Oh great. Now it’s all of a sudden gay for a grown man to drink a bunch of juice boxes every day? (Just kidding.) (That has always been very gay.) (Am I right, PARTY BOYZ?) (Thanks for the tip, Mans.)

Comments (76)
  1. Going to UrbanDictionary now to look up “garden of roses”. Will report back.

  2. Man, Snoop has been sipping on juice for like 20 years now. He’s gotta at LEAST a level 82 gaylord by now.

  3. Buster better watch out!

  4. Fake and gay, right? Right.

  5. woozefa  |   Posted on Sep 22nd, 2010 +13

    meh. i’ve been telling people this for years.

  6. If he was gay from drinking out of juice boxes, then he’d know full well that that color yellow he’s wearing does nothing for his complexion.

  7. Fluoride in water?! It must be to make me gay, not to strengthen teeth!

  8. No duh, Alex Jones.

  9. Last night I drank a Capri Sun before going to the bathhouse. The evidence is incontrovertible.

  10. This is precisely why my future children will drink nothing but Capri Sun. The cumbersome, estrogen-free packaging not only encourages the development of fine motor skills but also doesn’t make you gay.

  11. I thought eating da poo poo made you gay. I guess I’ve been doing this the hard way :(

  12. No wonder I made out with that guy after I ate a whole bag of Fritos…

    • So wait it’s CRISPS and juice that make you gay ? I had been eating what you in the colonies call “fries”.
      I wondered why I wasn’t enjoying the gay sex as much as I’d hoped.

  13. I thought being vehemently anti-gay made you gay?

  14. I imagine he has yeast elsewhere too.

  15. of COURSE this tip came from mans. mans is our nation’s authority on the quiet suffering of intellectual southerners.

  16. Exhibit A: Faygo

  17. Alex Jones (along with Glenn Beck) is just so ridiculous, I have a very hard time believing it’s not just some elaborate scam. Are they not both Millionaires?

  18. “I have the government documents…but instead of looking at those, let’s look at the inside of this juice box.”

  19. Friggin’ CHiPs!

  20. chips + juice = diabeetus

    chips + juice = gay

    diabeetus = gay

    i should’ve known wilford brimley is a homosexual. all this Hawaiian Punch is throwing off my gaydar.

  21. I’m ready to close your YouTube video!

  22. This guy knows what you’re talking about.

  23. So now going out and having a baby is a gay thing. Is there any sacred institution the gays can’t corrupt?

  24. For some reason, the phrase “I want some chips and juice, no homo” is endlessly amusing to me

  25. Says the guy with the Mike’s Hard Lemonade ad in the background.

  26. There is nothing I love more than having babies in my garden of roses with my short skirt, lipstick & make-up on. Damn juice.

  27. Remember when the Don’t Tread On Me flag was kind of badass? I mean, we seriously used to have a flag with a fucking rattlesnake on it! Nike did some great ads/merchandise for the US Soccer team using it a few years back.

    But now it’s the emblem of the “where’s the birth certificate, anti-gay juice box” crowd? Sigh.

  28. Dude is trying to tell us something here. I think he’s been struggling with some confusing feelings and doesn’t really know who to blame. It’s kinda sweet how he thinks it’s his juice and his chips. Just give in to it already!

  29. I wonder how much juice Larry Craig had to drink before he started tap dancing in airport bathrooms…

  30. While this guy is fun to make fun of, his ridiculous brand of hate has consequences. By now you’re familiar with the Billy Lucas story. I can’t get over how great the “It Gets Better Project” from Dan Savage is. The best revenge against juice and chip gayizing provocateurs is living well. Contribute if you have a story.

    http://www.youtube.com/itgetsbetterproject

  31. If you’re looking for a good time, look no further than New York’s hottest club, The Juice Box…

  32. So while there are many upsetting/dumb things in this video, all I kept thinking was “Who drinks water out of a can?”

  33. “Radio personality Alex Jones recently stated on air that the plastic lining in juice boxes contains estrogen and is responsible for turning people into homosexuals. Did you hear about this? Now it makes sense why they call these things fruit drinks.”

    With that, I’ll just be leaving…

  34. HEB is the greatest grocery of all time.

    I used to love laughing (along?) at Alex Jones’ show, but if he hates on HEB he is dead to me.

  35. CHIPS AND JUICE were an inside job

  36. This must be why I always slut it up after a juicy juice. Thank you for giving me an excuse to be a whore. IT’S THE CHEMICALS!

  37. Oh man, Liz Lemon must be so gay.

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