This is an email I just received in my INBOX for real in real life.

To: gabe@videogum.com
From: [redacted]@weather.com
Subject: Spend Christmas Day with The Weather Channel

Spend Christmas Day with The Weather Channel

White Christmas Special and Year in Weather Countdown

• Guaranteed White Christmas (9 a.m. – 2 p.m. ET)

TWC forecasts snow in South Texas for the Henderson family, who won the network’s second annual Guaranteed White Christmas contest. The Henderson home in League City, TX, (halfway between Houston and Galveston) will transform into a winter wonderland Christmas morning. TWC will broadcast live as the Hendersons and their three young children wake up to a yard full of snow complete with winter-themed activities for family, friends and neighbors to enjoy. Catch all of the day’s excitement as meteorologist Adam Berg and co-host Mary Cobb report from the event and offer a roundup of the latest Christmas Day forecast to see who else is enjoying snow on Christmas.

•Countdown 2010: The Year in Weather (9 p.m. ET, encore 12 a.m. ET)

Join meteorologists Stephanie Abrams and Mike Bettes as they examine the year’s most memorable weather moments in Countdown 2010: The Year in Weather. This half-hour special will countdown the top 10 biggest weather stories of 2010. From the unbearable heat wave to extreme flooding across the nation and overseas. Tune in as TWC reveals the No. 1 weather story of the year.

I’ve posted my response after the jump.

To: [redacted]@weather.com
From: gabe@videogum.com
Subject: re: Spend Christmas Day with The Weather Channel

No.

Comments (45)
  1. I’d rather spend Christmas with the Kranks.

    • i watched this over the weekend because it was on tv and i thought it’d be “fun” to watch a WMOAT i had read about. it wasn’t fun. it was terrible.

  2. This reminded me of your old blog when you posted an email chain between you and someone trying to get you to adopt their deaf kids? I’m not sure I’ve ever laughed that hard before or since.

  3. Too bad Harry has been dead for 22 years; he probably would have enjoyed the snow.

  4. Bah humbug, Gabe?

  5. they have a channel dedicated to weather??? Well ain’t that something else…

  6. I’ll be watching CSPAN’s “House for the Holidays: Live! From the House of Representatives”. I recommend you check it out–but make sure to have a box of Kleenex nearby! It gets me every time.

  7. I want to meet the people watching a special on the top 10 weather-related events of 2010 at midnight on Christmas and tell them it gets better

  8. There is snow way I will watch that.

  9. Gabe is Ralph Pootawn.

  10. That’s weird, I just got an e-mail from VH-1 Classic in which they invited me to a very special holiday party featuring none other than the Damn Yankees and Mr. Mister. My response? Yes.

  11. Nice try, Weather Channel! I will be watching Lifetime and wondering where my life went wrong…

  12. Maybe we can interest you in a QVC Kwanzaa?

  13. I do not get along with my neighbors and I wouldn’t be very happy if they got to share my winter wonderland. But that’s just me

  14. The poor Henderson family having to host all the jerks from the weather channel all day, AND the whole neighbourhood in exchange for a few buckets of snow.

  15. You know what they say: When you wrestle with the Weather Channel, you get wet with snow.

  16. Uhhh. I’m watching New Years Rockin’ Eve with Dick Clark the Bionic Monster, or whatever.

  17. The most memorable weather events are usually devastating, right? Floods, hurricanes, etc… Why would you want to recount that on Christmas unless they’re just feeding into the Scrooges out there

    • “Before we get to number one, we’re up to our long distance dedication. And this one is about hurricanes, and flooding, and a situation that we can all understand, whether we have had a hurricane, or a flood, or neither…”

      • For some reason, when trying to think of possible fun weather events my mind immediately goes to some Disney Channel Original Movie where there’s a weather machine that makes it snow in an absurdly warm place.

  18. Hey Dustin, on Xmas, do you want to watch The Weather Channel with me?


    Ooooook. Just backing away.

  19. I live in League City and it is the worst. Looks like I am going to be spending my Christmas morning pretending to be this lady’s neighbor so I can build a snow penis army on her front lawn.

  20. This would have never happened if your weather website of choice was thefuckingweather.com. Just sayin’.

  21. thirty-fourth?

  22. And the #1 weather moment of 2010 is: That one day in Philadelphia when the sun was out and the breeze was light enough to lift a few skirts, but not strong enough to do any property damage.

  23. I know what I’m watching on Christmas (while passing arond traditional Aussie Christmas barbecued foodstuffs)
    6.30-7.30 Engineering Disasters
    7.30-8.30 Air Crash Investigation
    8.30-9.30 Mega Disasters
    Quality Christmas programming right there.

  24. I like the phrase “extreme flooding across the nation and overseas”..I mean, at first I thought that excluded Canada and Mexico, but then I remembered we’re talking about extreme flooding.

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