NSFW music video for Chris Brown’s song “No Bullshit,” you guys:

“Hey, Chris, in the past year and a half your career has basically imploded after you beat up your famous girlfriend in a parked Ferrari after the Grammy Awards and then fled into the night. Since then, you’ve made a series of gaffes, including waiting six months to issue an apology, treating your court-ordered community service as a joke, and then delivering a laughable mea culpa on Larry King in which you claimed to take responsibility and then proceeded to dodge responsibility through the entire interview. So here is what I’m thinking, dude. For your new video, let’s have you dressed as a cat burglar and singing about condoms, intercut with graphic images of you having sex with a woman who is not Rihanna. People definitely want the brooding, sexy, dangerous, borderline-violent, possibly criminal Chris Brown back. Even more importantly, they definitely want to see that YOU have MOVED ON, because what is important in all of this is that you are GETTING LAID. This is just going to be awesome and definitely restart your whole career for sure, no doubt.”

–Someone who has no idea what they are talking about, advising Chris Brown on this video (Via Idolator.)

Comments (41)
  1. Much more tasteful then Roman Polanski’s new kid’s show: Fun-Fun.

  2. Rihanna’s pretty.

  3. WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG. Gabe, you’re wrong.

    It was BEFORE the Grammy’s.

  4. Dear Chris Brown
    You seem to think You are Usher but you are not Usher. Stop trying to be Usher. Did I say Usher enough?
    Love America

  5. In Chris Brown’s defense, people seemed to like him as the dinner entertainment for Duh Aficionado Magazine’s 12th Annual Marketing and Sales Meeting at the Lynchburg Best Western.

    He was almost as popular as the raffle for the 24″ flat screen television and Western Sizzler gift cards.

  6. I love it when R&B singers put up a huge front about their sexual prowess.

    “Gonna make you cum over and over again.”

    No you won’t, Chris Brown. You’ll blow your load in 45 seconds and punch me in the face when I can’t stop laughing.

  7. mydaughter'sname69  |   Posted on May 25th, 2010 +32

    Maybe one day I can forgive Chris Brown for punching his famous girlfriend in the face, because who among us hasn’t done that at the Grammy’s? I know Tila Tequila has forgiven him, which is the first step. But I don’t think I can forgive the line “Reach up in the dresser where them condoms is” because that’s just bad grammar. Even worse, you just rhymed “is” with “is.” You’re dead to me, Chris Brown!

    • I’m just happy there is a mainstream pop song that might indoctrinate kids into using condoms! Freal.

      “I’m gonna use a condom because Chris Brown uses condoms and he is a cool [violent, terrible, icky] person.”

  8. dear chris brown,
    i already get my slightly porny r&b smooth jams from usher.
    signed,
    the women of america.

  9. I know this girl who says she’d totally marry chris brown because he’s pretty and something something and he didn’t really MEAN to hit rhianna. This is the same girl that asked, seriously, if planes can land on clouds and thought that Australia was part of Canada.

    …And that is my story.

  10. My main problem with this song is that Chris Brown already did this

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhI9qGuNsJA

    song a few months ago, and the melody is virtually the same except they changed the instrument presets from “hip-hop club banger” to “R&B slow jam.”

    and it’s an entirely different producer which is even more confusing.

  11. Women will still have sex with him?

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

    GREAT joke Chris Brown. VERY EXCELLENT.

  12. Chris Brown is great at not being great. Why can’t you let him not be great, ya’ll?

  13. Shoddy reporting. I believe it was a Lamborghini

  14. oh snap … Marie beat me to it

  15. “For your new video, let’s have you dressed as a cat burglar and singing about condoms, intercut with graphic images of you having sex with a woman who is not Rihanna. ”

    You say this as if it would be better for his career if the woman in the video was Rihanna.

  16. Such an asshole…and yet, nominated for a BET Award for best male R&B artist. No bullshit.

  17. I’m surprised no one has mentioned this girl’s crazy nails. If TLC taught me anything, you need to be CrazySexyCool, not MetallicPainfulWeird
    http://tinypic.com/r/oej4m/6

  18. I only beat up my girlfriends in Maseratis.

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