A Sawyer episode! Oh thank goodness. Who doesn’t love a good Sawyer episode? Last night was the first time this season that this show actually make me smile. Then again, last night’s episode also had the first cliff-hanger of the season to actually make me groan out loud. It sounded something like this: unhhhhhhhhhhhh. Anyway, Sawyer is in Claire’s studio garbage dump? I guess they ran out of tea in the Dharma camp, and you know how much Sawyer likes tea. He goes inside the garbage tent to find Jin who is sleeping off his bear trap wounds and he wakes Jin up just to tell him that he is Team Locke now. Uh, you could have let him sleep, Sawyer. But Sawyer is just very excited to be on Team Locke, and it’s nice to see him so excited about something after being such a gloomy gus these past few weeks. Jin is like “I can’t leave the island, Sun might be out there,” and Sawyer is like, “you have my word that we won’t leave the island without Sun.” Uh, first of all, no one on Team Locke is leaving the island no duh no doy. Second of all, Sawyer, it’s one thing to join up with the reincarnated body of a man you know to be dead, who also happens to be a fucking SMOKE MONSTER, we could all use a shoulder to lean on or whatever, but maybe you should relax with pretending like you hold all the cards and make all the rules. Let me put it this way: one of you has been trapped on the island for centuries, trying desperately to escape, can shapeshift and is some kind of dark-facet of the moral compass, and the other one is really good at homestyle nicknaming. And there is only one pair of pants in this family!

Oh, here comes the rest of the gang!

Hi, Sayid! Hi, Claire! Hi, Locke! Hi, Kate! I’m sure that after spending so many years in a majestic temple filled with magic whirlpools and secret passageways that everyone is pretty excited to be in a garbage dump in the middle of the jungle filled with bone babies. Speaking of, HI BONE BABY!

Kate is like, “Hey, Claire, no big deal, but, like, what’s up with the Bone Baby?” And Claire is like, “It’s all I had.” Yikes. Anyway, Locke reassures some crying children that even though he knows that it’s scary that everyone in the temple who they knew and loved had to get murdered, it’s over. Oh, it’s over? OK, cool. Thanks, Locke! Meanwhile, Claire holds Kate’s hand and Kate is like, uhhhh. Seriously, who knows where those hands have been. You know what they say, the hair is the window to the hands. “Move out!” Yes, sir, Mr. Locke. Right away, sir.

Out in the jungle, Sawyer gets mad at Locke because he wants to go home nowwwwwww and Locke promissssssssed. Haha, sure, Sawyer. Everyone knows that the way to prove your dominance as the Alpha Male is to whine a lot and be confused about what is going on. Locke pulls him aside and is like “I want you to take this boat and go to the other island and see what’s up.” I mean, he gives him some reasons? Like, that Sawyer is good at lying? But mostly he is just like, “Do it,” and Sawyer is like, “Oh fine.” WHAT? What is up with everyone on this show doing anything anyone asks them immediately no questions ever asked. “I will definitely go on this boat alone to another island entirely and do whatever it is that you want me to do over there, because a couple weeks ago you showed me two colored rocks on a scale in a cave, and now you’re the boss. But also I’m the boss and don’t you ever forget that, boss.” Basically.

The other island sure brings up a lot of old memories.

Hahah. Remember that sample sale?

Sawyer finds the plane that is going to get them off the island! He gives it a quick once over, and determines that it is definitely an airplane. Definitely.

Then he finds a pile of dead bodies. PEE-YEW! Yucky! Then he finds a smaller pile of live body. Her name is Zoe. She is the only survivor. OK. She spent days dragging all the other bodies into a pile in the shade. Uhhh. One day she was separate from the rest of the group and she heard screams and then everyone was dead. Sawyer is just like, yup, this is one silly island. Sawyer tells her that he is with a couple dozen people on the main island, and they head over to the boat. But then Sawyer is like, “Where were you going when the plane crashed?” And Zoe is like, “Guam.” And he is like, “What’s in Guam?” And she is like, “My boyfriend.” And Sawyer is like, “GUN IN YOUR FACE.”

I like that we have learned over the years that Sawyer is such a good con man and lie artist that we are just supposed to believe that this was a game of cat and mouse between two experts, but Zoe played the wrong card. “I was going to Guam to see my boyfriend” is a classic Two Nuns In A Cornfield Gambit, any halfwit three card monte huckster could smoke it out in his shuteye. And other colloquialisms!

So Zoe (IF THAT IS EVEN HER REAL NAME) leads Sawyer to a submarine.

Man, this show loves submarines so much. It wants to marry submarines and have little baby submarines. On the way to the submarine, Sawyer sees people putting up anti-smoke-monster pylons. Very smart, guys. That is just the type of thing I would mean to bring but then forget at the last minute. Forgotten socks and anti-smoke-monster pylons have ruined more than one vacation. Anyway, they take Sawyer into the submarine and he immediately sees a door with padlocks on it. “What are these for, shake shake shake,” he says. “Huh? You got locks in here, shake shake shake.” Hahahha. Sawyer to locks is like a baby to a jangly set of shiny keys. Whatever, Sawyer. As if he is just such a professional submarine aficionado that he recognizes an out-of-place lock when he sees one. Anyway, they lead him to the captain’s quarters, and there is Charles Widmore, doing his homework.

MATH IS HARD.

Meanwhile, back on the main island, Claire stops holding Kate’s hand long enough to try and stab Kate in the throat. Get her, Claire!

But Locke puts a stop to this madness, domestic abuse style.

Kate is all like:

I am all like:

Kate is really freaked out. So Locke takes her for a seaside smoke-monster-to-heart chat. He explains that he filled Claire with hate to give her something to hold onto. Fair enough, but if she was holding onto all that hate, then who was holding onto the BONE BABY? Then he goes into some story about how he had a crazy mom? And Kate is like, uh, what? And I am like, uh, what? And then he’s like, “I told you about how I had a crazy mom because now Baby Aaron has a crazy mom.” Good story! “I really enjoyed this conversation,” Kate doesn’t say. Looking good as always, Kate!

So Sawyer makes a deal with Charles Widmore that he is going to lead Locke right to the submarine where Charles Widmore can kill him, and his only rule is that he wants everyone in his boat to be spared and allowed to go home. Charles Widmore asks how he can trust Sawyer, and Sawyer says the same way the he can trust Charles Widmore. I guess. Although one of you has been arrested for Professional Lying. But I guess the other one broke “the truce,” so. Except Charles Widmore can’t trust Sawyer at all, because as soon as Sawyer paddles back (paddle paddle paddle) to the main island, he tells Locke everything, and now Locke is going to be the one surprise attacking Charles Widmore. Oh no! Except, I’m pretty sure that Charles Widmore didn’t get to be the owner of his own private submarine by immediately putting all his faith into handshake deals with grown men who call complete strangers “Freckles.”

That night, at the campfire, Sawyer reveals to Kate that he is actually playing BOTH SIDES. Classic long con. He is going to let Locke and Charles Widmore kill each other, and then he and Kate are going to escape the island once and for all. “Oh, Sawyer, even if we could get on that plane, who would fly it?” Kate asks. “We ain’t taking the plane, Cinnabon, we’re taking the sub.” And then dramatic music fades in. HAHAHHA, THE SUB?! WHUUUUUUUUUUUT? Probably the funniest ending of an episode ever. “We’re not taking the plane, Pinkberry, we’re taking the sub.” I wonder how many takes they had to do for Sawyer’s delivery to be INTENSE enough.

Oh, but wait!

We are not at the end of the episode at all. ALLEY-OOP, it’s back to Bizarro Los Angeles, where Sawyer has just finished doing it with some lady in a hotel. Classic Sawyer. So classic. But uh oh, he is late for his important meeting! And uh oh, his briefcase full of cash fell open. She wasn’t supposed to see that! Except of course she was supposed to see that. He’s Sawyer! It’s a con job! But now the con man has met his match, because she pulls a gun on him. But Sawyer double-indemnities her (I’m sure that reference is appropriate and used correctly) when he explains that he is a cop, and her husband is a con artist, and he is just using her to get to her husband, and she better put the gun down or else this room is going to be swarming with a SWAT team. Obviously, this is just fast-thinking slick-talk from a lie magician. OR IS IT. Sawyer says the safe word, “LaFleur,” and the door busts down. SAWYER IS A COP.

WHUUUUUUUUUT?! And check out his partner:

WHUUUUUUUUUT?! And just in case you still don’t believe me, look:

Sawyer is DEFINITELY a cop now. Anyway, the next day, he is making some secretive phone calls. Huh, I wonder what that’s all about. AND SO DOES HIS PARTNER, MILES. “You can tell me anything,” Miles says. “We’re partners.” Relax, Miles. I mean, sure, but also relax. You guys aren’t actually married, yet. (Although they will be married soon. In the multi-verse Bizarro LA, all cops eventually marry each other, and the World Trade Center is still standing.) Well, Miles says, I guess we will just have to leave the mystery of who you are talking to on the phone for another time, because right now I want to set you up on a date with my friend, because you haven’t gotten laid since last night when we were on a case. (Incidentally, you would be surprised how often cops have sex on the job in Bizarro LA. Needless to say, it’s a ton.) So Sawyer reluctantly agrees to go on a date. Look who he goes on a date with.

WHUUUUUUUUUT?!

Naturally, they immediately go back to Sawyer’s place and do it. Because in Bizarro LA, Charlotte is no longer a reserved scientist, she is just a cold-blood Bang Hound. After doing it so much, she asks Sawyer if she can borrow a t-shirt, and he is like, definitely, I keep my t-shirts in the top-right drawer of the dresser, right next to the DRAWER OF SECRETS. She does what any young lady would do. She gently touches his copy of Watership Down, and then she rifles through his jeans drawer like she’s trying to rob him. Seriously, did anyone notice how FRANTICALLY Charlotte was going through that drawer? Maybe in Bizarro LA, t-shirts are microscopic and very hard to see with the human eye. Because otherwise, it’s pretty easy to tell whether there are t-shirts in a drawer or not. Anyway, she stumbles on James Ford’s secret “Sawyer” file, which he keeps in the loosely packed top drawer of his clothes dresser, because he is a PRO. She’s casually rifling through it, because this is a first date, and she’s an asshole. James is not happy when he comes back from wherever he was, having finished whatever he was doing.

He kicks her out. I guess he is a little aggressive about it, but Charlotte seems way too surprised that snooping through someone’s personal business just hours after meeting them would be seen as anything less than charming. The next night, Sawyer realizes that maybe he acted too harshly, and goes to her door to make amends.

Oh great. Another mystery. How does he know where she lives? They went on one blind date! “Let’s skip the small talk and exchange addresses.” She says it is too late. Really? Again, I understand that people don’t like getting screamed at right after banging. But people also don’t like to discover someone snooping on them right after banging. I think this could just be considered an even stevens. But it’s not. Charlotte is like, get out of here, and take your sunflower and six pack of Dharma Ale with you. Oh well. Better luck next time, Bizarro James Ford. You should call up Bizarro Naomi, see if she is still hot.

Back at the precinct, Detective Miles grabs Detective James Ford (show some respect) and throws him up against the cop lockers. He pulled up Sawyer’s credit card receipts and knows that he went to Australia instead of Palm Springs like he said. Uhhh, yikes, Detective Miles. You seriously should take up scrap-booking or something. Because you are wayyyy too deep up Detective Ford’s butt. He says that they are not partners anymore, because real partners wouldn’t lie about private vacations to deal with personal business. And then Miles excuses himself to GO TO THERAPY. But I guess Miles’s weird, obsessive, boundaries-less freak out strikes a chord with Sawyer, because he finally reveals the secret “Sawyer” file to him, and explains that if and when he ever finds the man responsible for the death of his parents, he is going to kill him.

The only reason he didn’t tell him before was because he knew Miles would try and talk him out of it. Huh. I would have thought that the only reason you didn’t tell him before was because since you are both police officers, I’m pretty sure Miles is bound by law to report you to his superiors for declaring your pre-meditated plans to murder someone in cold blood. But I guess it was just because you hate people trying to talk you out of murder when murder is what you really want. So annoying, right?! No time to think too hard about it, though, because CAR CRASH. Someone is on the run! Oh, it’s just Kate. Looking good Kate.

You don’t have to be a multi-verse bizarro cop to know that Kate should go to jail.

Comments (116)
  1. It’s been an alright week; Spring weather plus a Sawyer episode had me feeling pretty good. These guys know what I’m talking about:

    Richard episode next week!

  2. At first I was like, “Sawyer, navigating a sub is probably just as hard as flying a plane”. Then I remembered that Submarine Navigation is a requirement at Conman University and I was like, DUH! Silly me!

  3. The Tina Fey cameo really caught me by surprise.

  4. I’ve been on board for all the suspension of disbelief until Sawyer tried to convince me that piloting a submarine would be easier than flying a plane. I’m out.

    • Hey now, they could always hijack the submarine.
      That or Sawyer took submarine lessons back when he spent 3 years in the DHARMA Initiative.
      That or he played with a lot of toy subs in the tub when he as growing up parentless.
      That or 5, 5 dollar, 5 dollar footlong at subway.

      • Any Any ANY

      • Sawyers logic: All you have to do is hit the big red SUBMERGE button, then kick your captain seat back and relax. Subs basically navigate themselves.

      • I think it’s humorous to point out that here in Alaska, the 5 dollar Subway commercials are replaced with cheesy local versions that sing a similar song about how every foot long sub is “6 dollar, 6 dollar any any…”.

        Which is pretty much the definition to adding insult to injury.

        • That’s the worst, when I lived there the McDonalds Dollar Menu was the $1.59 menu. You definitely can’t rhyme ‘holla’ with that.

    • That’s the part that lost you? Not the smoke monster, shape shifting, inability to die, etc etc etc. Sawyer on a sub?

    • …I’m back on board! You guys should be lawyers.

    • An honestly, if I am going to die on account of someone not knowing how to operate a vehicle, I would rather fall from the sky and die quickly than sink slowly to the bottom of the ocean and sit entombed in a submarine, in the dark, surrounded by the icy vast ocean. And Kate.

  5. Why does everyone keep making fun of me?

  6. I really don’t understand why Claire’s hair is a mess while Sawyer has his on lockdown. He must have a suitcase somewhere on the island full of Tresemme products and Stooges records.

  7. What makes me groan is that in practically every episode of the season, characters have the chance to, or hint at, or try to kill Kate. AND IT NEVER HAPPENS! The writers totally know we all hate her and are just fucking with our heads at this point.

  8. Am I the only one who was hoping it was a ginger Juliet sitting at the bar? She must come back! I’d rather have Sawyer die than end up with Kate.

    • There is no doubt in my mind that at some point in the Law & Sawyer (or is it Sawyer & Order? I can never remember) altern-iverse timeline Juliet will come back.

    • I couldn’t agree more. I can’t wait to see in what coincidental, wacky way they bring her back.

  9. What about the anticipation for next week, you guys?

    Richard Alpert’s episode is finally upon us!

  10. I just loved how Claire didn’t pull out the knife until AFTER she tackled Kate..

  11. Is “Applesauce” supposed to be a nickname for Kate?
    Because if so, what a wealth of great unused nicknames!
    Pinkberry, Applesauce and Cinnabon. lol

  12. “Whoa.” – Sawyer, LOST

    “WHOA!” – Det. James Ford, LOST

  13. Did anyone notice that Locke Monster’s man-boobs managed to mysteriously grow and shrink throughout the episode? Is that a clue?

  14. Unused portion of this episode’s script:

    Locke: “I want you to take this boat and go to the other island and see what’s up.”
    Sawyer: “Why should I, ‘Locke’?'”
    Locke: “What’s wet and tastes like white paint?”
    Sawyer: “You and your damn riddles!”
    Locke: “C’mon, James. What’s wet and tastes like white paint?”
    Sawyer: “I don’t know, alright?!”
    Locke: “Black paint. 42. Now get in that boat. 16.”
    Sawyer: “One of these days, Locke. I’ma getcha.”

  15. Also, Sawyer in any reality is a conman. Even in Aerosmith world he’s stealing Alicia Silverstone’s backpack.

  16. If there is one thing that has stayed true, despite different realities, time lines, and bizarro worlds, it is this: Sawyer will hit that.

  17. Remember back in the series pilot when Jack randomly tells Kate that he knows how to fly a plane? I wonder if he’ll end up flying everyone off the island.

    • I’m tempted to think you’re teasing us, because I don’t remember back that far. Did Jack really say that? I am fighting the urge to find out. Grr.

      • Go ahead and check! It’s toward the beginning of the premiere, when Kate is stitching Jack up, he tells her (out of nowhere) that he has taken flying lessons. I’m one of those unfortunate nerds who has watched every episode of the series at least five times.

  18. Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see

  19. In defense of Charlotte’s scientific expertise despite her “banghound” nature in any or all of the realities, Miles did say she works with his DAD(!!!) at the museum. And she died in the regular reality before we got to see her banghound abilities in action on poor Faraday.

    So that’s something.

    Also, I just patented my bloodplugs in case she needs one for that perpetually bloody nose of hers.

  20. Yes everyone! Let us facelift bar for the approaching new year! I truely believe it’s gonna be Ed Hardys year to break free of the douchebag market.

  21. “Sawyer, your motivation is: ‘fucking.’”

    Also WHOA with the gifs, guys. I SAW it last night, I know that those things happened.

  22. Do you guys think they’ll be able to wrap up all of the mysteries by the end of the season? I’ve been watching “Lost” since the beginning so I’m familiar with how they’re constantly asking new questions and bringing up mysteries and never, ever resolving them, but I have faith in Lindelof/Cuse that they’ll at least get around to tying up most of the loose ends. Maybe that’s just wishful thinking on my part, but Richard’s getting a whole episode next week, so that’s a promising sign.

    I have a recurring nightmare that the last scene of the series is of Hurley shaking a snoglobe with the Island inside.

    • Oh, they will definitely answer every question. It will go something like this:

      “Who built the statue?”
      “Egyptians!”
      “When?”
      “108BC” (get it?)
      “How many were there?”
      “42″ (GET IT?!)
      “Who was their leader?”
      “Des & Penny’s baby Charlie, through the magic of time travel!”
      “Where did they go?”
      “To outer space!”

      There, that mystery is totally taken care of. Next!

    • My prediction is that there’ll be An Answer given. It’ll seem to answer most everything. It will not, however, be really satisfying and it’ll leave a lot of plot points and characters unexplained. An Answer will kinda make sense but then again it’ll kinda not make sense, and it’ll make whole seasons seem kinda pointless.

      That’s my guess.

    • http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/01/AR2010030103497.html?hpid=news-col-blog

      They aren’t wrapping up the mysteries! We’ll almost certainly never learn why Walt could kill that bird or summon the polar bear! It’s just “characters don’t care about!” WAAAAAAAAH

  23. Sawyer’s impressive sexual prowess is my constant.

  24. I found the part where ‘Locke’ talked about his mother to very moving. I’m sorry, I know, but I did. Gee whiz, Terry O’Quinn could probably make my cry playing a lightpost.

    Something though about how he carefully picked his words tells me that by ‘mother’ he really means ‘Cthulhu.’

  25. I loved the beginning of this episode, but I thought it was a little lame that Sawyer’s (er, Det. James Ford’s) personal revelation seemed to be brought on by watching an episode of LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE. I mean, don’t get me wrong, Michael Landon is totally moving, but really, writers?

    • I disagree. Remember when he read “Are You There God? It’s Me, Margret?” That’s just how Sawyer rolls. It pretty much makes him my wife’s dream man.

  26. I just can’t wrap my head around Smocke’s motivation for leaving the island. He is a SMOKE MONSTER that can only take the appareance of DEAD PEOPLE. What the hell is there for him in the normal world? HE IS MADE OF SMOKE.

    Oh, and that little speech about how his mother was crazy… HE IS MADE OF PSYCHO SMOKE! What is his mother supposed to be? Ugh. And yet, I still love this show.

  27. Can the Locke/Smoke Monster not just go over to the small island and kill everyone now, like he killed everyone in the temple, before they set up the anti-smoke monster pylons? Did Sawyer not have even one question for Smoke Monster, just even a tiny one?

    That is the one thing that has always bothered me about this show. No one ever pools their answers, no one asks questions. I am okay with a billion half-assed mysteries, loads of new characters every week, nobody getting sunburned until this season and on and on. But can’t you guys get together and talk?

  28. Why is everyone on this show always in crisis?

  29. DAMN YOU J.J. Abrams! These sideways flashes are obviously the L.A. version of Fringe’s other universe. I now fully expect Agent Dunn and the Bishop men to come plowing through at any moment.

  30. If anyone is still banking on the theory that Jacob is grown-up Aaron and Smokey is grown-up Jack’s son (like I am), Locke’s story about having a crazy mother could be a big clue as to who Jack’s baby momma is.

    I’m thinking that the Aaron who becomes Jacob is the Aaron from original reality, and considering Jack’s son only exists in X reality, the battle between Jacob & Smokey is a battle over whose reality will get to continue on (considering Damon & Carlton have both said that there will only be one reality by the end of the series).

    I should probably just kill myself now.

    • Now that you mention it, Smoke Monster Locke can play a mean rendition of “Chopsticks” on the piano.

    • But doesn’t it seem like the “crazy mother” reference was a reference to the story of Jacob and Esau? Like, Esau would believe his mother was “crazy” because she convinced Jacob to steal his older brother’s birthright and helped him do it. And we know Jacob’s name but not the Smoke Monster’s, which makes me think there has to be a significance in his name. Or, I could be full of shit, I have no idea really anymore — thank you for that, Lost!

  31. I think they are on to something with this Miles/Sawyer buddy cop angle. To that end, I am currently developing a Lost spin-off based off this episode entitled “Miles 2 Sawyer.”

  32. Am I the only one who is having a super hard time watching these episodes? I couldn’t even pay attention last night, but what I saw wasn’t nearly as entertaining as the recap. This season has been slowly sucking the life out of me.

  33. 11 times. i laugh out loud ELEVEN times while reading this. good job! here’s your LOL award! etc.

  34. besides the fact that this episode was full of awesome acting start-to-finish (Locke, Sawyer, and Miles are easily the most fun to watch on this show, and this episode was full of them, and they were on point. even Charlotte kicked ass), there were so many little clues and hints. like, every scene had something interesting.

    when Sawyer is talking to Zoe, at the very beginning of the conversation, you can see in his eyes when she says something that fucks up her credibility and how he goes back and forth between believing her and calling her bullshit.

    when Sawyer tells Locke that everyone on Ajira is dead, Locke responds with “that’s terrible! what happened!” he sounds almost…sincere. and even if not, it is close.

    without even making a big deal of it, I really -am- engaged in Flocke’s character. he’s just as fascinating and conflicting as Ben was in his heyday. I’m under his spell! I think we all are, which rules.
    because it’s working on the people on the Island as well as the viewers.

    when Locke is talking to Kate he says “growing pains that could have been avoided…if things had tuned out…different.” and there is a noticeable swell in the music. turned out different. oh, like if there was an alternate universe?

    you know who had a crazy mom? farraday. farraday went back in time and became a smoke monster.

    if Locke can take the shape of dead people and assume their stories and pasts. and Miles can read the thoughts of dead people. what do you think will happen when/if Miles and Smokey ever meet? explosion!

    remember when Desmond could shift in and out of the past+present/island+real world? do you think that is related to the alt-verse?

    the TV show Sawyer was watching related on SO MANY LEVELS. talking about having faith, and taking it a day at a time, because it will all pay off in the end? ya, shut up you impatient viewers! that was the most striking to me. like I said, everything else said can apply on a million levels.

    go on hulu right now. go to when kate and locke first talk about claire. look at the smile Locke tries to force as he reaches his hand to Kate (which she doesn’t take). and while you’re at it, go to this Sawyer/Locke exhange:

    “what if someone is there who wants to do ME harm?”
    “I’m not worried about that”
    the way Sawyer says “OH YER NAHT, HUNH?” is so awesome.

    zombie sayid is so fucking intriguing it’s driving me CRAZY. God.

    when Sawyer enters with widmore, widmore stands up and tries to shake his hand. sawyer doesn’t take it. then, when Sawyer makes the deal, he stands up and extends his hand.

    “Believe me, God ain’t got nothin to do with it” Sawyer says to Zoe when he talks about Locke and the others on the main island. reminds me of him saying “Hell Yes” (Yes, Hell) to joining Locke (aka “Evil Incarnate”) in the cave.

    Pierre Chang is alive. If Ben still had something to do with the DHARMA initiative, then it follows Pierre would have too. Was Alt-Miles born on the Island?

    This is the first time they acknowledged that the flight the alt-Losties were on was “815.” Oh, and the conwoman tells Sawyer it is 8:42 blahblahblah.

    After Sawyer punches the mirror, he has a bandage on his hand for the rest of the episode. nice touch.

    the way they chose to shoot Sayid, over Claire’s shoulder, while she is trying to kill Kate. That is such a good shot set up. is that called blocking? I am not professor film. Good blocking, LOST!

    this show is on its shit.

    The past two and a half episodes have been on par with the best of this series, and I have no reason to believe it will slow down.

    Kate was cooking rabbit for dinner. Sawyer liked that. rabbit, watership down, alice in wonderland, the rabbits in the DHARMA videos for time experiments. the episode title Follow the White Rabbit blahblah.

    this episode is fucking stacked top to bottom, doggies. and yet you can just say “fuck it” and just sit back and enjoy it without thinking about any of that shit, and take it at face value. my friends who have never seen LOST have watched the past couple weeks and have been totally engaged anyway, after not giving a shit at all for ohhh five years. That is how you know Lost is on its shit.

    I am running on three hours of sleep, and instead of passing out after my last class (GOTTA PARTY, ST PADDY’S DAY BRO AND BROSISSES), I am nerding the fuck out. thx

    • wow. can i fax you a cookie? you must be tired now.

    • I believe having Claire out of focus in the foreground and partially obscuring Sayid’s lose-up shot is what is referred to as a “Dirty” Shot, meaning something is partially obscuring the focus of the shot. They do it a lot when people have conversations. The camera switches back and forth between two people, and the backs of their heads are in each others’ shots. Those are dirty shots.

      Concerning Pierre Chang- Which reality are you talking about? We know he’s alive in the Sideways Reality because Charlotte works with him at a museum, so says Detective Miles. As for the regular reality- There’s been no mention of him since the training videos, which were made well before the DHARMA Purge. If Chang died in the Purge then Ben is directly responsible for his death. If Chang is alive then where is he hiding out? There haven’t really been any clues about that.

      “Was Miles born on the island?” I quickly checked Lostpedia and it states that it is unclear whether he was born on the island or if was brought there shortly after birth (ithas been stated that pregnant women have been taken off-island to give birth before). We know Miles still lived there as a baby before The Incident. Grown-up Miles saw baby Miles and Pierre bonding in the days leading up to it, and Miles and his Mom were still evacuated with everybody else right before it (where Chang injured his arm, as seen in the training videos), and this is true in both realities. In the alt-reality, Pierre Chang now works at a museum with Charlotte and has the knowledge that his son time-traveled to the past and met him. That’s pretty intriguing.

      And considering that we’re now delving into characters who are old enough to remember the original timeline Losties in 1977— Richard is up next week, and I’m willing to bet we’ll see a Sideways Richard— it’s safe to assume that they’ll start crossing paths and mucking things up for everyone.

      Think about the list of people in the sideways world who know about the ’77 Time Traveling Losties.
      Pierre Chang – Alive.
      Richard – Willing to bet we’ll see he’s alive in next week’s episode.

      Eloise may be alive as well, and I hope she is because I really miss seeing Faraday.
      Other people who may be alive in the Sideways world are MIB and Jacob.

      So yeah, think about that! Potentially there are 5 people in the alternate world who know all about regular Kate, Hurley, Sawyer, Sayid, Jin, Miles, Faraday and Jack, and have waited 27 years to meet them again (although it’s alternate versions of them not effected by the island). That’s pretty eerie.

      I hope something comes of that…

      • *Whoops.*
        I forgot to list Juliet as a ’77 Time-Traveling Lostie too.
        I knew I forgot somebody.

      • I meant that Pierre Chang was alive in the alt universe. Are we assuming that in the alt timeline, everything that transpired in the real ’77 still happened? I don’t know if I buy that. Because Ben was given to the Others in ’77, but in the alt-verse he apparently stayed with the DHARMA initiative which is why he ended up leaving the Island with his father. I mean, it’s possible, but I don’t know.

        I miss Faraday too. I need to watch Season 5 again though. Even with all this knowledge and theorizing, honestly, if someone asked me “so, why did they set off a hydrogen bomb?” “what was the deal with desmond’s shifting realities?” “what’s a constant?” I’d just shrug.

        • Ben stayed with the DHARMA Initiative in both realities. In the alt-timeline everything that happened in ’77 that we saw in season 5 is what happened. We don’t know what happened when the bomb went off.

          Yes, at the time Ben was with the Others. He was always with the Others when The Incident happened. But in the regular reality he was healed and returned to DHARMA-Ville and then gassed and killed everyone when he grew up, working with Richard Alpert and The Others.

          In the alt-world it seems he was healed and returned to DHARMA-Ville and then everyone had to leave the island before it went underwater, and the Island’s or The Other’s sway over Ben was never realized. I think we’ll learn a whole lot more (I HOPE I HOPE I HOPE) with Richard’s episode coming up next week.

          The only gray area I feel when I think about the time traveling part of the show is this- did everything leading up until Jughead being detonated happen in BOTH timelines? And if so, what about The Incident was different from one reality to the other.

          Jack believed he would change the future by detonating a bomb because that’s what Faraday said. But what Jack did was create and alternate timeline AND create a time-traveling flash that sent everyone back to the present in the original timeline.

          I would like to know what happened in the original timeline of ’77 if Jack detonating the bomb wasn’t ALWAYS what happened (as we are led to believe that whatever happened, happened, but clearly Jughead blowing up wasn’t always what happened, or was it?).

          I’ve gone cross-eyed.

          • *uncrosses eyes*
            And by that ‘gray area’ I mentioned about what happened in ’77, I mean was that always how it happened in the regular timeline.

            The argument points to yes. Time-traveling in ’77 is always what happened for both timelines (there was that scene in the regular timeline where Christian showed Sun the picture in the DHARMA hut of everyone back in time in their DHARMA scrubs).

            So what was it about the detonation of Jughead that was different? Obviously the Island went underwater for some reason, but why is that if they always detonated Jughead in both timelines? AND if in the original timeline the difference is they never detonated Jughead (which doesn’t seem a likely scenario considering whatever happens happens), what happened to all the Losties in ’77? Were they killed in the DHARMA purge? Did Juliet and Sawyer get married and live happily for 7 or 8 years before Ben and the Others killed everyone?

            WHEW. Ok, enough questions with no answers. I just felt the need to clarify, because my last comment got me cross-eyed!

            P.S. Wouldn’t it be funny (it would not be funny) if the reason the island sank in the alt-timeline was because one of the DHARMA people ran to yet another unknown DHARMA station, went down a large elevator shaft akin to the one in the Orchid, and pulled a giant cork out of the floor, and then a bunch of water gushed in? That would be hilarious.

  35. episode title, “Through the Looking Glass.” I mean. also, I was kidding about Farraday. maybe. Farraday went back to 2004 and stole Charlie’s beard.

  36. this was a really funny writeup for what was admittedly an awesome episode

  37. I was half expecting Liz Lemon to break out in cheesy blasters song.

  38. I don’t know how to do it, so please someone make a .gif of Sawyer looking into the mirror and then punching his reflection and breaking the mirror. so funny.

  39. I hope that Faraday shows up in the alt-timeline LA and blows up ANOTHER bomb! But this time the rift in time occurs IRL, so that Gabe can treat us to the write-ups of the FIRST 5 seasons!
    He could point out all the books I missed and summarize them for me…. Please, I don’t even have time for CliffNotes!

    Just saying, I would probably understand a bit more of WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?

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