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A new Prince of Persia: Sands of Time trailer, you guys:
This might be even worse than the first trailer! Watching this trailer, I think I finally understand how people who have never seen Lost must feel when their friends talk about Lost. “See, there’s this prince and he’s got this dagger, right? But the question isn’t what is the deal with the dagger, the question is WHEN is the deal with the dagger. Because the dagger…well, at least I think the dagger…it’s a magic dagger. OK. And the dagger is in a wheelchair, well, the dagger used to be in a wheelchair, but then the dagger’s dad threw it out the window. Anyway, he’s got to get to the tower before a snake bites him, and if he gets there right at midnight then Oceanic Camel 815 will never have gotten thirsty in the desert. WE’VE GOT TO GO BACK TO THE DESERT.” “I think I get it, but here’s my only question: when does the prince SHUT UP?”
That is just a typical conversation between two normal people who definitely exist.
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Wow my Persian is coming along great. This practically sounds British to me.
British in the Kevin Costner sense?
More British in the Brad Pitt in Troy sense. Costner is (still) 1/2 American when he shots for British.
Upvote forever, or at least until people stop believing that all civilizations older than the American revolution had British accents.
I’m not sure that i understand what’s so confusing. Spider man brought a box of knives onto the Black Pearl, but then they turned the captains wheel too far and ended up in the desert, so now he has to return the treasure so they won’t be immortal anymore. And it’s in ancient times, so everybody has a British accent. Because that’s how they used to talk. Always.
I really like the tagline: “Defy the Future.” How does one defy something that hasn’t happened yet? Deep stuff, Prince of Persia, deep stuff.
Because I don’t feel like watching this trailer, this is as good a time as any to announce that comments are all on single pages now!!!
I’m having a party for this right now.
PEOPLE keep SAYING THIS IS going to be THE FIRST VIDEOGAME movie that IS GOOD, BUT HAVE WE already fuckin FORGOTTEN about FAR Cry? Onechanbara: THE MOVIE? BloodRayne? BloodRayne II: DELIVERANCE? Alone IN THE Dark? HOUSE OF the Dead? House of THE DEAD 2? wingCommander? In the Name of the King? POSTAL? Street Fighter? Street FIGHTER: THE Legend of Chun-Li? Max Payne? Mortal Kombat? Mortal KOMBAT: Annihilation? Dead OR Alive? Doom? LARA Croft: Tom Raider? Lara CROFT TOMB Raider: The Cradle OF Life? RESIDENT Evil? Resident Evil: Apocalypse? Resident EVIL: Extinction? Resident EVIL: DEGENERATION? DOA: Dead OR ALIVE? DOOM? Final FANTASY: The Spirits Within? Final Fantasy VII ADVENT Children? Hitman? Silent HILL? DOUBLE Dragon? Super FUCKIN MARIO Bros?
ALL FILMS of fantastic AND UNDENIABLE quality, Y’ALL!
I absolutely love this comment.
This is my favorite .gif in all of .gifdom.
There’s a real rhythm to the caps in this one. iAMbic penTAMerter SHIT going ON peoPLE. I know there are some anapestic feet in there, but whatever.
Its ironic the tagline is “DEFY THE FUTURE!” and indeed it will, by not breaking this awful tradition of making shocking video game movies.
Hall of FUCKIN’ FAME comment, AnAmPat. Hall OF Fame.
“Lara Croft: Tom Raider” should have been the XXX rip-off title
y cant you let me bury my had in the sand in peace. if i keep mumbling that hitman wasnt bad i might eventually believe it.
AmPat, this is my favorite comment of yours yet. I am retiring its jersey (35, at the moment).
SPOILER ALERT! He dies several times very early on in the movie and each time the movie starts over. And then about 15 minutes in the movie gives up.
ANOTHER Spoiler ALERT:
THE MOVIE IS pretty MUCH HIM CLIMBING up several TOWERS OVER AND over until FOR SOME reason HE IS SUDDENLY moody AND FUCKIN Godsmack STARTS playing.
A++. Although this was a really excellent video game! And I say this as a person who has played upwards of 5 videogames.
Can I go back in time, using the dagger, and comment earlier so I wouldn’t come in and have to say that you beat me to it?
It is difficult not impossible to explain what I just saw, and why Ben Kingsley and Jake Gyllenhaal are in this
Um…Jake Gyllenhaal as action hero? I think I am going to quit him.
Whoever cast Jake Gyllenhaal as A FUCKING PERSIAN has some huge balls.
You Yelled for Me?
Did anyone else notice the strong allusions to Assassin’s Creed? Or was that just me? (*snort snort*)
My avatar motorboats no more. Frowny face.
Assassin’s Creed is awesome, way better than Assassins Creed 2. Bloodlines has been in my PSP (which doesn’t leave my bathroom) since it came out.
If you replace Jake G. with Ben Stiller, this easily could have been the trailer for “generic video game movie spoof” in Tropic Thunder.
This isn’t how I remember the game at all!
That’s exactly what this trailer is missing: Strategically placed spike pits!
DID SHE just say WE MUST TAKE it to the “SECRET GUARDIAN TEMPLE?” Please TELL ME that’s not WHAT THE fuck she JUST said.
WHOOPS!
TWSS
It’s like you’re IN the game!!
Hell yeah, Nick Arcade! I
That show was my shit
You’re the best.
Did you know that in Persia they say “lorry” instead of truck? Fun facts!
he has a pretty impressive man chest in this. if this movie comes on when i am on an airplane, i might actually watch it. preferably after i’ve downed some xanax and beer. which will most likely make the film much better than it is.
Why is everyone British?
Because America wasn’t around back then, no duh.
I would say this is another classic example of a trailer way over-explaining the plot of the film, except this trailer way over-explained why I will not be seeing said film.
This movie needs more Iago.
Calm yourself, Iago.
F’reals though, if it were me, I’d be saying Knife way more than Dag-gah
My birthday is May 28th. Every year Hollywood gives me the same ugly sweater (it has grenades, car accidents, and jack sparrow on it).
I’m sorry! Last year Hollywood gave me Twilight: New Moon. I opened it, ran upstairs and cried.
Joe Strummer died on my birthday – I’d take an ugly sweater.
I get it! Sand! Time!
Wait, what?
Sands will get timed.
Why doesn’t this have more upvotes?
I’m getting a real “The Fountain” vibe here. Cue the animated gif of Hugh Jackman turning into plants!
I could really go for a sliver of that lady-tree bark he snacks on right before he turns into plants.
“The secret guardian temple: it’s the one place the dagger can be safely hidden.” Hmm. If I were looking for the dagger, I might look in THE ONE PLACE THE DAGGER CAN BE HIDDEN.
can’t wait to start shouting “give me the dagger” in a persian accent. no one will be able to stop me no matter how hard they try!!!
The editor who cut this trailer was assigned the task of convincing the viewer that this movie isn’t 90% jumping scenes. He did the best he could, thus the trailer is only 30% jumping scenes.
So… they left Doc Brown out of this one?
Im just glad that uwe boll’s influence is beginning to spread into mainstream hollywood. I also like the fact that Gemma Arterton has a tan cos that makes her persian.
I thought they already did a Mummy Returns
so many good comments, monsters, good job.
I thought the actor was Jared Leto for the first half of the trailer, and I thought what a bad casting choice that was, but then suddenly I realized it was Jake Gyllenhall. It’s a shame there are no Persians anywhere near Hollywood – just cast Jake, he’s nailed that accent.
I wonder if this really was supposed to be a comedy and they re-cut it to make it seem more straightforward? Maybe it’s a laff riot? Please?
Not to racist against time or anything here…but:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tehrangeles
There are some really good restaurants on Westwood! Shahrzad is my favorite. If you don’t like it, you’re probably racist.
This movie looks bizarrely awful on the level of Super Mario Brothers: The Movie. I can’t think of a less convincing portrayal of a “ethnic” character by a white actor. Maybe John Wayne as Ghengis Kahn in The Conqueror?