I’m not going to spend too long talking about Daylight Savings Time because one of the first rules of entertainment is to know your audience and I know that my audience, and also EVERY audience, finds discussions of Daylight Savings Time to be BORING. But it sure is getting dark early. Fascinating observation! Seriously, though, it’s draining! Now I see that the bears were right, and we should never have left those caves. WE’VE GOT TO GO BACK TO THE CAVES! Oh well. The one thing that separates us from the bears (the only thing, probably) is our uniquely human ability to turn that frown upside down! The sun has gone down and your butt is cold and you’re bored? USE IT. Boring Movies: The Game.

So:

  • Hurt Bill, Vol. 1
  • Edward Normalhands
  • One Of Tens Of Thousands Of Starfighters
  • Dream On Elm Street
  • You Can’t Count On Me
  • Hurt Bill, Vol. 2

Have fun. NO BEARS ALLOWED.

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Comments (457)
  1. Appropriate Speed, Pussycat! Involuntary Manslaughter! Involuntary Manslaughter!

  2. The Shirt Locker

  3. Toastbusters

  4. Debating Whether Or Not To Look For Nemo

  5. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2: The Secret of the Snooze

  6. Mr. Smith Goes to Walgreens

  7. Walk, lola, walk

  8. Breakable

  9. There Won’t Be Blood

  10. Back to the Food Store

  11. Death Takes A Nap

  12. Catch Me Because You Can

  13. Freddy Got Pointed At

  14. The Day The Earth Kept Moving At Pretty Much The Same Speed That It Normally Does

  15. Mr. Holland’s Lesson Plan

  16. Ferris Bueller’s In Attendance

  17. Rain, Man

  18. To Sir, with Tolerance

  19. Country for Old Men

  20. There Will Be a Slight Bruise

  21. Normal-Sized Fish

  22. Paul Blart: Mall Cop

  23. There’s Nothing About Mary

  24. The Anti-Social Network

  25. Kinda Sorta Almost Famous

  26. Did You Hear The Not Very Interesting Thing About the Morgans?

  27. Scott Pilgrim versus a few inhabitants of a Canadian city

  28. Betelgeuse (the star in Orion)

  29. Some Like it Warm

  30. Bring Me the Hat of Alfredo Garcia

  31. Scott Pilgrim Chooses A Dandruff Shampoo

  32. The Fifth Honda Element

  33. Zzzombieland

  34. Scott Pilgrim vs. the Western Hemisphere

  35. The OK Escape

  36. Me and You and One or Two People We Know

  37. 2 Speed Limit 2 Calm

  38. Lock, Stock, and Two Barrels of Smoked Herring

  39. Book Club

  40. One Wedding and No Funerals

  41. Chill Bill

  42. V for Very Nice

  43. The Tenenbaums

  44. A History of Peace

  45. A History of Passive-Aggressive Behavior

  46. I See You, Man

  47. Where The WIld Things Aren’t

  48. 12 Calm Men

  49. Twelve Mild-Mannered Men

  50. The Uneventful Reign of King George

  51. Middle Gun

  52. Pulp Non-Fiction

  53. Speed 2: Snooze Control

  54. The Hours…and Hours…and Hours

  55. Book Clubs of New York

  56. Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner? Your Uncle Irving; Isn’t That Nice?

  57. She’s Just Not That Into Booze

  58. A Little Tidbit About Eve

  59. The Fly (Is Down)

  60. Boogie Mid-Afternoons

  61. Glourious Children Born of Married Parents

  62. The Even Couple

  63. Peace and Peace

  64. In-MEH-tion

  65. Beauty and the Good-Looking Guy

  66. The Green Kilometer

  67. Shallow Impact

  68. Rubix Cube: the Movie

  69. The English Patience

  70. The Girl with the Dragon Temporary Tatoo

  71. Night of the Resting in Peace Dead

  72. Temporary Overcastery of a Soiled Brainpan.

  73. To Pet a Mockingbird

  74. The Day The Earth Rotated

  75. The Small-to-Medium Lebowski

  76. Mildly Difficult to Stop

  77. American Homeliness

  78. the dark night

  79. Slept quite nicely but had a weird dream about your mother and an ice cream truck, thanks for asking. In Seattle.

  80. Mild Hogs

  81. I Show Respect in Observing Your Grave, Making Sure to Properly Dispose of My Chewing Gum in the Appropriate Receptacle

  82. Butch Cassidy and the Wallflower

  83. Cloudy with a Chance of Rain

  84. Welcome to Leisurely Walking Club. The first rule of Leisurely Walking Club is: you do not talk about Leisurely Walking Club in outside voices. Inside voices only, please. The second rule of Leisurely Walking Club is: you DO NOT talk about Leisurely Walking Club in outside voices! That was almost an outside voice! We have to be civilized, guys. Third rule of Leisurely Walking Club: if someone yells “stop!”, goes limp, or starts to breathe heavily, the leisurely walk must be stopped. Fourth rule: only two guys to a lane. Park gets crowded, you guys. Wouldn’t want stubbed toes, would we? Fifth rule: one step at a time, fellas. Sixth rule: the walks must be conducted comfortably. No ties, no sports jackets. Charter Club polos are allowed. Seventh rule: walks will go on as long as it is comfortable. And the eighth and final rule: if this is your first time at Leisurely Walking Club, then you have to introduce yourself!

  85. Friday the 9th

  86. Serf of the Rings: The Oppressed Working Class of the Ring

  87. Birdspotting

  88. Snakes Stored Safely In Locked Containers On A Plane

  89. Being John McCain

  90. Slumdog Hundredaire

      • Did not mean to reply to this… but let’s see if I can save face:

        Das Boot starred Jurgen Prochnow
        Jurgen Prochnow was in The Da Vinci Code
        The Da Vinci Code was directed by Ron Howard
        Ron Howard directed Angels and Demons
        Angels and Demons starred Ewen McGregor
        Ewen Macgregor was in Trainspotting
        Trainspotting was directed by Danny Boyle
        Danny Boyle directed Slumdog Millionaire.

        Damn, nailed it!

        • i want this to be a BNPG: give FLW two movies that are nothing alike and see what happens!

          • Slumdog Millionaire was directed by Danny Boyle.
            Danny Boyle directed Trainspotting.
            Trainspotting starred Ewan McGregor.
            Ewan McGregor was in Angels and Demons.
            Angels and Demons was directed by Ron Howard.
            Ron Howard directed Apollo 13.
            Apollo 13 featured KEVIN BACON.

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