Legless cat is so chill! I heard that one time, legless cat fell asleep in the ocean and that’s how Hawaii was invented. I heard that Jack Johnston stole all his songs from legless cat. I heard that if you smoke legless cat, you get high like when you smoke marijuana. I heard that legless cat rides to work on a longboard. I heard that all of legless cat’s clothes are made out of fleece. I heard that you’re not allowed to wear shoes in legless cat’s house, not even into the foyer, you have to leave them on a tatami outside. I heard if you listen to legless cat’s chest with a stethoscope, instead of a heartbeat you hear “Good Vibrations.” I heard that if you enter legless cat’s shared-dream state to incept an idea into legless cat’s dream-safe, you don’t want the kick, because her dreams are sooooo chilllllllll. (Via Arbroath.)

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Comments (71)
  1. Who is Jack Johnston? Is that the poor man’s Jack Johnson?

  2. One time me and legless cat were on our way back from Taco Bell, and he takes this massive bong rip while we pull up right next to a cop. He held that hit in for 45 seconds while the light was red, and as soon as the cop pulls away he coughs and says, “bro pump that slightly stoopid.”

    • A couple of years back I’m hanging out at legless cat’s condo about to play Pet Sounds from my iPod and legless cat’s like, “Nah, bro, if you’re going to listen to that masterpiece, we need to break out the vinyl. The tones are so much warmer and the whole experience is like, ah man, it’s like a ritual.”

      Legless cat taught me a lot that summer.

    • That’s funny because this other time I was riding in the passenger seat of legless cat’s ’69 Camaro, passing a joint back in forth. Legless cat was rather drunk, and he’s driving on the wrong side of the road. As the cop behind us flips on his lights, legless cat looks me dead in the eye, and says “don’t say a fuckin word.” Legless cat slowly lowers his window, and as smoke billows out, he says to the cop, “sorry officer. I didn’t know I couldn’t do that.” The cop replies, “of course you can’t do that! Now get the fuck outta here!” As legless cat pulls away, laughing maniacally, he says, “it’s funny Lyle, because I did know I couldn’t do that!”

  3. Am I the only person who felt bad for noticing the legless cat was in “Mobile”?

    Poor cat. :[

  4. I heard that the hours fly by when waiting in line in Comic-Con’s Hall H if you’re with legless cat because his stories about hanging out with John Belushi and Bill Murray are not only funny, they make you think, too.

  5. This cat was the best part of “Kids”.

  6. I don’t think this cat wants a cheeseburger. I think it just wants its legs back.

  7. Really shows you what’s important.

    Legs.

  8. Oh man, they should do an interview with the family of that mouse she caught. He is probably such a disappointment.

  9. http://www.loleglesscats.com is not taken yet. Someone should probably get on that stat.

  10. Legless cat is the real hero.

  11. I dont understand the chilled out brah theme of this post!

    I am missing something very basic I’m sure.

  12. Does this mean we can finally have a video for the Jingle Cats version of Metallica’s “One?”

  13. That cat has suicide on the brain.

  14. “Legless Cat taught me everything I know.”
    – Keyboard Cat

  15. Hmm
    Don’t ask me why, but the cosmos had me looking at disabled animals and their cuteness and stunrff in overcoming adversity/differences/racism.
    I fount these.
    Wheely The Pup


    and the BIONIC CAT

  16. okay. maybe im just a loser but i feel horribley depressed after watching this video. fuck.

  17. Wait, what is going on with the font here? Anyone? Am I the only one seeing this Courier New bologna?

  18. stupid electric trees.

  19. Science: “Hmm, COULD we, and SHOULD we? You know what? I forgot what the second question was. Let’s keep this cat around because we can.”

  20. I gotta get me some of these newfangled Wee Wee Pads. BYE BYE TOILET!

  21. I thought she was using wee wee pad as just a euphemism but these things really exist.

    $33.95 for the 100 pack…

  22. Gabe’s girlfriend sure likes to talk baby talk to cats!

  23. “Whenever I feel too hyped up, I just call Legless Cat and he brings me back to Earth.” –J Mascis.

  24. “But you ain’t got no legs, Lieutenant Cat” -Gorrest Fump

  25. All he needs is the fedora.

  26. Cats from Arrakis are always so cute.

  27. Signed in to say longboards are awesome.

  28. i really have nothing to add to this except to say, i can only hope that one day i will be able to adopt a special needs pet. and film it and laugh at it and squeeze it.

  29. More like overcome adversity cat.

  30. Legless Cat did not “even catch a mouse one time”. I think one time a veterinarian aide thought it would be really cool if Legless Cat caught a mouse one time.

  31. BIIIIIILLLLLLLLLL BRAAASSSSSKKKKY! that son of a bitch!

  32. legless cat for prez!

  33. Legless cat loves the high school girls. He gets older, they just stay the same age.

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