We try to avoid celebrity gossip at Videogum, AS YOU KNOW. Our coverage is mostly limited to Michelle Trachtenberg’s untimely fainting while hosting a party at the Sunglass Hut, and Hugh Laurie’s magical Burger King Gold Card. i.e. We only cover the stories that MATTER. Which I’m sure you’ll agree is the case with this morning’s headline:

CHARLIE SHEEN APOLOGIZES FOR CALLING DENISE RICHARDS THE N-WORD.

Ha ha ha. WHAT?

From Us:

Charlie Sheen is apologizing for a three-year-old voicemail that ex Denise Richards made public.

The voicemail included a curse-filled rant from Sheen calling Richards – the mother of their two young daughters Sam, 4, and Lola, 3 – a “f–king c–t” and a “f–king n—-r.”

In response, the Two and a Half Men star said in a statement released Wednesday, “I deeply apologize by my choice of words to all I have obviously offended; especially to Tony Todd, an African-American, who was my best man at my first two weddings.”

I mean, that sounds like a real DOOZY of a voicemail, but I still don’t understand what Charlie Sheen is talking about. Am I google image searching the wrong Denise Richards?

Whatever, it’s all good now. In these types of situations the most important thing to do is to publicly apologize to your one black friend, because he’s the one who proves you’re not racist. Done and done.

Comments (13)
  1. Gabe, can’t you see, Charlie was just doing his part in using that word as way of dispelling all of it’s negative connotation. And for that, there is no need to apologize.

  2. Wait, what’s wrong with calling his wife a NAGGER?!!?!!! LOL LOLOLOL

    (Bury this comment in the ground as a time capsule so that future generations will understand what humor is.)

  3. man, i love the “surreptitious” descriptive clause for Tony Todd. IN CASE YOU DIDN’T HAVE GOOGLE HANDY WHILE READING THIS APOLOGY, HE IS BLACK, TOO.

  4. I just love the sentence “best man at my first two weddings.” Implying that there have been more since and that poor Tony wasn’t a part.

  5. heather locklear  |   Posted on Jun 19th, 2008 +1

    I’m not sure. Is Charlie Sheen apologizing to Denise Richards or to black people?

  6. Chadams  |   Posted on Jun 19th, 2008 +2

    Rude little pigs, the lot of them.

  7. SailorAlphaCentauri  |   Posted on Jun 19th, 2008 -2

    He still comes out ahead of Denise, so whatever. Besides, anyone can be the n-word. It’s just funnier when whites use it on each other.

  8. TC  |   Posted on Jun 19th, 2008 +1

    He should have pulled a Shia and just called her a faggot. Then we could wonder what the big deal is.

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