The first time that our unobtrusive improv comedy troupe, which attempts to bring joy to the world by mostly leaving it alone, successfully accomplished a “mission” was when we peacefully participated in Parade magazine’s fascinating readers’ poll to determine which actor would be best suited to play Clark Gable in a make-believe biopic that doesn’t exist. We voted for Topher Grace respectfully and like adults, as many fellow readers and fans of Parade magazine did, as was our right. Our calm and non-invasive voice was heard, and it was determined that Topher Grace was indeed the best choice to play Clark Gable in a make-believe biopic that is not being made whatsoever. And no one even noticed that we were there. Success!

Now, we have confirmation that a second Videogum Everywhere “mission” has been accomplished! It is, in fact, the original mission for which Videogum Everywhere was created. I am referring to the Videogum Everywhere Paranormal Activity DVD Name Bomb Mission. As you may recall, the creators of Paranormal Activity invited fans of the movie, and also people who had not even seen the movie, to submit their names for inclusion in the DVD credits. Videogum Everywhere “agents” were called upon to submit their names, and one reader, John, has provided the final proof that we have succeeded (thank you, John! Many of us continue to not have seen or have any plans to see Paranormal Activity, so we might never have known of our own accomplishments):

Click images to enlarge:

Now, admittedly, in the original Call to Arms for this particular mission, agents were asked to submit their real names, because it would have been a shame for Videogum Everywhere to be the cause of the entire project being cancelled on account of Silly Fake Name Overload. That would be in clear opposition to Videogum Everywhere’s Mission Statement. But as you can see, the credits were not shut down. The Paranormal Activity DVD was released with credits after-all. And many of the more seasoned agents who participated are probably not even featured in this post, such was the success of their subtle infiltration. We will all work harder next time, I’m sure, to make it borderline impossible to even tell a Videogum Everywhere mission took place at all. But for now, we can wear our Success Sashes with pride.

Congratulations, everyone.

Comments (32)
  1. I too thought we were supposed to submit our real names, so just for clarification, Dildo Baggins was also a contributor to the mission.

  2. Does this mean we all get our own IMDB pages for our “Thank you” credits? I’m going to go on my own page’s message board and mock my own weight! LOK AT DAT ASS MOAR LIEK EAT THA PAN LOL!!!!

  3. You will all be proud to know I did not contribute in the least, giving the success to my fellow monsters.

  4. Kudos to Mr. Boneriffic.

  5. We won! We beat Paranormal Activity!
    Incidentally, my middle initial is actually a V. From now on, I’m going to tell everyone the V stands for Videogum. Rebecca Videogum O’Neal should be in those credits somewhere.

  6. I submitted the fake name “Michael Anderson.” That’s a burn, Paranormal Activity credits!

  7. Topher Grace’s IMDB page hasn’t been updated to include his work in this brilliant film.

  8. Turtle Fromentourage is a pretty good one, Videogum contribution or not.

  9. Anyone know where to find screen shots of all of the credits?

  10. Way to go Videogummers! We did it! Two missions down. There isn’t anything we can’t do (and not bother anyone) if we put our hearts into it.

  11. YES! “DickyVideoGum Stri” 3000 makes the list!

  12. Also: how many “Diego”s are there? I stopped counting after 20.

  13. Oh come on! Where’s William Joel?

  14. I’d rather not wear my Success Sash, but thanks anyway.

  15. Faith in humanity? Restored!

  16. truly, they are american heroes

  17. Real name made it on the list! I wanted full credit for seeing it on Halloween and crying like a baby. I also now have a fear of demons.


  18. Also Clayton Christoffergum made the list.

  19. I am paranormally excited that my contribution, Gwyneth Wurst, made the cut. I would say I’m sorry for violating the Videogum Everywhere Mission laws for my own personal gain, but I REGRET NOTHING.

  20. I guess my real name is too odd. I feel like I just looked through a bunch of “Bort” vanity plates.

  21. I am amused to see that I am not the only Indiana on the list! I also thought we were supposed to use our real names, so no laffs from my entry :(

Leave a Reply

You must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.