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Oh good. It has been awhile since we have had a party game. What has everyone even been doing at parties lately? Who knows. “Want to talk about current events, or things that are happening in your life?” “No.” That is just an example of things that have almost certainly be said at your more recent parties. The newest one is just a straight-forward classic. #calmmovielines. You get it. But here are some examples:
- “I am not sure whether or not you can handle the truth, but I hope so.”
- “My name is Inigo Montaya. You killed my father. I have been very upset about that, you don’t even know.”
- “Are you talking to me? Are you talking to me? Who are you talking to? Is it me? Hi!”
- “So, just stay alive, OK, and I will find you. I’m not sure how long it’s going to take depending on how far you go, but I’ll find you, don’t even worry about it.”
- “Yeah, this is Sparta.”
Whoops, hold on. CAR! Hold on. OK. GAME ON!
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I am standing at the front of a ship.
Hey, guys, when you get a chance, there’s an iceberg ahead.
I’m about to let go.
Stella. I guess.
Stella?
Is there, um, perhaps, some money that you could show me?
The moment at which you greeted me was when I realized I would enjoy becoming romantically entangled with you.
Would you mind if we stopped using wire hangers, please?
you win.
#canadianmovielines
The snakes on this plane are growing tiresome.
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What do you mean?
That is almost verbatim what I wrote on Twitter. Maybe this is more Great Minds than plagiarism. I trust you Mr. Sauce!
I haven’t been on Twtter. I think we are just soul mates. Don’t tell Kenny.
there’s an anaconda snake on this boeing 757 plane.
I find Heineken distasteful and vastly prefer Pabst Blue Ribbon.
I will passionately make love to anything that is moving in a calm manner.
Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a darn.
Frankly, my dear, eh….. *shrugs*
Politely, madam, I am not emotionally invested.
Hey Lebowski I know you owe us some money but we’re reasonable men and I’m sure we can work out a deal
Donny, my interest in you wanes.
Do you see what happens when you cause a stranger distress, Larry?
I’m not crazy about this aggression, but whatever, i guess.
Donnie, THANKS FOR YOU INPUT!!!
You’re gently tearing me apart, Lisa.
To be honest, this world is kinda starting to bother me.
i did naht hit her. this is truly upsetting. i did naht hit her, i did naht.
If you could, kindly place your comment in your pocket.
Hey, i was just wondering if you understand life? Yeah, anyway i was just wondering. Thanks!
I sometimes wish that my life was my own. Instead of, y’know, yours. Thanks for understanding, Dad. Good talk.
I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. I have plenty of bubblegum, so it may take me a while to get to that second part. Sorry if I startled you.
–Reasonable Roddy Piper from the movie “They Live and I’m OK With That.”
We will be well-advised to acquire a larger boat.
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I stole nothing. It’s parallel thinking. Like Dane Cook’s entire career.
You seem to be upset.
#calmcamronlines
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i bet if you changed your icon, nobody would. it is all about the icon recognition. but then again, i like that icon. decisions!
Kenny seems to like it. It stays. Maybe i will make a conscious effort to be less of a perpetual e-asshole. Then again Kenny seems to like that too….
I think you mean e-b-hole. But Kenny seems to like that too.
“If one were to ask who enjoyed orange soda, I would have to say that I, Kel, enjoy orange soda. I really do.” #calmkenanandkellines
kel thinks orange soda is alright
I’m going to make him an offer that will be fairly hard to say no to.
I would enjoy a sip of your milkshake.
I’m going to put my straw in your milkshake, if that’s OK with you. Then hit you in the head with a bowling pin. Or not, who knows. We’ll see where the moment takes us.
I’m on the bow of this boat with my arms out.
I’m going to tell everybody that walks in this building that in 2R, Janice Rossi, is a fairly promiscuous woman
Soylent Green might not be as nutritious as you think.
They can take our lives, but they will not be allowed to take our right to petition the king about papal land grants.
(I want to upvote this for days.)
Fuuck this made me do an expensive wine spit-take.
It appears that this planet was Earth the whole time.
I think I got a peek into what it is that makes Soylent Green so delicious. You’d never guess!
Excuse me, could you please get off of my plane?
Excuse me, could you please get off my lawn?
Hey, would you mind telling where my family has gone? I’d greatly appreciate it.
Dan, please pay attention to me?
YOU SHALL NOT PASS! UNLESS YOU JUST CAN’T FIND ANOTHER WAY! YOU KNOW WHAT, JUST GO AHEAD! SORRY TO SHOUT, BUT IT’S VERY LOUD IN HERE!
yup
Bowman. Steven Bowman.
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“Please introduce yourself to my diminutive friend. I hope you don’t find his small stature off-putting, he’s really quite nice.”
There. Now we are all having fun!
Mom, check it out. Top of the world over here.
I feel the need- the need to go mildly faster than usual!
Perhaps this is Sparta.
I gave her my heart and she gave me one of those fancy Mont Blanc pens for my birthday, isn’t she great?
Fight and you will die. Run and you will live, at least awhile.
I can’t imagine how they managed to overtake Air Force One.
This has nothing to do with the game but, Taxi Driver is such a great movie. Combining it with ice cream cones sounds like a formula for enjoyment.
The best best best movie. And that is a fantastic idea, hlebtastic. Guess what I’m doing this weekend.
Khan.
Khaaaaaan?
please give me the keys, you silly goose ice road trucker
Are you aware of what happens, Larry? When you attempt to make love to someone with whom you aren’t familiar? Are you aware of it at all, Larry?
Always. Be. Calmly and fairly negotiating a deal with our valuable customers.
put the coffee down. the coffee is for people who occasionally cold call but don’t really set any sales appointments.
I believe you should probably stop asking questions. That’s my name.
You drove a Hyundai to work today, which I’m sure is a great value and I understand they get good mileage. I’ve got a BMW myself, but, you know, different strokes.
Just a suggestion, but maybe now would be a good time to go to lunch? Would you please, like, if you want, go to lunch, or not?
We would really prefer to not wear badges, if it’s all the same to you.
Let the Kraken go, I guess.
You know, I’m not super comfortable with where Baby is currently sitting.
Hello, ma’am. Would be so kind as to let me know how this doll here became charred?
Please place some distance between you and the velocipede.
I hate to be a bother, but if it’s not too much to ask, I’d prefer you didn’t pour bees on me. I’m terribly allergic, you see, and it could result in a terribly unpleasant rash if I am stung.
Huh, the story is this notebook is pretty similar to our lives. Time for you pills!
Huh, the story in this notebook is pretty similar to our lives. Time for your pills!
I don’t care if this was a mistake or not, I am going to assume that it is a Alzheimer joke.
Baby Alzheimer’s is the deadliest kind…
King Kong does not have much on me – except for the fur and the enormous size – in which case he has me beat. Go King Kong!
Please don’t mention Fight Club to other people if you would.
rule #2: no really, please? it’d be really helpful if you kept fight club on the dl.
Yippe Kay Yay, new casual acquaintance.
Get your odored paws off me, you darn less-hygienic ape!
Listen: Once I say so, give them all sorts of hell, okay?
Can you please explain to me the reason why this doll was burned.
I feel the need to accentuate my upvote with a hearty LOL.
You’re mildly annoying me, Smalls.
Attica. Um….Attica?
These bees are getting pretty close to my eyes you guys.
When you put your hand into a bunch of goo that … You know what, I don’t like where I’m going with this. I mean, ick, right? Let’s just get out there and do the best we can, okay fellas?
what we have here is…a…failure to communicate?
The Shin might change your day.
But being as this is a .44 Magnum, a very big gun, and could hurt you, you’ve got to ask yourself one question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do you, sir?
Badges? We have no need of badges, good sir.
I don’t think that’s a moon. It’s probably a space station, but I guess we’ll see.
Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Because I can try again. Tell you what, I’ll just keep going until you’re entertained. Just raise your hand when you’re entertained, so I know. Thanks!
Have you ever heard the noise that a pig makes? I’d like you to do that while I’m sodomizing you…
I suppose they could pass gently in their sleep and perhaps not go to heaven, I guess.
It’s fine, we don’t need an apology and you can go ahead and take your trophy. You’ve earned it.
Is this from “Bad News Bears”? I hope so! upvote!
I guess this game seems to be about over, man. Game seems pretty much over!
If you don’t mind, I would like for all of us to get up. Yes, let’s get up out of chairs. Very good. Now, let’s go to the window, and if it isn’t already open, please open it at this time. Excellent. Alright, next, let’s all of us stick our heads out the window, yes like that very nice, and together voice our dissatisfaction with the present state of affairs. Wonderful!
I want you to find this nancy-boy Eliot Ness, I want his credit rating ruined, I want his family woken up by a barking dog, I want his house to have a lamplight pointing into his bedroom. I want to go there in the middle of the night and quietly smile to myself about all the ways I’ve inconvenienced him.
Mitch and/or Murray, for your LOTR entry up the page a scroll or two and this bit of brilliance, you win in my heart, or at least find yourself tied with Pepper Ann’s wire hangers in my heart. One or the other. I haven’t quite decided.
and by LOTR I meant Braveheart. The LOTR one is in third place in my heart. Sorry huckabeast for the confusion. I still love you. A platonic sort of love. Not like Kenny’s for Carrie (KENNY AND CARRIE 4 LYFE).
I really appreciate you saying that. Thank you.
We don’t need roads because we’ll be traveling temporally rather than spatially.
One Billion, one hundred and twenty-one million watts is quite a few watts. Golly.
Dammit. every nerd knows it’s one billion, two hundred ten million watts. Physics FAIL.
I haven’t been nodded at like that since graduate school.
If it’s not too much of a bother, would you mind letting my people go?
Welcome to the Thunderdome. Most competitors wait in line over here, but if you want some water, or something, the lobby is out and to the left.
San Dimas High School Football is a worthy competitor
The life of the mind is significantly more chaotic and violent than I think you suspected. Allow me to demonstrate.
Tame the cock. Respect the lady-parts.
If you don’t mind, I have some questions for you. If you don’t tell me the truth, I may be a little miffed, but we can work it out nicely. -Jason Bourne
Luke, look this is complicated… When I was 9 I fell for this chick who was older than me, like creepy older, but it was cool I guess, anyway I aged faster than she did and I ended up forming a bit of a relationship with her. We fell in love and got married and then I fell in with a bad crowd and she didn’t want much to do with me. Long story short, I need a kidney.
Dammit Notsewfast, I keep thinking I came up with one, double check to make sure it’s not here and you beat me to it. And they’re always better than mine to begin with. Grumble
Pssst…Elaine.
I’m not sure what you mean when you say I’m funny?…Is it my inflection or the substance of the words? I’ve always been fascinated by the mechanics of comedy, so this could be a learning moment for me.
That’s still scary to me.
Could you please step away from her, ma’am?
“What’s that smell?”
“It’s gas.”
Wait….that’s the actual quote. I’m terrible at this. Just like Keanu Reeves is a terrible actor.
Nobody’s seen Speed huh? I’ll show myself out.
What’s my name? Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Blake.
Bumblebee.
Tonight we dine in heck.
Tonight we dine at Applebees.
I’m not sure if they deserve to die, and am ambivalent about their fate in the afterlife.
repost from my Twitter: “Don’t worry about it, Jake, it’s just Chinatown.”
Hey Danny? Wendy? Can you guys let me in? I’d like to come in and murder you, but this axe isn’t ideally suited for opening doors.
Peek-a-boo! It’s me, Johnny!
Oh hey you guys Johnny is here.
“I have strong feelings towards you.” -romantic movies.
I am slightly upset. Would you mind if I don’t necessarily take this anymore?
Stay gold Ponyboy… if you want. i don’t really want to inconvenience you but gold is a good way to be and and if you stayed gold my death would be that much easier to take…
“Rose, bud.”
OR, and stay with me here: “Sled.”
Um, SPOILER ALERT, please!
Can you repeat that in a calmer way please?
You think that’s a knife? Me too. This is also a knife. /Aussie accent
The reality of this situation is starting to dawn on me.
another repost from my account on micro-blogging website Twitter dot com:
“If you could just put the lotion in the basket that would be awesome, thanks so much.”
You know what I just realized guys? This is totally a trap. Boom. Nailed it.
It’s an upvote!
Upvote to the max
damnit, once again, should have read all the comments. sorry for accidentally stealing this.
I’ll have what she’s having… but with a little less orgasm and can we get a refill on these waters please?
prequel to that line: “mmm yes. mmm.”
English, my friend, are you fluent in it?
Awww, I should learn to read comments first, THEN post!
It’s not such a good idea for one to just, you know, walk into Mordor. Be safe!
General Zod, if you have the time, could you please step outside…and watch your step. Thanks.
Hey flight director in Houston, there may be a slight issue up here…don’t panic though, we’ll probably figure it out.
see, i think that line was delivered fairly calmly in the movie…some of these are just coming off as passive aggressive.
-♥-
I think you’re underestimating the nuanced performance of Mr. Hanx, as he bravely conveys the restrained panic of Captain Jim Lovell, faced with the possibility of NEVER SEEING HIS HOME AGAIN.
I think i’m just jealous because I’m not good at this game:
“Sometimes the people that I see aren’t always alive people. Sometimes they are dead.”
Please put this lotion on. I don’t like using the hose anymore than you like getting sprayed. It’s called compromise!
now if you would, please place the lotion back in the basket.
“would you make love to me? I would make love to me. I would make love to me so nice”
Pardon me, but do you know how this doll became charred?
i’m pretty upset and after the next round of layoffs i’ll probably not be willing to take it anymore.
Welcome to Earth. I hope you enjoy your visit with us.
all the upvotes are yours