I still cannot get over the Alvin Greene thing. In the comments thread on that post, Godsauce tries to argue that this is a legitimate outcome from a primary election. Incredible argument! You have to be kidding, though, right, Godsauce? I mean, politics are complicated, or whatever, but as a human being alive in the world in 2010, I find it inconceivable that an unemployed felony defendant with absolutely no campaign visibility whatsoever simply “won” a primary election in the race for the United States Senate. Come on! Give me a break! I’m not saying that he is for sure a Republican plant, or that it was a concerted and magically-discrete “get out the vote” campaign in a state that doesn’t require party-registration in its primary elections, but the idea that this is simply a thing that happens seems, basically, impossible. The only check that he ever wrote from his checking account (which has $114 in it) was to get his name on the ballot?! “Normal” — Godsauce. The weirdest part, of course, is how badly Alvin Greene seems to wish he wasn’t involved in the race at all, and yet how resolutely he refuses to drop out. I am telling you, this whole thing is an incredible mystery.

Speaking of comments and arguments and politics and mysteries: after the jump, the five Highest Rated Comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated Comment, the winner of this week’s Sad Keanu Caption Contest, and the Editor’s Choice:

This Week’s Highest Rated Comments

#5 ElectricKoala | Jun 7th Score:104

Ok, Got It you Guys!

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Sad Keanu Reeves
#4 ohthehorrorofitall | Jun 7th Score:107

Though he knew they were just a part of the Matrix, Keanu missed Rue and Gary every minute of every day.

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Sad Keanu Reeves
#3 mydaughter’sname69 | Jun 7th Score:108

This lack of potable drinking water is making me thirsty.

Posted in: Seinfeld Is Now A Crime Against Humanity, Basically
#2 Aaaaron | Jun 7th Score:148

“First bears steal our picnic baskets, now our picnic tables? Damn that Yogi Bear!”

Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Sad Keanu Reeves

Ed. note: As you can see, the special acknowledgement of this week’s Caption Contest winner is presented as part of our regular acknowledgement programming, since the Caption Comment dominated this week’s Ball. (Congratulations, Abalogariz. You earned it!) Good work, everyone. Sad Keanu is so sad it’s crazy!

This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment

#1 shoogyboom | Jun 7th Score:-28
You suck at Photoshop. But I upvoted you for the concept!
Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Sad Keanu Reeves

Ed. note: If this is the Lowest Rated Comment of the week, then we must have had a VERY friendly week! I will also reiterate my sentiments of last week’s Monsters’ Ball (and then I will stop iterating this, because at a certain point we must move forward) but it is nice to see a certain someone’s long-standing reign over this section come to an end, and it is also nice to see that same person become a more positive and interesting member of the commenting community!

This Week’s Editor’s Choice

KajusX & Chainsaws | Jun 10th Score:16

I would gladly renew the Cleveland Show an infinite number of seasons and syndicate it on every channel if someone could make all that oil go away.

Posted in: Duh Aficionado Magazine: BP Can Go Fuck Itself

Ed. note: Amen.

Comments (149)
  1. Woohoo, I have made it into Monster’s Ball, my primary goal in life has now been achieved, now I can focus on getting a job and moving out of my parents basement.

  2. I think you misquoted me.

    • as the girl said to the soldier

    • Also, it wasn’t a nomination for the US Senate. It was a nomination for the US House. There is a very big difference, especially in out-party races against secure seats.

    • OKAY I’M GOING TO get some shit FOR THIS, and I fully ACCEPT it.

      I AM sorry, Gabe, but I FIND THE POST on this fairly REDUCTIVE AND petty. You took A COMMENT on a political RACE IN ANOTHER state that WAS IN NO WAY inflammatory AND WAS, IN fact, MERELY constructive and THEN ATTEMPTED to make Godsauce LOOK like AN unintelligent Tea Party member. I think IT’S FAIR to say it’s fairly SHADY, YES, but I think it echoes a CURRENT DISILLUSIONMENT of the CAPABILITIES of our own governments and CORPORATIONS. Godsauce’s comment WAS NOWHERE near the level OF STUPIDITY you made it seem to be–which I UNDERSTAND IS part of the joke–but I feel IT BOTH unnecessary and harsh to DEDICATE A POST that is usually USED TO TALK about how much YOU LIKE everyone on here to PUBLICLY RIDICULE a long standing and respected member OF THIS COMMUNITY. I feel that, IF THE COMMENT WARRANTED a rebuttal, IT COULD HAVE been made in the THREAD RATHER than writing a post ACCUSING SOMEONE of foolishness for SIMPLY NOT putting on a tin foil hat.

      I know THIS IS GABE’S blog and he WRITES the rules, but I just THINK A LITTLE more digression SHOULD HAVE been applied. But I still GREATLY LOVE this site and will CONTINUE reading it. SO THANKS.

      • Can we make sure this comment gets noticed on the Monsters’ Ball?

      • Gabe, I also find this post inappropriate.

        I also am surprised by this commenter thread. Usually Monsters are good at calling out trolling.

      • We all love Godsauce, and appreciate that his political beliefs often skew more conservative than the average monster. However, believing that the Alvin Greene thing is all above board is patently ridiculous and deserves ridicule. Sorry man, but in this case Godsauce is the one putting on the tin foil hat, not the other way around.

        • Andy, my QUALM ISN’T with any of the POLITICS OF THE situation or what the REALITY OF THE situation even is. My ISSUE IS THAT the entire post was A DISAPPOINTING, UNCALLED for diatribe against A COMMENTER who had no place WITHIN the ball. I’m merely POINTING OUT that if we’re GOING TO LAUGH AT Godsauce’s beliefs, they should be LAUGHED AT IN THE comments; an entire BLOG POST shouldn’t be spun to spurn a single individual. It just SEEMS, AS I said, a little MEAN.

        • I never said that the whole thing was above board. It is very strange and very suspicious. There is currently no evidence of anything fishy, but I wouldn’t be at all surprised if something surfaces that shows that the filing fee was paid for illegally or that finance disclosure requirements were not met.

          The earlier comments also had nothing to do with my personal politics. My point was that the fact of this guy’s winning a landslide victory against a person who has been touted as a known and established Democratic presence demonstrates larger problems for the party. It does. There was no apparent campaign on his behalf, and yet he won. Even if he was getting votes from across the aisle, there would need to be some kind of campaign to get those voters to the polls.

          I’m no stranger to making mistakes. Earlier in this thread I make the mistake of saying that this was a House race rather than a Senate race, and I feel pretty silly about that. But I can and do stand by everything I said in the earlier post. I don’t mind being called out. I just wish my comments had been properly represented.

          • You’re still not getting it. Your assumption that the vote itself was legitimate is the ridiculous and hilarious part.

            As for AnAmPat, duly noted. Though I respectfully disagree.

          • Andy, there is nothing ridiculous about assuming the legitimacy of a vote, even a very strange vote, absent evidence of its illegitimacy. As it happens, there is now some credible, though inconclusive, evidence that suggests precinct-level vote tampering, and I would not be surprised if that evidence is borne out. If it is, then I will accept it and condemn those responsible.

            As it happens, my level of skepticism regarding the validity of the vote itself was never really a topic of discussion. In fact, the notion of Greene as a plant and the possibility of election fraud are separate, if related, issues. I continue to seriously doubt that the results were due to massive Republican crossover, although I’m sure there was some of that going on. Crossover voting does not make the results illegitimate, and it defies credibility to suggest that it was happening on a scale necessary to explain the results.

            The possibility of ballot stuffing seems more likely, though until that charge is proven, I’ll reserve judgment. Usually a healthy level of skepticism leads me to be reluctant to embrace charges of conspiracy just because things are “super” weird and suspicious. It also allows me to change positions when the evidence points toward a different conclusion. If you think that I deserve ridicule for this stance, feel free to point and laugh until you are satisfied that I have been properly shamed.

      • I am gonna hop on AnAmPat’s wagon here and agree. My first thought after reading this entry was, “Why didn’t Gabe just reply to Godsauce in that thread?” There’s no need to try and call him out in a MB post. Poor form.

      • Damnit, I come to Videogum for trampoline accidents, not political discourse.

  3. Howzabout Gabe’s top 5 ice creamovie flavors?! That post was commenter heaven and I want to RElive it.

    • Agreed! You monsters really outdid yourself with Icecream Movies. I’ve been laughing at joefry’s/Max’s “You Got Soft Served” all week.

  4. I can’t believe the only way I can make it into the Monsters’ Ball is by being the lowest-rated comment. But congrats to ohthehorrorofitall (who is my friend IRL) for being the #4 highest-rated! Note to self: The loyalty of Videogum monsters is not to be underestimated. It is to be estimated!

  5. Congrats Abalogariz! Look at you, raising the bar, 200+ upvotes. Are there even that many monsters or are you in cahoots with good ole Alvin Greene?

  6. Abalogariz | Posted on Jun 7th +13
    Actually, i would feel guilty about winning with this since I didn’t make it. I know you’re not the type of people who reward shameless copy-pasting.

    You had us wrong all along Abalogariz. Hit Girl Should go to jail tho. Oil spill.

  7. I wish I had $114

  8. Well done, everyone! Does anyone know what the record for upvotes is? That’s the first I’ve seen that’s broken 200.

  9. I’m just so sad i missed most of this week, especially the the best new party game. I was too busy camping… booooo.
    Just kidding. Kamping roxx.

  10. Hey everyone, let’s all root for AMERICA tomorrow in the World Cup. Even though I’ve never watched soccer before, I am still excited and hope to see some of this:

  11. Darn you Abalogariz… I can’t remember even breaking 100

  12. Does this mean there’s no Movie Club assignment this weekend?

    • Meh, I have to save up my money for Toy Story 3 next week anyways. (And yes, I AM very poor)

    • I’m guessing Gabe is as torn about the A Team as the rest of us, because Bradley Cooper and Rampage have said jerky things in interviews, Sharlito has only made one movie that any of us have seen, and um Liam Neeson is the man I have nothing bad to say about him

      • If your torn about the A-Team, we can always talk about the electric chemistry between Jayden and Jackie in Karate Kid on Monday.

        • “Jack…It…Off!”
          To jail, Mr. Chan!

          • The trailer for this movie was on last night and they play a clip of Jackie Chan telling Jayden Smith, “Jacket on!” and I wondered how they could not realize the jokes they were setting up. Thinking about it again, though, it may just be an homage to the original film’s “wax off” innuendo.

        • Jayden Smith was on Letterman promoting the movie last week, and was the second guest after Harry Connick Jr, who was funny and entertaining no doi. However Jayden was another box of bananas completely…He came out acting way too cool for school, which, I guess was fitting since he doesn’t go to school, he “acts”, but he started trying little sarcastic weird jabs at Dave that werent very jabby or even sarcastic, just awkward and pretentious. After about three minutes of this spankable behavior Dave had it with Johnny-too-cool and asked him “If he smokes” which was just great. Really great.

          • I know I’m not supposed to say this because I’m an adult, but God I hate that kid. And I’m really pissed at Will and Jada for repeatedly trying to force their brat on us, not that I ever thought they were above those types of shenanigans.

  13. OMG! I’ve never made it into Monster’s Ball before! I’d like to thank the monster academy, my agent who always believed in me, and you monsters so very much! Definitely going to drive home in my half-car, and celebrate this achievement! Yay!

  14. I feel like I won the Academy Awards! In fact, this is BETTER than winning the Academy Awards!

  15. how can a post with no caption win a “why don’t you caption it” contest?

    unlike it is Dr. Jack Shepard, a vague, unclear answer will not be acceptable to me.

  16. As I mentioned on the Sad Keanu YCMIT post, I wanna try to have a NE monster meet-up (If only to show those Chicago, Texas and NY meet -ups what’s up!), but I don’t really know how many monsters are around here. I know of 5 right now (and Mans is moving here this fall so we could do something for him/her).

    So, I was wondering if we could do a sort of NE monster roll-call because friendship and pizza.

  17. “…but it is nice to see a certain someone’s long-standing reign over this section come to an end, and it is also nice to see that same person become a more positive and interesting member of the commenting community!” – Gabe

    I’m getting a little sick and tired of this patronizing nonsense over the popularity contests here. I enjoy the blog posts and the commentators and the animated gifs and things. I share my opinions and don’t give a care one way or the other if said comments get up-voted, down-voted or punitative-ly and obsessively zero-voted or whatever. Although I admit it’s a little hypocritical of me to give a care about convincing any of you that I do not in fact give a care. I know. Life is complicated and a complex voyage.

    Let me put it to you this way: imagine I am just a cool regular guy who just wants to rock out in his band with his hot girlfriend on drums and his nerdy, safe emasculated and non-threatening back up brohams. We like to rock out IRL and jam. And here you guys show up as a digital apparition in the mirror threatening to suck me in to some digital tron matrix Flip Side void where you will make me your slave. That’s what you guys are like.

    I think THESE guys know what I’m talking about:

  18. Where’s the post about the Tonys liveblog??? Hugh Jackman is going to be there!

  19. As I write this, a rerun of The King of Queens is on TV in which the story revolves around Doug driving the Insane Clown Posse to the VH1 Music Awards.
    Happy Friday Monsters!

  20. Wow, I’m honored by the nod, Gabe!

  21. I’ve got a question for werttrew if he shows up:

    As resident Videogum Secretary/Historian/Journalist whatever, what is the highest rated post of all time? I’m not sure I’ve ever seen one as high as 209 before. But I could be wrong.

  22. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  23. ignition remix’s choice for best comment of the week:

  24. I wanted to just briefly toss out to the Videogum community that I would gladly read a blog written by Gabe that isn’t necessarily Video (or whatever it is that is generally covered here) related, but instead explores and opens up to discussion a wide range of topics social, political, otherwise. If there is one thing that keeps me coming back to this blog, it is the fine mixture of hilarity and humanity in regards to just about anything, and pardon me for getting mildly serious/concerned here but Gabe you seem to be getting considerably more cynical in tone. Not that there is anything to be particularly super happy about in the world right now, but your voice seems a little trapped by the context of maintaining a pop culture sentiment to this blog.

    Anyways, whatever. It’s always great to see a glimmer of hope and positivity when you speak pleasantly of the talents of a young kid making his own old spice commercial in the bathroom. And if you discover anything really cool or interesting or if there is any sort of charity/program/benefit/whatever that you’re really digging and would like us to consider supporting, by all means throw it up on the blog.*

    *also it appears as if I’m making blog rules. I understand that this is also a job for you (yes? no?) and there are overlords with blog rules, etc. but ya know just a thought I had after a week of reading about some really dismal and upsetting shit.

  25. Hmm…so, I was kind of on vacation…what’s the tl;dr version of this week? Like, Videogum in 200 words or less? anyone?

    Also: Have fun at the Chicago Monster Party those who can make it! ♥

    • We solved the oil spill crisis, but no one would listen to a group of scrappy kids; we all agreed that Nazis and Confederate flags were not cool; and we watched Jim Carrey make love to another man.

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