gabe: who is worse for the country
gabe: sarah palin or serena van der woodsen?
lindsay: Well definitely Palin.
gabe: no, i mean as president
gabe: just kidding
gabe: a serena van der woodsen presidency
gabe: though
gabe: would be something special
gabe: i mean, the world would end
gabe: but it would be so boring and cloying first!
lindsay: Blair is like her Cheney
gabe: serena van der woodsen is the worst
gabe: i think you’re probably right that sarah palin is worse for the country
lindsay: I love that the fictional character you think is the worst has this really complicated name that you know how to spell by heart.

gabe: but i think that little girls looking up to sarah palin is better than little girls looking up to serena van der woodsen
gabe: i’m sorry, did i just BLOW YOUR MIND
lindsay: Well, that is probably true
lindsay: She has clearly passed on valuable in-a-pinch baby hair styling skills to her offspring.
lindsay: And she can protect them from wolves
gabe: as long as they’re all in a plane together
gabe: chasing the wolf
gabe: they’ll be safe
gabe: from that wolf
lindsay: why just wolves?
lindsay: why are they singled out?
lindsay: there should be a rule that you can do that, but you have to use a bow and arrow from the plane
gabe: or there should be a rule that you can’t do that
gabe: that would also be a worthwhile rule
lindsay: I will say that when I first heard of it
lindsay: I thought that it sounded really fun
lindsay: I mean, with a robot instead of a wolf maybe?
lindsay: The zombie of one of the wolves killed by Sarah Palin in the past would be a better president.
gabe: well that is not true
gabe: maybe a better vice president
lindsay: Amy Poehler’s character in Baby Mama.
lindsay: (which why isn’t there a mashup yet with Palin as Tina Fey called Baby Gramma?)
gabe: who is worse for the country, sarah palin or kathy lee gifford?
lindsay: Actually I’m starting to like Kathie Lee Gifford but I’ve been afraid to tell you because I know you’ll be mad.
lindsay: So Palin
gabe: i think they’re dead even
gabe: i think they both are working hard to crush people beneath their feet to fill some kind of vaccuum in their terrible hearts
lindsay: You know who would have been a better than Palin?
lindsay: Cathy Geiss, Don Geiss’s daughter on 30 Rock
lindsay: That’s basically who she is anyway.
gabe: i don’t think that a second tier side character from a sitcom should be the vice president of the united states
gabe: i know that’s a controversial position
gabe: but i’m going on the record as having it
lindsay: until last week she was more famous!
gabe: again, that is not true
gabe: your belief in the popular embrace of second-tier 30 Rock side characters is way out of proportion with reality
lindsay: Maybe if mccain palin win, and something happens to mccain, and then something happens to palin, Tina Fey can be president like in the movie Dave!
lindsay: We’ve never been closer to the dream of Tina Fey for president!
gabe: i think you need to watch Dave again
gabe: and by watch Dave again
gabe: i mean read a book on how government works
lindsay: It works like the movie Dave.
lindsay: is it worse for the country
lindsay: or would be a worse president
lindsay: I guess I should have been clear on that by now
gabe: worse for the country
gabe: also you know she’s not running for president, right?
lindsay: hahahahahahahaha
lindsay: yes
lindsay: ok, Sarah Palin or Russell Brand?
gabe: i don’t think that russell brand
gabe: has explained himself to America
gabe: he’s still an unknown
lindsay: He’s explained himself enough to me.
gabe: ?
gabe: that’s not a position
lindsay: TWSS
gabe: he’s explained himself enough to you for what?
lindsay: For me to not like him!
gabe: so you want to vote for sarah palin
gabe: that’s what you’re saying
gabe: you love sarah palin
lindsay: I am very curious about the moment when she takes off her glasses, lets down her hair, shakes it out and everyone gasps and says “Why, Ms-Ms Palin! You’re beautiful!”
lindsay: All she needs is Anna Faris’s character from The House Bunny
lindsay: Not that a bunch of nerds aren’t already hate jerking off about her already.
lindsay: Sarah Palin or Al Roker
lindsay: Would you rather Sarah Palin be VP or have to spend a day of fun in the park with a frisbee with Al?
gabe: i would rather spend a day in the park with Al Roker than have Sarah Palin be vice president
gabe: al roker is too mediocre to do any serious damage to the american way of life
gabe: he lacks the strength of conviction to do anything other than make awkward jokes and miss the point
gabe: all the time
gabe: always missing the point, that one
lindsay: He just wants to be loved and accepted.
lindsay: He’s just a little boy who wants love.
lindsay: And instead you’re mean to him
gabe: al roker is the reason george bush has been president for 8 years
gabe: it’s that same “aw shucks, at least he’s trying” attitude towards people in position of power and influence that is destroying this country
lindsay: I would hardly call George Bush a person in a position of power and influence!
lindsay: (see what I did there?)
gabe: that’s stupid, don’t say stupid things
gabe: say smart things
gabe: you’re a smart lady
lindsay: I started to say al roker
lindsay: anyway
lindsay: nevermind
lindsay: you don’t understand my subversive comedy
gabe: OK
gabe: i’m sorry i don’t get your comedy
gabe: all joking aside, sarah palin is the worst
lindsay: Well, what about the speech-slurring skelator in the room?
lindsay: Cindy McCain?
lindsay: She would be so much worse
gabe: well
gabe: i mean, joe francis would make a terrible president, too
gabe: but cindy mccain’s not actually running for anything
gabe: other than grim reaper
gabe: her campaign for grim reaper is going strong
gabe: she’s 17 points ahead of harry dean stanton
lindsay: If palin is VP, mccain should stay really far away from the grim reaper
lindsay: Joe Francis is the One
lindsay: he’s the One Who Is Worse
gabe: i think cindy mccain prefers to reap the souls of orphans and wastrels
gabe: joe francis and sarah palin in 2012
gabe: putting the nightmare back in washinightmaregton

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Comments (4)
  1. I have no problem with Russel Brand. There I said it.
    This might change Sunday night.

  2. best friday night fight ever.

    “gabe: i think they both are working hard to crush people beneath their feet to fill some kind of vaccuum in their terrible hearts”

  3. Gabe wins for “17 points ahead of harry dean stanton”.

  4. hey guys! when your brain fights will come to an end? will you someday say to each other “hey,you, it seems to me i loveyou”?)

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