets to another movie and didn’t notice until I arrived at the theater number indicated on the tickets. An American Carol was not playing there, and I looked more closely at the tickets. They were for another movie which was playing there. I walked back though the theater complex to the correct theater. After 18 years of attending movies at this theater, this is the only time they made such a mistake. On purpose? Of course it was. No way was this a coincidence.

  8. Bob M  |   Posted on Oct 13th, 2008 0

    As I stated on another website, I saw American Carol on Saturday night. I thought It was funny but not great. I suppose it was on par with other lampoons of its type but I doubt that any movie of this type ever makes a killing at the box office.

    That being said, I was given a ticket stub for a different movie when I purchased tickets for American Carol. I read about the ?ticket fraud? accusation on the internet later that night and I still had the ticket stub in my pocket. Sure enough my ticket was for a different movie. At this theater you buy the ticket and go right in. No one collects the ticket which is in this case just a receipt.

    Was it ticket fraud or a conspiracy? Liberals would have to be mighty desperate to railroad a stupid movie of this type and the pimple faced teenagers behind the counter didn?t look like mad dog liberals.

    Still, it is a strange occurrence considering the other reports.

    PS: For all of you trying to find political relevance in the success or failure of this stupid movie you should consider that all of these lampoon style movies are incredibly silly and outrageous and only appealing to a particular audience. They never do well at the box office. These movies make fun of anything and everything usually in a very irreverent way. You watch, you laugh and you cringe occasionally at the crassness of it all. Only a turd head would think that this movie could help or hurt a political philosophy.

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