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Chelsea Handler called Gwyneth Paltrow a cunt during a “comedy” performance last weekend. Oof. I mean, that is literally the pot calling the kettle a cunt. Let’s take this fight to the edge of a cliff and see who falls off first. And then see who falls off second. CORRECTION: I accidentally confused Angelina Jolie with Gwyneth Paltrow. Whoops! Whatever. They’re all assholes.
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Whoever wins, we win.
Cunts Will Clash?
catfight
Steve WInwood’s ears perk up and he’s like “yes this is what it all leads up to”
rad take on winwood
Yeah, yeah, yeah, catfight!
To be fair, his ears always look like that.
Paltrow is the worst, but she’s at least done some quality acting work in a couple of movies. Handler just got famous for bedding the President of the E1 Network. Honestly, I have to say I’m on team Paltrow here.
Oh my God. I sided with Paltrow! It’s the 12th sign of the Apocalypse! 2012 is happening early! WikiLeaks was right!
Dammit, Gabe. That correction just made you lose serious points in my health and safety report of Videogum.
“It was Green at Videogum in the 9800 block of South Main.
What have we have. All together, gang:
“LOL, how does anyone outside of Houston get that reference?
I think the real fight here is Handler v. The Definition Of Comedy.
I know we’re not supposed to like her but this gif is adorable and mesmerizing
I still love her. Gabe can’t tell me what to feel!
Looks like we can’t HANDLE Chelsea HANDLEr huh guys?
boo, but I’ll let it slide and assume you were doing your Chelsea Handler impression
next time be drunker and more racist
That was really a paltr(ow)y excuse for a joke.
GWEN ETHryone agrees that this lady is loud and obnoxious, the CHEL SEA what everyone thinks about her.
(Ugh, really? I just did that?)
When people ask if I want to go see some stand up comedy, I say I’ll go to almost any comedians show, but I don’t want to go to Chelsea.
Elvis Costello with the assist, ladies and gentlemen.
You totallly saved that thread, Frank.
Oops, looks like I forgot to excuse myself. Guess me and my awesome jokes are sticking around
so i happen to know Apple’s nanny personally…she is of Indian descent, which further explains why Gwyneth thinks she’s British, because she’s indentures people from India..
Cool namedrop.
Dane cook with boobs.
I’ve been looking for a way to lose some pounds; now with that image in my head, I’ll never eat again. Thanks R2D2, Esq.
“In our language, last names are capitalized, too.” – Western Civilization
I think you mean “comedy BARFormance.”
Team GOOP.
Yes, I know I am always Team GOOP. But it is nice to have the issue be more cut-and-dry for once. Let a lady take her victories where she can!
Chelsea Handler a Loudmouth Comic; Says ‘Cunt’
In other news – Pope Catholic; Bear Shits in Woods; Sky Blue.
More at 11.
breaking huffpo news: videogum calls angelina jolie “gwenyth paltrow,” the most offensive insult in the english language.
I love how they had to mention that Chelsea was friends with Jennifer Aniston–like Angelina couldn’t possibly be a cunt otherwise.
This would have been much funnier if it was Gwyneth Paltrow, so I am going to pretend it is.
This may be because I am in Canada, but that link leads to a story about Chelsea Handler calling Angelina Jolie a cunt. Then again, I didn’t watch the entire video clip, because Chelsea Handler.
“I’ll leave when I’m good and ready.” – Gwyneth Paltrow
But how does Keenan feel about all of this?
Chelsea Handler here. You know, the alcoholic [lololololool.] I’ve been asked to give my opinion on Gweneth Paltrow. She is a cunt.
[am I doing this right?]
- Chelsea Handler
I didn’t know that I could make lots of money calling celebrities bad names.
I do that for free now.
“You’re a cunt now, and you’ve always been a cunt. And the only thing that’s going to change is that you’re going to be an even bigger cunt. Maybe have some more cunt kids.” -Chelsea Handler, I hope.
#ohmanyouguysilovethatmovie
“You’re the cunt now, dawg.” – Sean Connery dressed in drag as Chelsea Handler. Who will be his chewy midget side kick? Jeremy Piven?
Chelsea Handler has provided me with some solid amusement and I thank her for that. The couple I live with have a lot of friends whom they love, but who have the worst taste, so the lead-up to any visit is a sort of pressure release, where the three of us mock said taste so that when the visit does occur, and the visiting friend brings up their terrible taste, we can all nod and feign interest instead of disgust. I like to step back and watch with amusement as glittering eye contact is made between me and the couple, going, “See! See! They like Chelsea Handler, but they are also cool! It’s so weird!”
When I here people say how much they like Dane Cook I find it very hard to control my pretentious self. But I don’t like to be rude and dis anybody’s interests either. The inner turmoil is explosive.
Here, hear, herr, durr? I’m dumb.
I’m pretty good when it comes to actually being in a conversation with someone, unless I think they are joking, but I’ve a really, really tough time not laughing aloud when I overhear someone at a table near me or passing by someone share their terrible taste.
Team Handler. CAUSE I DON’T LIKE ANGELINA JOLIE. For all the same reasons, more or less. And by don’t like, I mean, I AM NOT UNDER HER THRALL.
Speaking of thrall…
Gwyneth is blonde.
Chelsea is blonde.
Gwyneth is friends with “Uncle Jay.”
Chelsea dated 50 Cent.
Gwyneth dated Brad Pitt,
Chelsea is friends with this:
They’re both (all) awful and I’ve already spent too much time thinking about them.
Fact: Gay guys like Chelsea Handler. Deal with it.
P.S. One of the few incontrovertible proofs that Gabe is not gay is his dislike of Chelsea. Who else does he not like that a gay guy would? Betty White. Who else? Help me out.
I’m pretty sure he dislikes Kathy Griffin. And I imagine back in the ’60s he thought The Judy Garland Show show was “the worst.”
But (as a straight female) I’m really on board with his distaste for Chelsea Handler. A few weeks ago I was in an airport bookstore and opened one of her books out of idle curiosity. She was describing how she met this hot guy in a club and went home with him, but then she immediately bolted when saw how small his penis was. And I was like, “you are terrible. I hate you.” Because that’s just rude, and not funny.
I noticed Kathy Griffin was on Chelsea Lately the other night. A two-fer for Gabe!
the gays like her because she’s “such a BITCH” ?? but straight guys find her rough and sour demeanor kind of a turn off. I would not want to park the wood in that skank
Gay guy here:
Chelsea Handler was mildly amusing, but now she’s just the female Perez Hilton. Which doesn’t actually make sense, because I can’t figure out what Perez is.
Verdict- gay guys don’t always like Chelsea Handler.
Does Gabe even want this? He runs a pop culture blog but can’t tell the difference between Paltrow and Jolie? He posts lazy links to your precious huffington post but he doesnt even link to the funniest thing on there today, the latest Kevin Smith vs the airlines industry. Time for Gabe to retire early. Take a permanent vacation. Get the fuck out of town. Go see Jamaica mother fucker. Let your dreadlocks down.
I’m sure he’s got a big write up in progress for the Kevin Smith update.
I’m not so sure. how do we know he won’t confuse kevin smith for Dom Deluise? Just another link to your precious huffington post and call that a blog
A better question is, do you even want this?
depends if you say it like “do you want… thiiiiiissss” and gesture up and down your body if the body is hot or not
hahaha, that was the most incoherent sentence I’ve ever seen! IDIOT!!!
Winwood should at least get some credit for using the term “your precious huffington post” twice in one lifetime
“that is literally the pot calling the kettle a cunt” -rachel zoe
As the token feminist, I’m going to have to point out that the c-word is a really, really awful word with really, really awful connotations and no matter how loathsome a person it’s referring to, it’s still a really, really, terrible thing to say.
Downvote away.
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Morally speaking, I disagree with everything Steve Winwood has said in this thread. But damn it, the man makes me LOL sometimes.
As long as you’re all for the merits of “douche” as an insult, we’re cool.
The popularity of the word douche as an insult is actually a great boon for feminism. Douches, both the objects and the people, are awful things marketed to insecure women which, ultimately, are bad for their vaginas.
You got an upvote from me, anyway.
Like any other loaded word, it’s about the intention and the context. Here, the intention was clearly pretty negative, and, more importantly given the context, not even funny. If you’re a comedian and you can’t do shocking right, you should stop comedy-ing. I can’t imagine having that much actual vitriol for a celebrity, and if she does, she probably shouldn’t be using said celebrity in her set because, again, not funny. #alsoafeminist #cuntcanbefunnytoosometimesbutchelseahandlerneveris