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NBC made an official announcement this morning that the contract negotiations with Conan O’Brien are complete, he will be leaving the Tonight Show at the end of the week, and that show will go back to Jay Leno on March 1st. O’Brien gets 33 million dollars of a 45 million dollar settlement, the rest paying for his staff’s severance. The good news is that Conan will be free to work for another network as early as September of this year. The (other) bad news is that the characters that he spent 16 years creating at Late Night will remain the “intellectual property” of NBC (aka Nthe Bone Cyard) and Conan won’t be allowed to take them with him. OR WILL HE? From ABC:

History may be on O’Brien’s side. NBC threatened legal action against David Letterman after the late-night TV veteran moved to CBS in 1993 and began using characters and sketches from his old NBC show. Letterman eventually dropped some of his staples and changed the names of others, according to the Hollywood Reporter, but his classic “Top 10 List” survived.

“It was a wash,” New Yorker media critic Ken Auletta told ABCNews.com. “At some point, you make a decision [and say], ‘I’ve got to cut my losses here and make this go away,’ and that’s what happened to Letterman. NBC finally said, ‘Make this go away … it doesn’t help us.’”

Oh, OK. Let’s just do that then! Let’s rename Conan’s characters for his new show! R.I.P.ESE NUTS! I will leave it up to you guys, because if I do it everything will just be Briumph the Binsult Bomic Bog, and Bimpbot B000, and the Basturbating Bbear. Lazy.

Comments (57)
  1. Success! The Slander Humorist Chien.

  2. Insult The Triumph Dog

  3. The United States Postal Service Cardinal.

  4. En el año tres mil!

  5. The Beat-Off Bear
    The Yanking Yogi
    The Unloading Ursine
    The Stroking Smokey

    I’ll show myself out.

  6. The Self-Abusing Caniform. (Thanks, Merriam-Webster, for the tip.)

  7. Chareth Richter

  8. Master the Mockery Mutt?

  9. I know that this isn’t naming anything, but I was channel browsing the other day when I came upon Leno interviewing Michael Jordan, and since I grew up an MJ fan, I thought i”d check the segment out. During the course of the interview, Leno asked MJ if he could still dunk. MJ just had this look and paused for a second before asking Leno what kind of a question is that and if he’s stupid. MJ. 23. The dude who dunked from the free-throw line. And Chinny Chin Chin asks him if he’s still got it.

    This is the man who’s gonna be ruling late night. This blows. 2012 is here early.

  10. Bonin’ O’Brien – Am I doing this right?

  11. Triumph The Insult Comic Cigar Being Chewed by a Dog

  12. The insult artist formerly known as Triumph.

  13. Generic Hemorrhoid Cream Jeffery

  14. I think COOL4SALE might have some good suggestions of inspired, avant garde names for characters that are related, but legally distinct, from those used on the NBC show

  15. Triumph the Insult Comic Dawg

  16. in the year three thousand and one

  17. But will Leno get to keep his beloved character Doritos?

  18. Pimp Automaton

  19. Dog Pimpin’ King
    Bear MacLoving
    In the year 2012

  20. I hope this doesn’t ruin Arsenio Hall’s chances of bringing his show back to TV.

  21. The masturbating man in a bear costume

  22. The Pets.com Insult Comic Dog

  23. 2 Triumph 2 Insult.

  24. Sear’s Tower in Sear’s Swimwear?

  25. Larry “Andy Richter” Melman

  26. “The Buddy Holly Story” Rosenberg

  27. The Cactus Chef who Plays “Only the Good Die Young” on the Flute.

  28. The Sexually-Aroused Manatee

  29. Ursus americanus cum coitus interrruptus.

  30. The Max Weinberg Seven (with 7 spelled out)

  31. The Walker Texas Ranger Robinson Goldberg Contraption.

  32. What am I supposed to do with my “Si, Conando!” shirt now? :(

  33. They should just make him a passive-aggressive cat.

    “For me to poop on…later today…or maybe tomorrow.”

  34. Pleasurebear

  35. The Masturbating Polar Bear

  36. There’s a bit in the Variety article that says Leno’s buyout would have been bigger than Conan’s contract. Jesus.

  37. The Sofa of Hatred.

  38. The Masturbating Jay Leno Bear

  39. Jay Leno: Secrets

  40. Moose-Knuckle Marie

  41. Wha? Is Triumph even Conan’s to begin with? Doesn’t Robert Smigel perform the character and own the rights to him? I know I saw Triumph on the short lived “TV Funhouse” before I ever saw him on Conan’s show and I know he’s branched off to do many other appearances as well. I think there might be some loopholes available to let Triumph off the NBC leash so to speak.

  42. I think he might go with the Masturbating Peacock or the Masturbating Fox

  43. triumphing the insutling dogging

  44. The Self-potatoing Bear

  45. Reasonable Success the Mild Censure Humor Animal.

  46. These characters might not be gone forever. There is the chance the Jay will just start to use them on the Tonight Show.

  47. He spent 16 years ripping off Ed the Sock, and now NBC just takes it from him!? How awful! It’s almost like it’s the SAME THING.

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