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For years people have been worrying about a Robot Uprising, when clearly there was an entirely separate uprising that we should have been way more concerned with. See you in the Tween Army-Mandated Internment Camps. We’re going to be forced to make bedazzled Dora the Explorer Blackberry Storm bumper covers at tiny-slouchy-stiletto-heel-point until our fingers slough off! (Thanks for the tip, Adam Christou.)
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It sure is windy in the Jiffy-Lube stockroom
These kids are at least seven years away from being old enough to drive a car. I guess they decided to make a music video while waiting for dad to get his oil changed?
So mom was filming then? Bleak.
In Soviet Russia, cat longs for YOU – Yakov Smirnoff
Wait! CRAP. I’ll see myself out.
That video hurt my soul. Then Chris Hansen came and told me to have a seat even though I was already sitting at my desk.
My facial expression while watching this video:
http://www.opposingviews.com/attachments/0008/1704/Don-Draper.jpg?1282717366
Try, try again.
I already have a favorite Borges.
I think I have chosen wisely.
Any life is made up of a single moment, the moment in which a man finds out, once and for all, why he is watching kids sing pop songs. It is not a pretty moment.
- Jorge luis Borges
The Garden of Forking…what the Fork???
“I owe the discovery of “Can’t Be Tamed” to the conjunction of a mirror and an encyclopedia.” –Gaby Borges, “Cyrus, Bieber, Ke$ha Tertius”
“Art always opts for the individual, the concrete; art is dancing in front of hubcaps.” – Borges via Zune text
Favorite Borge:
Favorite Borg:
What about your favorite Bor?
and your favorite Bo?
My favorite B
I’d say my favorite Bo is Robo-Bo, the robot Bo Duke manservant.
Thats why I remembered Bo Duke, I have the Robo-Bo parts of the episode stuck in my head. And now I’m watching it again.
how is it that this is totally cool and will probalby run on the Disney Channel 20 times a day, but a fairly standard [sadly] magazine spread of people in their mid-20s who happen to play high schoolers is downright pornography!
#doublestandardsgum
Something something over-sexualisation of young girls!
#mumsnetgum
Can’t be smenged!
I like the two token dude dancers. And how one WANTS IT so much more than the other.
some people step up 2 the streets, some get left sitting on the curb.
Some people are streets ahead.
Hercules Tires – The tires for windowless vans!
Free lollypops! Inquire inside!
It feels like Rand Paul just stomped on my head.
That was a really good commercial for Hercules Tires.
damn
She’s pretty.
Nope, that was funny. Please accept this upvote as a token of my gratitude.
Three options: 1.) I genuinely think she’s pretty, 2.) I just want to make the monster’s ball, or 3.) i decided to just put the phrase out there without adding some extra joke to clarify in order to see what happens.
WHAT LAYER OF DREAM IS THIS?!?!?
Well now I just don’t know what to do. Do I upvote you, as I actually chuckled at that? But if you did it to make Monster’s Ball, that would hurt your chances! After much internal debate, I think I’ve found a way to upvote you without taking away your EGOT attempt:
I downvoted you, if only to teach you the harsh lesson that in life you can almost never have your facetaco and eat it too.
#toughlovegum
also:
#ifeelawfulsomeonepleaseupvotehimgum
“More like ‘Baby Gorges,’ amirite?” –Roman Polanski
“More like ‘Gabe is Gorges’, amirite?” -Monsters
“More like ‘Ithaca is Gorges’, amirite?” -Some t-shirt
I have that t-shirt
This is the best Hercules Tire commercial I have ever seen.
Who knew there was such tire buying power in the F10-17 demo
Ha ha! We’ve just been viral marketed to by Chinese tire manufacturers trying to think of a way to recoup losses due to recent tariff hikes. In two years we will be clamoring to watch her 3D autobiographic cinema verite mockumentary concert film co starring a jive-talking cg Michelin man.
“Gaby Borges OR Miley Cyrus”?!
WHY MUST YOU MAKE ME CHOOSE, BING?
Gaby Borges or Miley Cyrus?
- Roman Polanski
The adults that funded this video should be burned in a tire fire.
Hey! My uncle died in a tire fire. Well it was more of a general kind of fire. And it was actually ice. Actually my uncle is ice-t. Well, really he is Arnold Palmer. And he’s not actually my uncle.
So offensive!
Your uncle made this video
Andy Warhol made this video?
#missingstepsgum
The autotuning’s just as bad as the lipsyncing. I never thought that both could be as bad as each other.
I’ll never complain about Will Smith’s kids ever again.
I just hope that when I put my Autumn Jams playlist on shuffle, this song and “Lemme Smang It” never play back-to-back.
For fear of dancing your ass off, right? Too much awesome at once?
You need that ass for smanging (what?)
“I danced my leg off” – Liam Neeson
“I whipped my hair back and forth.”
- Will Smith’s spawn
for halloween, i am going as a silly band shaped like my mixed emotions about little girls dancing next to hubcaps.
I’m an outcast, so I’m going to spend Halloween just playing my silly band videogame at home by myself and pretending like I have actual silly bands that I traded with my friends that aren’t just imaginary.
This just proves that Damon Albarn doesn’t understand the positive creative influence shows like American Idol and Glee are having on the biz.
Child Taming in America: Can it Be Done? No.
Child Taming in America: Find out who’s taming your pre-teen tonight at 11.
Come on down to Queen Tire! Where our Discounting Madness can’t be tamed!
Why are those 2 boys behind the chain link fence in some of the scenes…? That’s a heavy metaphor that I can’t even begin to crack.
thisismynightmare
Um, did I miss the part where they explained why her tights have math symbols on them?
i’m pretty sure there were punctuation marks too. i’m VERY sure i want to own them.
That awkwardly long baby peace sign at the begining
reminded me of something…
????
ahhhh yes
Oh man, you should have just looped the .gif after she changed hands. But thank you for this, beat part of that video for real.
I can’t take credit for the gif….a couple of people posted it in the original thread about that video. But I can take credit for loving it very very much.
This isn’t specific to this video, but why do all of these 11 year old boys agree to be backup dancers? I can’t even imagine what I would have said if someone explained this to me at 11 and asked: “are you in?”
Willow Smith’s best friend, “whipping hair back and forth” category
braces or grill? i honestly can’t tell.
i miss when kids would dance like this:
It’s good to see Stephanie Tanner doing something wholesome in leg warmers…those crystal meth stories bring the sads.
But we can all agree that Stephanie Tanner (the character, not Jodie Sweetin the actress) was the worst, right? I mean, ugh. I hated that she was the one my age.
Agreed. She’s my age too, of course we got the awkward middle child with the “how rude!” catch phrase.
Remember Judy from Family Matters? She was our age too, and they just magically didn’t have a daughter named Judy after a few seasons. Then she did porn, Oprah and Celebrity Rehab.
Ugh. Being 28-30 is the worst.
Our sub-generation is destined for greatness.
I believe you mean Step-on-me Tanner.
Remember the episode when she wanted to be called “Dawn” and everybody was like, “Yeah, whatever Don.” And I was like, “Yeah, whatever. I hope Uncle Jesse has a freak motorcycle accident, plows through the living room wall and paralyzes you from the neck up so you can’t talk anymore.”
HA! Remember the episode where Stephanie had a freak classic car accident and actually did plow through the kitchen wall?
“If you have a guitar at the beginning of the video, you better play it by the end.” – Anton Chekhov
I made it 14 seconds. There are certain levels of creepiness that I just can’t take.
If I have one complaint about Miley Cyrus, it’s that she’s definitely too old now to be gyrating in music videos singing about how she can’t be tamed. Thank goodness they thought to update this song for the younger generation.
braceface
Occasionally, being dyslexic really enhances a shi**y experience. Thank you Baby Gorges.
“This (video) gives me migraine”.
-Gang of Four
I’ve been listening to Gaby Borges since she was a zygote.
#gotojailgum